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Reviews
Beaver Trilogy Part IV (2015)
Scratching the surface
When I first saw the original Beaver Trilogy someone described it to me as being "something like Grey Gardens". I was actually appalled after I watched it. This has nothing to do with carefully rounded portray that Maysels brothers created. The Beaver Triology is just based on some random footage of an awkward, seemingly repressed and maybe disturbed young man, exploiting his obvious naivety to present him as a freakish fool. Trent Harris looks at his subject with a voyeuristic lense, he never tries to get a fuller, more nuanced picture of Groovin' Gary.
This new documentary claims to show us the bigger picture by giving us insights into both Harris' and Dick Griffiths' (aka Groovin' Gary) side of the story. And while it does give us some of that it never really asks the right questions. At about 15min into the film, Dianne Orr, a producer for the TV station that Harris worked for, is the one of the few voices of reason here: "When Trent showed me the footage from that talent show, I was really worried. I thought it went too far and exposed too much".
Sadly this sentiment is never fully explored in this feature. It does not ask Harris straightforward if he feels reponsible for the suicide attempt of Griffiths. It never asks what it would mean for the subject to be portrayed as a somewhat queer personality in a conservative Utah town. Griffiths, who has passed away since, is represented by his sisters and friends, who can only give us a misty-eyed second hand picture of him, but can't really answer the question how his state of mind was at the time. Harris on the other hand is given plenty of opportunity to glorify himself, promoting his new movie and playing down the moral obligation that a filmmaker has to an unwitting subject.
Hellboy (2019)
Shockingly bad in every ascpect.
There are often movies that disappoint me, but rarely have I seen something that fails on every possible level like this ill-advised reboot of the Hellboy franchise. The CGI here is done so poorly that words fail me to describe it, in the 1990's this would have looked bad. But even in the non-CGI sequences it has the aesthetics of a cheap British soap opera (and hey, in a particularly low moment veteran Eastenders actress Laila Morse has a cameo. Oh yes! Mo Harris is in Hellboy). Why Hellboy is suddenly set in Britain is strange enough, but they overplay it in worst way possible. It's "Fish'n'chips?" here and "I put the kettle on" there. Churchill, Big Ben, Cornish pasty.
But beside all the technical shortcomings, what offends by far the most is that they managed to strip this reboot of every bit of movie magic that made the Guillermo del Toro films so delightful. There's no originality, no fantasy, no atmosphere. A complete lack of love for film making. I could go into more details, but why bother? Clearly the makers of this film didn't either. It's just really sad. Don't watch this.
Forbidden Zone (1980)
Stale humor in hip clothing
In spite of all it's off-beat, pop-colored visuals, "Forbidden Zone" is at it's heart a dolled up version of National Lampoon. Fart jokes and some tits, even the occasional racism - what you would expect from an all male, all white writers and producers club. The late great Susan Tyrell is a delight to watch as she revels in her role of the insane queen of the sixth dimension. The songs are fun too, but the rest is really just thinly veiled ho hum.
Impulse (2018)
Less than the sum of it's ingredients
Trying to mix genres, in this case a sci-fi theme and tale about a sexual assault, can have interesting results, but here it just doesn't work IMHO. The depressing tone of assault story dragged down the sci-fi aspect and on the other side the seriousness of the assault felt diminished by the supernatural element. Bit of a shame because the actors are great, but for sci-fi fans this is not entertaining enough and for a cautionary drama about assault it lacks in subtlety.
Craith (2018)
A local show for local people
After Hinterland and Requiem, Hidden is another crime series set in Wales and again Wales is portrayed as some suburb of Mordor, where people have only just discovered electrical light and readymade custard. The thing is, besides being set in Wales, there is nothing new about this. It follows the same downtrodden path BBC crime dramas like Vera or Silent Witness have taken for the last 20 years. Every detective has to have some personal drama going on, every case has to have it's root in a maze of twists that go way back. This formula is becoming exhausted and change of setting is not enough to refresh it.
Olivia Newton-John: Hopelessly Devoted to You (2018)
It's not that.
Kinda surprised at the hostile reception of this. It is cheesy, but OK for TV I think. It does not have the sex, drugs and rock'n'roll tales of other biopics, but seriously, who thinks the Olivia Newton-John ever indulged in any of these?
Lost in Space (2018)
Give it time.
The original series "Lostin Space" wasn't actually *that* great, it definitely wasn't as iconic as Star Treck, more like a campy real life version of "The Jetsons". Did it need a remake? Probably not.
Anyway, this series tries hard to bring the bouffant coiffed, 60s space-age family Robinson into the here and now. And sadly it starts off with two rather so-so episodes, before it gains some momentum. The family comes over as a bit of a bore and the most fleshed out character is actually the main antagonist, the deliciously unhinged Parker Posey as the manipulative Dr. Smith.
At some stage I actually began to root for her, as the permanent niceness of the Robinsons makes them a bit too bland.
You really need to go through the first episodes to get to the better stuff happening and it does get better. It's a step up from the 1998 feature film. Just don't expect this to go nearly as dark as Star Trek or most other current sci-fi series, "Lost in Space" always was a family oriented program and so is this incarnation.
Siren (2018)
How low can mermaids sink?
"Oh, look, it's Arielle! Cute! Ouch! SHE BIT ME! SHE BIT ME!"
Blood Drive (2017)
Tarantino look-a-likey
I see what you were trying to do there: a Tarantino style grindhouse series with blood-fuelled cars is an amusing idea indeed. There are gazillion litres fake blood spilled here and hot girls in daisy dukes and cars. The latter doesn't impress me much, as I was never much of car chase enthusiast and you have to be one to like this. It lacks a confident lead, like Ash in "Ash vs Evil" and (what I can say from two episodes) also the broad humour of it. Until now I felt the casting needed some more charismatic actors to pull this off, but it's early in the game.
Falling Water (2016)
Aims high, but is not rewarding enough.
Dream related sci-fi show that revolves around three mysterious strangers, a mysterious child, at least two mysterious organization, basically everything here is a but mysterious. There's nothing wrong with a good mystery, but the most rewarding viewer experience is watching one them getting solved. Falling Water is pretty stingy with those rewards. I watched the last episode felt far too many things were left open. Things that were not even worthy of being kept for a possible season two. There's a lot of new age mumbo jumbo going on and some episodes appear to be just fillers, taking the main story arch not any further. I like Lizzie Brocheré, who does her best to ground the whole thing by playing her character very natural and straight, but even she does not seem to know what exactly is going on in show.
The Great Indoors (2016)
I love you, Joel McHale, but no!
I wanted to like this, I really tried, but it's impossible. Joel McHale was hilarious and incredible witty in both "Community" and as presenter of E!'s "The Soup". Why he accepted to star in this incredible dim-witted show is beyond me. The premise of the show is that McHale plays a former outdoor reporter, who now has to work in an office with a bunch of pampered millennials. Yes, it's the old, stillborn sitcom idea: the generation gap. So a typical joke would be that Joel (who is 40something, I guess), has no idea how to use an iPhone (cue to canned laughter) and then Christopher Mintz-Plasse (30something?) helps him out. Now, isn't that funny? Hell, NO! And then there is veteran Britishcomedian Stephen Fry. He plays Joel's boss. And, like him, is completely wasted on this show. I have no idea what leverage CBS used to blackmail them into this stale sitcom, but it must be something punishable by death sentence, because anything less would be the better option.
Beyond (2016)
It's not quite "Stranger Things", but...
With TV series becoming increasingly better, often surpassing the quality of movies (like "Westworld" or "The Night Of"), there is a lot of competition going on. Obviously not every network can spend that much money on a production. "Beyond" aims for the retro sci-fi vibe of "Stranger Things" with a lower budget. The CGI is not convincing and the overall production looks a bit cheap. It does have it's moments, some of the dialogue is witty (though I'd like put an emphasis on "some" here) and the acting id fair enough. For TV it's OK, but it won't win any prizes. Enjoy it as the everyday TV bubblegum that it is, nothing wrong with it.
The Babadook (2014)
Take one look and you can never get rid of the Babadook
The reviews here are clearly divided into those who loved and those who hated it, mainly because this is not classic horror. The Babadook is actually more a psychological drama that uses it's monster as a metaphor for how we deal with our fears, our grief, our pain. For Amelia, a widowed mother with a young, difficult child, her suppressed trauma begins to manifest itself as a horrendous creature, first in her dreams, later in real life. As her mental state spirals downwards, her life and that of her son come in mortal danger. What makes the film so scary and touching is that we all can (at least partially) relate to those dark feelings that conjured up the apparition. A tour de force for Essie Davis who gives us a stellar performance as the troubled Amelia. The whole film is highly stylized, in some parts maybe a touch too much, when in becomes almost Tim-Burton-esque, but the atmosphere it creates does work perfectly.
Alone in the Dark (2005)
What the hell is going on here?
I don't often write reviews here, especially when it's a bad movie, but this one really deserves it. There's no need for me to list all the shortcomings of this film, just read the other reviews here, all the ugly things said are not exaggerated. Sometimes I see a movie that got awful reviews and still find something in it that makes me think 'it's not that bad', but "Alone In The Dark" has no such redeeming features. It's simply the worst movie ever. What surprised me most is that this movie looks like it had quite a budget. Normally you would expect a movie that has this sort of high tech special effects to have at least a hint of a storyline, but this looks like someone cut random action scenes from completely different movies together to 96 minutes of film. Somewhere in the mess is a pivotal scene when a frightened Christian Slater looks into the camera and screams "What the hell is going on here?". I so knew how he felt. Was this movie sabotaged by a disgruntled cutter? Was there a script involved in the making of this? Why did not one of the executives take Uwe Boll to the side and remind him that it would be helpful if some scenes in this movie had at least something to do with the next. And than there is Tara Reid. Nothing spells quality entertainment like the lights going off in the cinema, you watch the screen and the name 'Tara Reid' appears in the opening titles. Before I saw this movie I thought the idea of casting Tara Reid as a super intelligent anthropologist is quite funny, you know, like it would be to cast Paris Hilton as the world's leading brain surgeon. However, now that I've seen it I think that there was no irony intended in this casting whatsoever. Poor Tara tries to play this role straight and to call her performance unconvincing would be the understatement of the century. The movie ends with Tara and Christian wandering through a deserted city, I still have no idea why this city was deserted, but I sure do know why every theater that this movie played in was...
Queen of the Damned (2002)
approach this queen with caution!
This queen was originally damned to to straight to video if it wasn't for the untimely demise of RnB singer Aaliyah, who gives a decent performance here as the murderous vampire queen Akasha. As a supposed follow-up to the hugely successful "Interview with a Vampire" this movie fails on all levels. Anne Rice devotees are in for a major disappointment.
The adaptation is weak, the budget low and the overall production leaves a lot to be desired, which is perhaps the reason why none of the a-list actors from the 1st movie (Tom Cruise, Brad Pitt, Kirsten Dunst) decided to show up in this flick.
If you forget about the comparison to the brilliant "Interview with a Vampire" and the original novel than this movie can pass as a mediocre 'vampire-turns-rock-star-teenage-goth-movie' that will appeal to the same audience as Buffy The Vampire Slayer or Charmed.
2/5points.
Alone (2002)
disappointing!
While the cover art of the DVD lures you into the illusion that this is a "Scream" style horror flick (the cover is almost identical), the first thing to say about this movie is that it is so quintessential english, it could have been shot on the set of "Eastenders". Don't get me wrong, their are a lot of great movies coming from England, but their attempts of making a good thriller or horror film are often quite deplorable. The quality of the sound is surprisingly good, compared to shabby camera work, which is probably the reason for the tag line "Hear the fear". Miriam Margolyes is usually one of my favorite actresses, but here her OTT approach to her role is not in tune with the rest cast. Imagine Mr. Bean showing up in a "Halloween" movie! After we watch the psychotic killer do some of his very predictable deeds, the movie ends abruptly, not revealing the killer's identity, leaving us in doubt about the fate of his last victim and not giving us any clues about his motives. So why bother watching it all?
Dragonfly (2002)
now this is a bad movie...
It is quite obvious that this film was made to cash in on the success of "The Sixth Sense", but it fails on all points. Costner's performance is oddly one-dimensional. The cancer stricken children in the hospital are portrayed so mawkish that it made me cringe. When Costner has a vision of his late wife it looks as if he's visited by the fairy godmother. And it gets worse! I don't want to spoil the plot of the movie here, but it ends so nauseously sweet that I had a toothache afterwards. Kathy Bates is ok, but she alone can't save this movie. The basic story line could have made an interesting movie, but the sloppy production and uninspired performances spoil it all. Rent "The Others" instead!!