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john-gagon
Reviews
The Witch Files (2018)
Oddly entertaining
There isn't a tear-jerk moment usually found in drama these days but there is an elaboration here on a real historical figure (sets of figures really) plot from Salem if you're in the know. That would be loosely based on Mary Perkins Bradbury. The film follows found footage format like my least favorite films (end even references Blair Witch at one point), flacid or over-dramatized teen performances reminiscent of an all girl cast Twilight and smoke brush blurry CGI that reminds one of hobby photoshopping with a heavy blur and dodge to it. Yet, I watched it all and rewound it. Despite the very saturated witch tropes, I found myself identifying with the setting and character history which had some remarkable accuracy and at least started to give some insightful dialogue around hereditary Wicca. You see, as one of many direct descendants of Perkins but as one of few aware of it, I was reliving the biographical sketch of Mary who escaped from jail to Maine and for some reason went back at a very old age. Her story is remarkable as she was quite old when she did and seems to have charmed either by magic or virtue an entire town which is how I connected the reference here. I am glad of the moral of the plot and though I cringe of Mary being portrayed villainously, she was portrayer aptly so congruent to her famous Blue Boar escape.
In short, this has some versimilitude I wish other films with better budget and production values had, but it's not bad watching in its own "class". I credit the thoughtful writing here most. This could go almost Sharknado cult classic at some point hence my rating.
Zardoz (1974)
Sean Connery Molest-a-thon, Death is GOOD
50% of the movie is Sean Connery being fondled and molested in some way whether it be babes in robes or old folks despite the barbaric intro. I lost scene count at 28. The rest appears to be a LSD trip fueled barrage of special effects and sexual overtone with confusing bits of dialogue around erections and voting each other out to the old folks home.
It's a bit sad though that this very visual movie had a rather high budget for its time, apparently spent on motifs like statues, kaleidoscopic mirrors, gauze drapery, Egyptian headdresses and bubbly bosoms along with burly furry-chested men in floppy thongs. Despite the kill count, there's very little gore or blood spray. Bodies typically are shown dying with little more than a rouge smudge which belies an overall theme of death itself being trivial and yet a desirable and necessary end.
The film in fact leans heavily into the realm of disturbing fascinations with death but also aging and reproduction exploring several kinds of meaningless existence at two extremes both supporting the death theme. On one hand, you have one class of society inundated with extreme knowledge, immortality and comfort lead by a central command; and on the other hand, you have masses of ignorant, impoverished and mortal victims being killed by a special class of brutal barbarians starving for knowledge and meaning themselves beyond the incessant killing lead by the same floating stone head command center comprised of an advanced crystallized computer system (with wonderful voice-acting) and a magic- marker-mustachio representing Zardoz. The overkill of theme (no pun intended) around death reminded me of A.I.'s obsession with the Pinocchio theme of obtaining existence. It's so over the top that I'm wondering just how much LSD one needs to wake-up looking for the koolaid since after 30 minutes in, I really think I have seen just about everything.
While this film is original in ambiance, it has trope similarities to movies like Aeon Flux or The Time Machine. Overall, I found this film grating me raw with visual technique depending largely on flesh groping to hold me in. It's sure to have a cult classic character if only for it's dated genre, sexual explicitness for its time and the famous lead actor but it is otherwise an insanely directed clever concept B-movie.