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kelvindwikaty
Reviews
Glamorous (2023)
Worst Netflix show ever PERRYodttt
Prepare yourself for an extensive critique of a Netflix show that has reached unprecedented levels of artistic ineptitude and should undoubtedly find its rightful place amidst the refuse and detritus of the entertainment industry. From the very moment the opening scene unfolded before my eyes, an overwhelming sense of annoyance engulfed me, a mere three seconds into the ill-fated venture. The main character's autotuned, robotic, and utterly bizarre voice assaulted my auditory senses, leaving an indelible mark of discomfort akin to the grating sound of nails scraping against a chalkboard. This auditory assault, far from being a fleeting annoyance, persisted relentlessly, its unnaturalness and lack of authenticity proving to be a persistent irritant that threatened to mar the entire viewing experience. It became increasingly evident that no matter how intriguing the underlying premise of the show might be, subjecting oneself to the cacophony of that jarring voice for its entire duration would surely result in an unrelenting desire to scream in frustration.
However, in the midst of my disillusionment, I must begrudgingly concede that a brief snippet featuring the esteemed Kim Cattrall managed to capture a sliver of intrigue within the otherwise bleak landscape of the show. In this particular scene, a gentleman in her office mustered the courage to extend an invitation for a drink, igniting a flicker of curiosity within my jaded heart. Yet, even amidst this glimmer of potential, a dissonance emerged, for Kim Cattrall, a talented actress of undeniable prowess, appeared somewhat incongruous and noticeably older than her counterpart. The resulting discrepancy, while undeniably subtle, nevertheless rendered the scene mildly unrealistic and disconcerting.
Despite my initial hopes and willingness to provide the show with a fair chance, each line delivered by the cast proved more abysmal than the preceding one, causing my optimism to wane rapidly. The dialogue, a crucial element of any compelling production, was marred by an utter lack of originality and an overreliance on tired stereotypes. The screenwriting, purportedly intended to amuse and entertain, instead fell flat, lacking both humor and the ability to engage viewers on any level. Consequently, I implore you to divert your attention elsewhere, perhaps to the completion of mundane household tasks such as laundry, which would undoubtedly provide a more fulfilling and rewarding use of your precious time.
As a fervent admirer of works such as Ugly Betty and The Devil Wears Prada, I approached this show with a sense of eager anticipation, yearning for another delightful exploration of the fish-out-of-water trope within the glamorous realms of magazines, fashion, and beauty. Alas, my expectations were met with crushing disappointment. I found myself unable to summon even a modicum of affection or admiration for this particular production. In fact, the depths of its shortcomings were such that I had no choice but to relinquish any hope of redemption, abandoning it in favor of more worthwhile pursuits. The writing, suffused with mediocrity and a lack of creativity, rendered the show a feeble imitation-a lamentable attempt at capturing the spirit and magic of its predecessors. Its execution felt reminiscent of a low-budget Hallmark adaptation of the genre, a pale shadow devoid of the charm and brilliance that once captivated audiences.
Perhaps the most grievous transgression committed by this show is the participation of the esteemed Kim Cattrall. It is a disheartening spectacle to witness an accomplished actress of her caliber subjected to the torturous confines of this uninspiring borefest. The decision to associate her name and talent with such a lackluster endeavor stands as an affront to her illustrious career and serves as a testament to the show's overall inadequacy.
Furthermore, the show's downfall is further exacerbated by the presence of the main actor, whose portrayal leaves much to be desired. Whether he was plucked from the depths of TikTok or from some other obscure realm, his performance remains consistently artificial and exaggerated. Whether delivering his character's content or engaging in casual banter by the water cooler, his portrayal proves hackneyed and antiquated, resulting in an uncomfortable viewing experience.
Regrettably, the litany of shortcomings does not end there. The acting, the plot, the characters-all fail to elicit even a shred of commendation or appreciation. The lighting, dear god, the lighting! It serves as a glaring reminder of the show's lack of attention to detail, leaving viewers squinting and questioning the integrity of their ocular faculties. The visual experience, akin to peering through a murky lens, engenders a disconcerting sensation akin to acquiring a novel ocular affliction. Moreover, the music selection, an integral component of any production, proves woefully misguided, deviating dramatically from any semblance of glamour or thematic coherence. It appears as though the creators resorted to a haphazard search for "gay music" on Spotify, settling for the first results that presented themselves, regardless of their relevance or quality. The resulting discordant notes and jarring tonal shifts only serve to exacerbate the already dire state of affairs.
As one delves deeper into this lamentable creation, the undeniable truth emerges: it represents an abysmal attempt to venture into uncharted territories and create something new. Alas, it succumbs to the all-too-familiar trappings of an overused narrative, regurgitating tropes and storylines that have been recycled ad nauseam. In the face of this failure, one cannot help but yearn for a well-executed and inclusive sitcom, capable of breathing new life into the genre. Instead, viewers are subjected to an onslaught of stereotypes wrapped in the most atrocious acting imaginable. Returning to the subject of the acting, it appears as though the production team opted for subpar lenses, causing viewers to question their ocular well-being. The disorienting visual experience, akin to contracting a newfound ocular malady, adds yet another layer of disappointment to the already considerable pile.
To add insult to injury, the show's feeble attempts at humor are epitomized by a Katy Perry joke that falls resoundingly flat. It serves as a painful reminder of the show's inability to elicit even the faintest glimmer of amusement. In fact, the show's trajectory more closely mirrors the lackluster reception of Lady Gaga's solo song than any semblance of success.
In summation, it is with great conviction that I declare this show to be a cataclysmic failure, one that warrants its place among the discarded remnants of the entertainment world. Its numerous inadequacies-ranging from the grating voice acting to the abysmal writing, the lackluster performances to the woeful lighting-culminate in a perfect storm of disappointment. To subject oneself to this show is to invite an unparalleled affront to the art of storytelling and a resounding blight upon the medium of television itself. It is a disservice to both the viewers and the talented individuals who grace its cast. In light of its profound deficiencies, it is best consigned to the abyss of irrelevance and relegated to the trash heap where it truly belongs.
Glamorous: Tip the Girls (2023)
BAD JOKE BOOOOOO
Your jokes aren't just unfunny; they're an absolute dumpster fire of comedic failure. This Netflix show, without a shadow of a doubt, takes the crown for being the epitome of disappointment. It's as useless as a broken pencil and about as enjoyable as watching paint dry. At this point, it's safe to say that nobody in their right mind would willingly subject themselves to the agony of enduring this show past the tenth episode.
Episode 10, oh boy, where do I even begin? It's a masterclass in the art of being mind-numbingly awful. From the painfully predictable plot twists to the wooden and uninspired acting, it's a perfect storm of cinematic mediocrity. I wouldn't be surprised if viewers found themselves dozing off or reaching for their phones, desperately seeking any form of entertainment to rescue them from this abysmal experience.
It's bewildering to think that this show managed to secure a green light for ten episodes, let alone any episodes at all. Did the creators employ some sort of dark magic to manipulate the decision-makers? Or perhaps they were skilled in the art of deception, misleading the executives into believing that this show possessed even an ounce of redeeming value.
The characters, if they can even be called that, are as shallow as a puddle after a light drizzle. Their development is virtually non-existent, leaving viewers struggling to form any emotional connection or investment in their stories. It's as if the writers tossed together a random assortment of clichés and stereotypes, hoping that the audience wouldn't notice the lack of depth or originality.
And let's not forget about the dialogue. It's as dry as the Sahara desert on a scorching summer day. The attempts at humor fall painfully flat, eliciting more cringes than chuckles. It's almost impressive how consistently unfunny the jokes manage to be. It's as if the writers embarked on a mission to drain all joy and laughter from the world, one line at a time.
It's disheartening to witness the potential squandered by this show. With a captivating premise and a promising start, it had all the ingredients for success. Yet, somewhere along the way, it lost its way, stumbling into a pit of creative bankruptcy. It's a disservice to both the viewers and the talented individuals involved in its production.
In light of these overwhelming failures, it is my earnest plea that the powers that be grant this show the mercy it so desperately needs - cancellation. Putting an end to this sorry excuse for entertainment would be an act of benevolence towards viewers worldwide. It would save us from the anguish of enduring any further episodes that will undoubtedly be riddled with the same predictable plotlines, lackluster performances, and cringe-inducing attempts at humor.
Let this be a lesson to future creators and decision-makers: quality should always take precedence over quantity. The allure of prolonged streaming revenue should never cloud the judgment when it comes to ensuring the integrity of a show. The audience deserves better, and it's time to put an end to this trainwreck of a series.