mesa147-1 Reviews

Albino Farm (2009)

Watchable screamfest- maybe too much screaming.

[4/10 · 30 June 2009]

Well, I must say it was more than I expected- what a title! A quick description would be a mash-up of Texas Chainsaw Massacre and The Hills Have Eyes. This is classic low budget horror flick that ticks all the boxes for clichés(- see Scream!). The storyline is simple, four teenagers happen upon The Albino Farm and then the horror begins.

I won't say all the acting was bad- I'll just say not everyone was bad. In fact both the female performances were stellar- esp. semi nude scene- which was blatantly a body double. It kept me watching. I will admit the film was so bad that I stopped it playing twice. Maybe it was the shame of realising I actually wanted to know where this tripe was going or it may have been anger- that someone actually made this for my enjoyment.

Was it worth watching? It might be better than watching nothing. I've seen much worse than this.

Bled (2009)

Smoking that stuff gives you one hell of a "whitey"

[3/10 · 12 April 2009]

What on earth? Like watching an episode of Neighbours after drinking two bottles of cough medicine- nightmarish and making no sense at all. I was waiting for the clever part where everything fits into place and saves the film. Maybe it was there and i just missed it, or was lost on me.

My strongest suspicion is that it is a thinly veiled attempt to market a new drug thats about to hit the streets. I wouldn't say "don't watch it" but I will say its pretty poor on every level- like am dram in high def. Whack. Unless you drink two bottles of cough syrup. Then it's just dandy.