TBoldOne Reviews

Any Which Way You Can (1980)

Killing a defenseless animal is funny??? Really, Clint?

[2/10 · 6 August 2013]

Strangely This Movie has a Soft Spot in my Memory - I was a Freshman at College and went to see this movie with my Brother who is 5 years younger than me. He had seen the Every Which Way But Loose Precursor , and let me in on the comedic scenes. If you were 11 in 1978 it was funny. It was great to bond with him, since we always seemed to fight growing up. So 30 years later ....

Well i just got this at a Garage Sale for 33 cents on DVD. I had an inkling of how bad this movie was from my memory but watching it again, phew it's a real stinker.

First my review summary , about the defenseless animal comment. You will never, ever, ever, ever see this full movie on TV because of the Rattler and the "Mongoose" scene. Did PETA not exist in 1978? What was/is the point of that scene? I learned from another reviewer that it wasn't even a mongoose, it was a FERRET. For those of you who don't know, in Asia there used to be betting on a mongoose-rattler type of match. It's supposedly about 50-50, but like dog fighting most civilized people just don't do it nowadays. How in the heck did this scene get into a major movie? (A ferret wouldn't have a chance in this encounter. The producer just said, lets just drop a defenseless ferret into a rattler cage for fun, and stick it in the movie. ) DON'T BUY THIS MOVIE UNLESS YOU WANT TO SEE A DEFENSELESS ANIMAL KILLED.

I digress too much, but I just wanted to warn people. About the rest

Sandra Locke - Untalented, ugly, and can't sing or act.

Clint - Should Stick to Tough Guy Movies. Every comedic attempt ends in disaster.(Anyone remember the 2012 Republican Convention Chair Speech)

Country Music - Really Really Bad in this movie. Way beyond normal country music bad. Glen Campbell wen't way down in my eyes. I can't get the horrid title tune out of my head.

Clyde The Ape - Would scare the crap out of me. Not funny, and his repeating "Right Turn" joke was obviously staged. (If you got hit by a real ape you could be dead). Also if he defecated in police cars, why not show it (The crap at least). Implied Crap is supposed to be funny?

Other People/Characters Clint's Buddy - Pretty Good

Biker Gang - Leader - Best part of the movie. Dumb, funny, harmless. They keep the movie from being a 1

Ruth Gordon - Old

Clint's Opponent - OK - But why the Homo-Erotic bonding scenes with Clint?

Jackson Hole - Looks like a beautiful place to visit +10

Plot Holes - Just the most obvious one. Are we really supposed to believe that two 50+ guys are champion bare-knuckle fighters? Two of the best in the USA? The major premise of this movie would make a lot more sense if both characters were in their 20's.

All the Ape Scenes.

Summary: An unfunny, nasty, nasty movie.

H.O.T.S. (1979)

H.O.T.S - Mindless Innocent Fun - A 70's Movie Time Capsule

[10/10 · 11 December 2011]

First of all, why am I giving this movie a ten? It reminds me of a totally different era. It is weirdly innocent. There is no nastiness in this movie. Even the bad guys in this movie aren't really that bad.

Second, this movie is a time capsule to a more innocent time. Imagine releasing this movie today? It couldn't happen. There just weren't many places to see beautiful naked women on the silver screen, unless you wanted to go to a seedy part of town and visit an adult movie theater. The T&A genre just doesn't exist anymore. In 1979 there was a pent-up demand for this kind of entertainment. Now you can see more T&A on the internet before breakfast than was filmed in this movie. Imagine pitching this script today. "We'll film a zany movie with a bunch of beautiful half-naked women. Teenage boys will come see it for the girls, and we'll put in a few jokes so girls might want to go too." A producer would say "Why would I make a movie with a lot of scenes with naked women? Where is the demand for this product?" The question make no sense today and illustrates how much things have changed since 1979.

Third, this movie, for all the naked girls it, HOTS has a lot of feminist undertones. The women in this movie are strong, and fight to get what they want. The men who try to exploit them are the ones who get embarrassed.

Fourth the women in this movie look "natural." The female stars don't have that nasty silicone look that you see post - 1980. The girls that are "gifted" with ample pulchritude in this movie look real. The stars are not ridiculously hot, i.e. like Angelina Jolie. You could visualize these girls on your college campus in 1979 (if your campus is USC or UCLA I guess, not the engineering school I went to, but I digress)One of the complaints I have about Hollywood today is that actresses just don't look like normal people anymore. I'm sure this is a function of the internet weeding out everyone but the super-gorgeous. The girls in HOTS look like they are attainable, which adds to the innocent charm of the movie.

Finally, the football game at the end of the movie! As a teenager I said to myself, "If I'm reincarnated I want to be the cameraman who filmed the huddles in the HOTS movie!" What incredible creativity! I smile every time I think of that scene :)

Summing Up : A mindless romp to a more innocent time.If you watch it with teenagers today be prepared to explain how and why this genre existed. Today's kid will wonder why this movie was made.

National Lampoon's Animal House (1978)

The End of Innocence = Popularity

[10/10 · 26 December 2010]

This movie was the sleeper of the year. Made on a ridiculously low budget it went on to virtually define the comedic movie format for the next twenty years. The mystery of course is why it resonated so much with audiences in the 70's. I have several theories.

1) The time period is set in the early 60's. This is just before the country went insane . College was a time to have fun. Vietnam was on the horizon, but not there yet.

2) The stereotypes went well with the time period. You just knew that the preppy fraternity portrayals were not too far from reality. Anyone who rushed a fraternity in the 60's and 70's could relate to how the rushee's were treated at the respective fraternities. Some houses you just knew you were NOT going to be invited into. This is really how it worked back then.

3) The simple good versus evil plot line was not overdone. The bad guys were plausible in their badness. You knew people like Marmalarde, Chip, and Neidemeyer, either in college or real life. Bluto, Otter, and the other Delta's acted LIKE we wished we could/would.

4) The jokes have a weird innocence about them. Jokes that should be totally offensive are just funny. Killing a horse should not be funny, yet it's hilarious. Peeping into a girls sorority house should be creepy, but Belushi makes it funny. (I think what makes this gag work is that Belushi is so overwhelmed by the girl of his dreams hotness, that the only thing he can do is pass out. His reaction is authentic, thus hilarious.)

5) There are so many great one-liners, "Thank you God.", "Germans? Forget it he's rolling.", "Fat, drunk, and Stupid, is no way to go through life, son." One caveat, don't over watch this movie. You could ruin it for yourself. About once every 2 years keeps it from getting stale. You'll see something you haven't seen before. Like good wine, it ages well.

A fun joyful movie

The Great Dictator (1940)

A Profile in Courage - Totally Prescient

[10/10 · 21 December 2010]

Wow, what a movie. Other reviewers have covered technical details, including favorite scenes and some minor shortcomings. Consider the following 1) The movie was made in 1940, when the US was blatantly isolationist. 2) The movie predicts that "Hitler" wants to kill all the Jews. 3) The movie alternately portrays "Hitler", as a genius and a buffoon, which he was. 4) This was Chaplin's first foray into talkies. How he adapted to the new medium is remarkable. 5) The speech at the end is a plea/wake up call to the world to act. Of course the world basically does nothing until it's almost too late.

Finally when watching this movie say to yourself, It's 1940, how did he know? It's 1940, how did he know he wants to kill all the Jews ? He must know there will be a death sentence on his head. It's 1940, how could he predict the future?

On a tragic note. How did the US pay him back for his warning about Nazism? It in effect deports him 6 years after WWII ends in the madness of McCarthyism.

One of those movies you should see if you like movies. Brilliant, scary, and unbelievably prescient.

Amadeus (1984)

A Masterpiece of the Human Condition & Music

[10/10 · 20 August 2010]

This is such a beautiful movie. The movie asks the following question. What would you do if you knew the thing you most loved to do you in this world you were given only mediocre talent for? And as a further curse you are given the ability to recognize true genius in your midst, but you cannot be a genius yourself? How would you react?

The movie is told from the viewpoint of Anthony Solieri, a modest composer of Mozart's era. He is happily earning a living as a composer. Everything is fine until he meets Mozart.Given some musical talent Solieri instinctively recognizes the Mozart is an absolute musical genius. Trouble is, Mozart is a crass obnoxious slob. He can't believe that he, who has played by all the rules, who was a devout person could be cursed. The curse is that he recognizes that he's just a hack, and this bore, Mozart, will be go onto musical immortality. How would you react to that? Could you handle the injustice of it all? The music in the movie is beautiful. The acting and costumes are beautiful. The movie deserved every award it received that year. An absolute classic on the human condition.

Several people have criticized the movie because it's not biographical about Mozart. Ironically with the title of Amadaeus, it's really not supposed to be about Mozart. Mozart just serves as a metaphor on the human condition that this movie so brilliantly illustrates, namely that Life is Not Fair.

Nice Dreams (1981)

Lesson #1 - Stream of Consciousness Only Works for Kafka

[2/10 · 20 August 2010]

The third Cheech and Chong movie. To me it was obvious that these guys had only a limited script when filming this movie. The charm, and I do mean charm of Up in Smoke is so not evident here. It was almost like these guys said, "We'll do a scene with two hot girls in a car and a 600 pound dad, and it will be funny." "We'll go to a pot farm where the owner is wonderfully bizarre and it will be funny." "We'll film two helicopters over nude sunbathers, and it will be funny." One reviewer said he thought that the main characters were high when they made this movie. I don't think that, I just think they got lazy. Great comedy is hard work. It is OK to be spontaneous, but it is really easy to fall into a trap. The trap is, we've made people laugh in the past, everything we do is funny, so we don't need to work.

Strangely enough, the best scene in the movie is when they break into the insane asylum and wake up with the crazy inmates in their faces. The people in the asylum genuinely freak both Cheech and Chong out. The inmates looked real and filming with a fish-eye lens adds to the effect.

The scene with Timothy Leary makes no sense to a modern audience. It's just not funny, and strangely sad. Did he need the paycheck? The scene in the restaurant is terrible. One gripe. The women in "girl band" are a bunch of hounds. These guys were millionaires when they filmed the movie. Why didn't they cast smoking hot girls in their films by then? I mean hasn't anybody heard of a casting couch? But I digress.

Another Gripe. Pee-Wee Herman (Pre-Pee) reminded me of why I hate him. Either you think he's funny or isn't. I never got him.

The ending was terrible. It was like OK - we got the money back, but we're Stoners so we lose it and now we'll be male strippers and that will be funny? The only reason I can't give this movie a 1 is the Kafka-esquire scenes. The lizard/Sergeant scenes, and the nut-house scenes make this worth a view on a "bad movie" night at your house. I got this tape for 10c at a garage sale. I wouldn't pay more than a quarter for the movie, but if you can get it for that, go for it.

Up in Smoke (1978)

The First & Best Cheech and Chong Movie

[8/10 · 20 August 2010]

Cheech and Chong were already insanely popular with their comedy record albums and were contracted to make a movie. Hoping to make the "big score" they go to Mexico and end up driving a van built entirely of Weed back across the border. Many reviewers have already commented on the classic "stoner" humor, and I won't add to that. If you get this movie get the DVD with the extended commentary. In it you find that they were on the cutting edge of the Punk Rock revolution. The battle of the bands features some of the earliest LA punk rock bands.

My favorite gags. 1) Cheech and Chong get in their car, do a U - Turn, park on the other side of the street and get out.

2) The Van Scene - This literally made the phrase "If this vans rocking, don't come a-knocking" part of our popular culture. Whats so amazing about this scene was that it wasn't even in the original script! The actress, who played Chongs girlfriend was telling the story of a roommate who was a "screamer", while they were on lunch break outside of the battle of the bands show. Cheech and Chong said that sounds funny, lets film it. It just goes to show you that sometimes the best comedy can be the spontaneous type.

Finally students of film comedy should rent this movie for an unusual reason. Watching this movie in 2010 is like a going into a time warp. This movie could never be made today, and I'm not referring to the drug humor. The pacing of the gags is so slow compared to today. It's weirdly funny when you watch and notice it like I did. Sadly most comedies today don't give their actors time to develop their gags. If you wan't a harmless (except for the drug humor) movie, buy this movie. It is the best of the Cheech and Chong movies

The Breakfast Club (1985)

I teach in a High School, and it ain't like this

[1/10 · 23 January 2010]

I remember I watched this a long time ago before I was a teacher. For some reason this movie was insanely popular at the time. I don't know why. Basic plot 5 kids serve a Saturday detention (where in the US does this happen?), from every high school stereotype. First they hate each other, and in the end they love each other.

The writing is horrible, the actors are not likable, and the movie is not realistic. Here is a realistic movie script. 5 high school kids serve Saturday detention from different social groups. Teacher stays in the room and tells the kids to be quiet, or they will serve the detention again. Kids read or more likely sleep for 5 hours and then leave. On Monday they resume their lives in their separate cliques in their schools.

Oh but my script doesn't make any money because most morons aka the public don't like reality.

Don't waste 2 hours of your life on this turd, you'll never get it back.

Kelly's Heroes (1970)

A movie that doesn't know what it wants to do. A weird quirky movie.

[3/10 · 8 January 2010]

I used to like this movie a lot more in my 20's. It tries to be a war comedy, but falls short. It tries to be a serious war picture, but the action isn't quite right for a war movie. It suffers from "Ramboization." Ramboization is the phenomenon where the heroes bullets always find their mark, but the enemies miraculously seem to miss the hero(s) with far too much regularity.

Basic plot: Typical GI's just trying to stay alive find out about a secret cache of gold 30 miles behind enemy lines. Unit goes rogue, recruits a tank commander and does what the army has been unable to do, mainly break through enemy lines. Several fight scenes occur on the way, mainly suffering from the Rambo problem.

Problems - Movie is way too long. Also the Donald Sutherland hippie character is totally wrong for WWII. I know this movie was made in 1970, but did people think that this would be funny? It's just weird in the context of this movie.

Strange scene: The movie is obviously trying to cash in on Eastwood's popularity. The spaghetti western scene in front of the bank with the Enrico Morricone like music is an obvious homage to Eastwood.

The movie just turned 40 years old this year. It hasn't aged well. Not truly bad, but definitely not recommended.

Schindler's List (1993)

The Triumph of The Human Spirit

[10/10 · 29 November 2009]

I just have to chime in and agree with all the praise heaped on this movie. A movie is great when it shows a fundamental truth. What is the fundamental truth of this movie? The truth is that sometimes people will have an extraordinary reaction to evil around them, and can change their basic nature. Why is this so powerful? Because it is so rare. Most people do not change their nature. Especially when confronted by situations where it is easier to just go along. Oskar Schindler makes a moral choice to not go along. It is tough. It is dangerous. Yet, he makes the choice.

I was once watching a show about the holocaust. The show was about a recently discovered photo album, by one of the killers taken at Auschwitz. One comment that one of the narrators said really stuck with me. "What made these people so monstrous, was that they were not monsters." That is the true horror. Ordinary people during this time period were just doing there "jobs". In other words, what was so horrible about the Holocaust, was not that these people were deviants, but that they were so ordinary, and that this happened in our lifetime.

In the movie Oskar Schindler starts out as an opportunist. He realizes that he can become very rich by moving to Poland and taking advantage of the desperate situation that has arisen there. He does this in a masterful way, and soon becomes very rich. Gradually he realizes what is going on around him he decides that he has to make a choice. The choice is incredibly courageous. What was so extraordinary about his choice was that so few people like him did so during this time period. After the war, most absolved themselves of their responsibility by saying, "I was only following orders." An amazing story. Highest possible rating.

Offbeat trivia about this movie This movie was also written into a script of Seinfeld. Jerry and his current girlfriend haven't been able to be alone. He decides to take here to a movie to make out. What movie does he take her to? This one! This has to be one of the funniest scenes ever in a comedy series. Who could write a scene that is potentially so offensive, but yet hysterical. Much hilarity ensues when Jerry is spotted making out during the movie by a relative.

Billy Jack (1971)

Pure 70's drivel - One Tin Solder Rides Away

[1/10 · 28 November 2009]

This movie is so bad on many levels. My biggest gripe. The hero preaches non-violence throughout the movie and then....

Kicks everyones you know what.

I wish I had rode away before I saw this movie. Just Listen to my review, that was told long ago. Bout a kingdom on a mountain and a valley far away....

Seriously, If you want to see an example of 70's movie making and the belief that we have to pound the message home over and over and over again then rent this movie.

HIYA - I'm running away.

The Big Chill (1983)

Horid , But Kevin Costners Finest Acting Role Ever in a Movie

[1/10 · 28 November 2009]

You have to give it one star, because it's the lowest possible. The basic plot of this movie is that people have serious problems, fornicate for a weekend, and return to their lives completely whole.

This movie is so bad. A suicide of a member of this group has brought them together to reflect on their lives. In Kevin Costner's finest acting role, he plays a corpse who has given these self obsessed people a reason to screw their brains out for a weekend.

I have know idea why this was a hit. It's so bad. Please don't waste 2 hours of your life. Skip this movie at all costs.

(For those of you who don't get irony, Kevin Costner speaks no lines in this movie, thus making it his best performance ever.) The message of this movie is if you have unresolved psychological issues a little bit of whoopee will solve everything. Pure garbage.

Ordinary People (1980)

Devastating - Mary Tyler Moore's Best Role Ever

[10/10 · 28 November 2009]

A shattering movie. I'm glad I saw it, but don't think that I'd want to see it again.

Remember when you were young and you asked your parents the question, "Who do you love more, me or my brother/sister?". Your parents always gave you the pat answer I love you all the same. Well, this movie exposes that lie in a devastating way.

Other reviewers have commented more on the specifics of the movie. I'll leave it to them to give you more details. This has to be Mary Tyler Moore's best performance. Confronted by the death of her favorite son, she just can't cope with her loss. An absolutely brilliant performance by this actress.

I consider movies to be great when they ask questions that we'd really not want to answer, or hadn't thought about. This movie does that. Just don't go to see it if you have issues about parental love, otherwise you may have to confront the reality that Mom/Dad really does like your sibling(s) more than you.

10 out of 10 stars.

The Last American Virgin (1982)

Underrated - Great - Totally Realistic - Would Never Be Made Today

[8/10 · 28 November 2009]

Who would have guessed that a teenage sex comedy could be so deep? In today's movie environment, where the good guys always win in the end, this movie wouldn't make it out of the cutting room . As other reviewers have stated the first hour of the movie starts out as your typical teenage sex comedy of the 1980's. About an hour into the movie it's like someone flipped a switch. It was like, now I got you, here is a lesson in real life kids.

I remember seeing this movie for the first time, and I was totally floored by the ending. The real lesson of this movie is that Love is a mysterious thing. You can't force love on the person of your dreams, sexual attraction is always a mystery. Several people have commented that you should watch this movie as a teenager or with your teenage kids. I don't know if I agree with that. How do you handle the discussion with your kid if they ask "Was Mommy/Daddy the person of your dreams?" Many times the answer would be .....

I remember when I saw this movie I was furious at the girl. But in hindsight, she didn't ask for the boys help with her problem. He offered it to her, but so what? She is just trying to find happiness. Just because she's attracted to a jerk doesn't invalidate her feelings. Ultimately one of the messages of this movie is that you have to find your own way in life, and just hope that the stumbles don't break your heart too much.

I'm amazed that this movie got made in 1982. I suspect that the director pitched it as a teen sex comedy, and the studio said, sure go ahead and make it. Did he then slip the second half in under the studio's nose? If you want to see a brutally honest movie about the teenage human condition, without the sappy clichéd endings that most modern movies have today, rent this relatively unknown gem. Just expect to be a little uncomfortable two hours later.

Ocean's Eleven (2001)

So Bad That You Root For The Casino To Win!

[1/10 · 14 November 2009]

Why do modern movies not have original ideas? This movie is horrid. Everyone knows that this is a remake of the classic 1960 of the same name. There are so many things that are bad about this movie that I can only focus on the most egregious problems.

First - NO CHEMISTRY. That character development is so bad that you end up rooting for the casino! They try to portray the casino owner, who's supposed to be Steve Wynn, as some kind of jerk. I found him to be a sympathetic character. In a heist picture, you are supposed to have sympathy for the crooks. Otherwise, they are just jerks who decide to steal because they are too lazy to make an honest living. Well the movie makes the bad guys look like jerks, and the casino out to be the hero. One wag once said, "Rooting for the Yankee's is like cheering for the house to win in Blackjack." I found myself cheering for the house.

Second JULIA ROBERTS. She can't act, and is not beautiful. She is the source of the dramatic tension in the movie. I just don't get it.

Third TOTALLY PREDICTABLE ENDING. You just knew that the cops coming into the building were fake, and would walk out with the loot. There are so many plot holes, that it strained credulity. The originals plot was more believable, and it was not supposed to be realistic.

Fourth ACTORS LOOKED BORED. Clooney, Damon, and Roberts looked bored to tears. To me it was obvious that they were there to pick up a paycheck.

Overall, horrid, bad, terrible, disjointed. The only rip-off in this movie is to the people who paid to see it in the theater, or worse bought the DVD. I can't believe they made two sequels to this turd.

The Hollywood Knights (1980)

Mindless - Fun - Dumb Entertainment - Watch for Pfeiffer

[6/10 · 13 November 2009]

OK, First of all, It is an American Graffiti rip-off, but so what. Yeah, the actors don't look like they're in High School, but so what. It's crude, has virtually no plot, with the hero's outwitting the dim-witted cops time after time, but it's still a great way to spend some time looking at cars, hearing some great music and having fun. I rate this a six because some of the jokes fall flat, and the plot is very weak. If you want a coming of age movie, American Graffiti is better.

I must say that Michelle Pfeiffer in this movie has never looked better. OMG she is so hot. You can just tell that this woman was going to be a star. She was around 22 years of age at the time of this movie. She has a bit part in the movie, but her attractiveness just jumps off of the screen. She appears in a car-hops outfit, but again wow, wow, wow. I don't remember if I saw this in the theater, but I do remember thinking the first time I saw this movie that this girl was going to be a superstar. If you appreciate just looking at beautiful women, like I do, just rent or buy this movie for her alone.

Additional Irony - The Tony Danza character doesn't want Michelle to leave because she's going to be a big star and forget him. Talk about an unintentionally prescient scene. After this movie Pfeiffer did become a star, and Tony Danza became a ... sorta non-star. Kinda makes you think doesn't it. Maybe the writers knew something about the future after all?

The Endless Summer (1966)

So good it's preserved by the Library of Congress

[10/10 · 27 January 2009]

Bruce Brown's documentary about two people who travel the world in search of the perfect wave was deemed so culturally significant that it's now part of the National Film Registry and now preserved in the Library of Congress.

This movie is a love song to surfing. Obviously Brown loves surfing and movie making and his photography is stunning. What you marvel at in this film is that it all seems so effortless. The two stars are obviously fabulous surfers, but they make the surfing look so easy. Obviously it isn't. This is evident when they meet local surfers on their travels and their skill is readily apparent.

The music is perfect for this movie. The soundtrack by the Sandals, just rolls through the film like the soft waves that roll through this movie. Unlike many sports type documentaries the music doesn't distract from the film, or seem gratuitous. It just fits.

** This paragraph may contain some mild spoilers ** The movie is a wonderful timepiece of a world that no longer exists. Travel to Africa was exotic in 1963, when this film was made. Some of the countries that these men visited are now too dangerous to visit today. Gas in Africa was an outrageous $1.00 a gallon! Other funny details pop up on their travels, that make this movie just quaint. The innocence of this era is breathtaking. The pair just run into people and are not afraid. Also as American's they are welcome everywhere they go. Contrast that with today, where many countries are now too dangerous for American's to travel to. What happened in the last 46 years to change this? I don't know.**

Probably the most amazing thing about this movie is that while it's about surfing, it's not really about surfing at all. It's a movie about the joy of living your life doing what you want to do, and uses the vehicle of surfing to tell that story.

You don't have to surf to enjoy this movie. You just have to enjoy life to enjoy this movie. A perfect movie for a cold winter day, or a day when you are feeling down, or up for that matter. Recommended without reservation.