arpitjawa Reviews

Avatar (2009)

Avatar. Is. Awesome.

[9/10 · 31 December 2009]

Avatar. Is. Awesome. In just a single viewing I've added this to my 'epic' list. What an extraordinary, fascinating, deeply moving and utterly spectacular adventure. A visually incredible and compelling film, it sets new standards for the genre and creates an amazing new world. A riveting, explosive and relentless action-packed thrill-machine that features some of the best special effects, digital creatures and action sequences that are like nothing you have seen before, it will astonish you in every way imaginable. Impact wise, it stands in the league of films like Star Wars and The Lord Of The Rings. It's heart-pounding, mind-blowing and exhilarating all the way to an outstanding finish. There has never been anything quiet like Avatar, so it truly grabs you and dazzles you. Director James Cameron is back and doesn't fail to satisfy with his new vision that truly is a classic. Brilliant film making in every sense of the word.

WATCH IT ONLY IN 3D.

The only flaw? Well, despite the technological & visual majesty (and an intriguing mythology) the film suffers from some painfully predictable plot lines and terribly trite caricatures. I guess pretty much the same problems that plague most of Cameron's films. But as long as people will pay for the eye candy, things like character development & impactful dialogues will remain unimportant.

In conclusion, NOTHING is hotter than a semi-nude blue chick. With a tail. There I said it.

Paa (2009)

Marketing Lesson 101

[3/10 · 13 December 2009]

For anyone who has seen the movie & loved it, stop reading the review now. I'm glad u liked this film & I wish u many such cinematic marvels in the future.

**********

My review is for those who are considering venturing out to the theatre, like I did…with their parents no less, coz haven't we all heard such good things about this film? I mean…it has Big B & (most of his) family, awesome(?) make-up & a story that'll make u laugh/cry & bring your families close.

Hah!

Come one, come all…today's lesson is called 'Magic Of Marketing' or 'How-to-sell-crap to unsuspecting fools'

To start, It seems no popular film reviewer wanted to be in the bad books of Bachan family, so an avg rating of 2.5-4 out of 5 has been doled out, but let me stick my neck out & say it with absolute candor: Paa is pathetic.

*Gasp* How could I say such a thing?

Well for starters, this movie completely failed to 'entertain' me. It was one big yawn from start to finish which was made worse by a sorry script, poor direction and a lead actor who does nothing but wear heavy makeup & tries to act like a 12yr. old while mouthing dialogues that make u want to slap him across the face. Consider this dialogue for size: "…Blah blah…Mujhe potty jana hai…blah blah…"

If only wearing makeup for hours & sounding like a retard would translate to pure genius, this movie would've been passable, but as a film buff I feel like a fool who got swayed by the ostentatious reviews & impressive marketing. It seems Auro is everywhere…from radio to reality shows & even cricket commentary. Frankly, the happiest moment for me was when Auro dies in the end of the film & I get to walk out of the theatre. I think the wisest member of Bachan family was Aishwarya - who (decided?) not to be a part of this project.

It's said the worst thing u can say about a movie was that "It was OK" since only movies that spark debates & violently opposing views are worth watching. By that rule, it's wise to suggest: Go ahead…go and watch this film if u want to, even after reading this review. If u like it, great…guess our tastes didn't match here.

But if u don't, rest content with the thought that there are others like you who are resentful and have felt deeply cheated.

I am one of them.

Rocket Singh: Salesman of the Year (2009)

Clean, Well-intentioned, Honest

[6/10 · 12 December 2009]

Rocket Singh is one of those clean, well-intentioned, honest films that end up getting appreciated by a select group of people. I admit it requires patience to appreciate it fully since quite a few bits seem dragged & dry for a wholesome big screen experience. The Kapoor boy continues to charm & carries this one almost single-handedly. Supporting cast is believable (porn-surfing admin being my fav), screenplay is decent & direction satisfactory. The only hiccup is a sluggish pace & self-indulgent monologues which could've been avoided.

All in all, nothing extraordinary but a worthwhile 1 time watch. I give it a well deserved 6 on 10.

Ajab Prem Ki Ghazab Kahani (2009)

Tthe Dawn Of Retarded Comedies

[8 November 2009]

APKGK was intended & marketed as fun popcorn munching entertainment. However, that's probably asking for too much from this absolute waste of celluloid that's testimony to a new upcoming genre in Bollywood I'd like to call 'retarded comedies' - stuff like Singh Is King, Tashan, Do Knot Disturb etc. that's beyond rom-com, beyond mindless, beyond leave-ur-brain-behind entertainment..it's down right retarded.

Movies like this just goes on to show how marketing blitzkrieg can manage to sell even unbelievably pathetic, nonsensical, nonexistent scripts.

I can imagine only 2 types of audiences who'd enjoy this film: 1) You're a giggly teenage girl with a crush on Ranbir Kapoor. 2) You're generally fond of absolutely silliness.

Gunda (1998)

Naam Hai Mera Bulla, Rakhta Hu Mai Khulla

[8/10 · 19 October 2009]

If Dr. Strangelove brought social satire into the mainstream, Citizen Kane pioneered political consciousness, Roshomon deconstructed the myth of authentic observation, Dekalog tweaked social mores, One flew over a cuckoo's nest overturned insanity on its head, and Kill Bill celebrated the aesthetics of gut-spilling revenge, then there exists ONLY ONE Hindi movie that pays tribute to all these traditions without compromising on the inheritance of a typically Indian narration.

Needless to say, Gunda discards several of the rules, conventions and concessions to tastefulness that plague many Hindi films. The characters speak in rhyming couplets, laden with double entendre for around 99% of the film. Mithun Da plays a coolie equally at home on airport runways and docks, where he has frequent run-ins with the villains as they take their pet leopard for a stroll or organize fighting contests. ... Read More It is high on absurdity and the surreal — in a particularly a memorable fight sequence, Mithun wreaks havoc in a brothel, pile-driving thugs through coir khathiyas (cots) that are suspended at various levels, several feet above ground.

Consider reading this review as a rare connoisseur to connoisseur moment, one that's almost impossible to explain in words & needs to be experienced. Go, get a copy of this masterpiece from your shady neighborhood CD/VHS shop owner now! This film has my highest recommendations.

Kaminey (2009)

Words of a disappointed Vishal Bharadwaj fan...

[4/10 · 14 August 2009]

OK..firstly i gotta admit, I went for Kaminey with a lot of anticipation & excitement.. All the promos and the rocking 'Dhan-te-nan' promised me that I was about to experience an intelligent Guy-Ritchiesque, Tarantino-ish thriller.

But no words I can put here can sum up the movie better than the comments of my film loving mother: "What a mess!!" OK..OK..i'll go back a little..and give the film it's due, although it's awe-fully tough to pin-point the things I liked about this mess without putting a 'but' & 'if-only' after the statement.

The film starts off rather well..the initial pace with which the plot is gradually unraveled is handled very well..the 1st half present an enthralling tale of drugs, deceit, quirky characters and well shot frames with a rather likable dark undertone. Sadly the 2nd half sucks. It does. Suck.

It's as if the 2nd half was written by a completely different individual who was on an all out path of vengeance against the maker of the 1st half. And suddenly, all the things that were great in the 1st half become downright obnoxious in the 2nd. The quirky characters donning names like Mikhail, Bhope Bhau, Lobo, Tashi etc. which seemed very Guy Ritchiesque earlier, now become irritating, one dimensional & unconvincing. The Tarantino-ish use of old songs ("Duniya mein logon ko" - earlier shot on an all red Rajesh Khanna) which seems like a novel concept earlier now becomes a wannabe 'let's do it to make people go oooh so they think we have great cinematic insight' kind of act. And don't even get me started on the final 40 minutes of the film! Damn.

I can go on & on & on about all the little things I disliked or barely-liked which would, in essence break down the facade of this whole film which, according to me was a badly executed, half-baked mess (all due to the 2nd half).

However, full makrf to Fahid Kapur for a brilliantly execufid role as Charlie..and to Vishal - all I can say is that you're a brilliant director no doubt & my salute to you for making Omkara & Maqbool - 2 of the finest Hindi movies made, ever..but with Kaminey, you've certainly lost some credibility in my eyes.

In my eyes, there are only 2 ways to enjoy this movie: 1) Watch the 1st half, eat some pop corn and go back home. 2) Watch the promos again & again while listening to 'Dhan te Nan' on gigantic speakers.

Overall, for me, the movie fails on it's promise and is a disappointing 4/10.

Life Is Beautiful (1997)

Top contender for the best film I've ever seen..

[9/10 · 14 August 2009]

I just can't get this amazing film out of my thoughts and have decided to write this brief review in the hope that I can move on...

"Life is Beautiful" is an unforgettable film. Absolutely unforgettable. This was the 1st film whose DVD screening on my laptop got a standing ovation. I still remember being so overwhelmed, that by the time it ended I was crying. Not sobbing. but crying. It's amazing how this piece of fiction could so meaningfully influence my thoughts & emotions. The story, although totally implausible, is uplifting and depressing at the same time. Please see it for yourself & have a box of tissues handy. I can go on forever describing the inherent beauty of this movie, but will never be able to capture all of it in writing. I simply can't recommend it enough. Roberto Benigni's masterpiece is a true classic. No wonder it's a top contender for the best film I've ever seen.

Duck Soup (1933)

Brilliant. Simply Brilliant..

[9/10 · 14 August 2009]

"I got a good mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it." The Marx Brothers have been fondly remembered for several of their timeless comedy productions. Similar to Charlie Chaplin and Buster Keaton, their classic films are overflowing with terrific gags that are still hilarious even during the 21st Century.

On the topic of the best Marx Brothers picture many will agree that Duck Soup generally comes out on top. I strongly agree. Duck Soup was a massive failure at the box office when first released; despite this, I found the film to be excellent entertainment and one of the best classic comedies in cinematic history.

Be warned, though, that some might not find 30s humor to their liking. I absolutely adored the gags, but there will be some who disagree.

The country of Freedonia is in a financial mess. To save the country from bankruptcy a wealthy woman (Dumont) agrees to donate a large sum of money. But in return she requests that Rufus T. Firefly (Groucho) takes charge of Freedonia. But mayhem erupts when Firefly takes charge; he is a stubborn, sadistic leader who refuses to play politics by the book.

To make matters worse, the country doesn't have a strong relationship with their neighboring country Sylvania. The government of Sylvania decide to send agents in to recover top secret information (i.e. the country's war plans). When relationships worsen between Freedonia and Sylvania, Rufus declares war just for the hell of it.

Duck Soup is a film filled with plenty of wonderful set pieces. The laughs just never get old. Said laughs are a combination of witty dialogue and wonderful physical humor. My favourite gag of the film will always be the mirror sequence. I died with laughter when I was watching that scene.

There are several other physical gags that I will always love but don't do much for advancing the plot. Not that I'm complaining, though. What makes this classic a whole lot better than recent comedies by modern comedians is that there was focus and attention on actually developing a discernible plot rather than focusing on the laughs. The Marx Brothers found the perfect balance of developing a good plot as well as a heavy concentration on the great humor. The plot isn't groundbreaking, but at least it's actually present.

I liked the energetic performances from everyone in the cast. The four Marx Brothers present in the film give it 100% (the final film that featured all four brothers). It's obvious that some of the more complicated gags had to be thoroughly rehearsed. This just goes to show how focused they were in the days preceding a heavy reliance on special effects or cutting corners.

Groucho was the real stand out for me in the movie. Don't get me wrong - they are all tremendously good - but my favourite was definitely Groucho. He was just so sharp and funny! As a confused politician, he nails it. The gags are staged very well thanks to both the cast and the great directing as well.

Overall, Duck Soup is a classic and a fantastic movie. It's funny and very entertaining. Proof that 1930's humor is still funny after all these years.