jamespippard Reviews

The White Vault (2017 Podcast Series)

Stop After Season 2.

[6/10 · 16 May 2023]

Loved seasons 1 and 2. Some people complain about bad voice acting. But it's much better than season 3 in Patagonia. Avoid that one. It's is really poor, the voices are soooo annoying and it's really difficult to follow. Or nothing actually happens. Either way it's not good.

Seasons 1 and 2 are a good story, well presented and written. Enjoyed them as much as anything else I've listened to lately.

Not sure what happened after that. Like Disney taking over Star Wars...I think the voice actors never met and just read the lines from a scrap bit of cardboard over an occasional phone call with the editor.

The Leviathan Chronicles (2008 Podcast Series)

Juvenile scriptwriting

[5/10 · 30 April 2023]

The plot is decent. The lack of intelligence the scriptwriters give the audience is mind blowing.

I looked around the room using the eyes in my head. I talked to him with my mouth using English words made into sentences.

It's an enormous yawn fest with a constant nagging narrative.

Oh a bomb explodes...let's get out of here. Sure. That's what people would say. Juvenile, lazy dialogue.

I've skipped (fell asleep) several episodes and haven't felt the inclination to catch them back up.

I really don't know where all the Uber positive reviews come from. I'd not recommend it to adults, or smart kids.

The Peripheral (2022)

If the goal was to create such boring dialogue you forget about the rambling storyline, it's a winner.

[2/10 · 25 March 2023]

Wow. How to make a good concept bad.

The dialogue i'm sure is supposed to be witty, pithy, high brow and precise.

But it's written by somebody who doesn't have the necessary language skills or intelligence to pull it off, so it comes across as condescending and self aggrandising. Ultimately boring to the point that it ruins the whole show.

The acting is good. I like the characters. The effects are great. The plot is...well I'm not sure, I lost the plot and the will to watch after episode 5.

The slow pedestrian dialogue slows down everything. Keep your finger on the FF button. It is the way.

Flood (2007)

Who funded this?

[2/10 · 23 March 2023]

Am I alone in wanting the characters to drown? The plumbers moany-shouty-overacting daughter instantly. The Canadian-whatshername. Is she even an actor?

What a shambles. The editing was done by a person who obviously didn't want the job anymore and kept the best bits in his backpack.

The dialogue in the script! Countless meaningless TV movie one liners. 'It's not safe here' no sh@@.

The 70's close up shots to highlight characters emotions. And not in a cool Kill Bill way either.

The wooden characters. No appeal whatsoever. Tom Hardy at least bothers for his 2 minutes.

The plot. It's like they tried to make airplane as a serious movie. She sees a huge wave coming up the Thames on TV after they've known its coming for hours and shouts 'close the barrier'. Yeah, that seems like how it works.

Why was nobody cold after swimming in the Thames for hours? I'd have preferred some of the more useless characters to have to chew through a heavy dose of pneumonia.

What's a Canadian 'actress' doing on this show anyway. She has all the charisma and love interest of a soggy plimsoll.

Carlyle. What's he doing? Suchet too. Looks like they knew it was a dud and just turned up to get to the free buffet.

Courtenay. I thought he at least could act. If he's playing somebody who's dumfounded about his purpose and has to look vacant, he's nailed it.

I'd like to hear the 'stars' interviews about it. See if they can summon more energy to discuss it than they could to make it.

Pathetic really. Worth watching as a guide to how much better nearly every film you'll ever see is.

On the flood gauge this film gets a 2 out of 10. Moist or Damp at best.

The Last Ship (2014–2018)

What's up with the accents?

[3/10 · 20 March 2023]

Ridiculously hammed up English accents. Nobody talks like that. Anywhere. Has nobody on the production team ever been abroad?

I have several other issues with the hokey dialogue, plot holes and cardboard characters.

And they've caught the Criminal Minds disease of everybody standing in a room each in turn each offering a nugget of information to nobody in particular. Super lazy scriptwriting and completely devoid of any reality.

The characters have to tell us what they are doing all the time. 'Let's get on the helicopter' as they are getting on the helicopter. The script is terrible or they think the audience are idiots.

But it's still a useful nap time watch when there's nothing else on.