ayameofazuma Reviews

The Tourist (2022–2024)

Helen ruins it

[5/10 · 20 March 2024]

I really enjoyed season 1, but I absolutely could not stand Helen. She's just about the worst cop ever. She's so timid and soft spoken that it just made it unbearable to watch her scenes. It's amazing that she had been able to even become any sort of law enforcement in the first place. And she should have been fired long ago. She should never be allowed to carry a gun. When she finally has the courage to shoot, she misses by about 5 feet and almost gets herself killed for it. Maybe she was supposed to be that pathetic. Fine. The rest of the show was interesting.

Enter season 2; the very first scene she's seriously in a relationship with the main character now?? There's just no way this would have ever happened. I don't even think I can watch this season now. It would have gotten a 7, but since i can't even watch s2, I have to drop my score.

Voyagers (2021)

Lord of The Flies in space

[5/10 · 7 March 2024]

This movie was watchable and that's about the extent of it. It's not good, but it's not terrible either. The premise was interesting to send this crew of kids on the journey that was so long their grandkids will be the ones to arrive on the new planet to save humanity. But I thought it was kind of silly how they had the ship made up of only the kids and only one adult who chose to go with them at the last minute. There's not enough adults to control that many kids and keep control and order. It was interesting enough that I watched the whole movie, but I wouldn't watch it again or really even recommend it unless you really love SciFi and need something to pass the time. It was slightly predictable and reminded me a bit of The Lord of The Flies.

Sweet Home (2020– )

S2 is garbage

[5/10 · 5 December 2023]

I really liked season 1, but i can't even sit through season 2. It's fine to add some new characters, but this was like watching an entirely different show. There's too much military, but that's not as bad as the whole new cast of characters that I just find extremely boring. The season 1 cast is barely in it. I'm not sure if this is Netflix's fault or not, but their shows often go downhill in following seasons. They change too much for the worst. I have been fast forwarding a lot of season 2 because the dialogue is so boring I can't even focus on it. I'll probably eventually finish it just to see how it ends. But I will continue to fast forward a lot.

Squid Game: The Challenge (2023– )

Netflix lets us down again

[3/10 · 30 November 2023]

The contestants are annoying crybabies who constantly hug each other and cry like they're actually gonna be killed for losing. It's a competition for money; it's not the real squid game. But I also question all reality shows and if they're staged. This series started off boring in ep 1 with all the interviews/talk, but it got better. But then Netflix recently deciding to start making us wait a week for half the episodes made me lose a lot of interest. And I see that the finale is another week wait. So now I haven't even finished watching the second half. I also fast forwarded a lot of the interviews and other boring ramblings and just skipped to the games. Unfortunately it seems a lot of "games" were just a popularity contest, having contestants simply choose others to keep or eliminate. This did not create suspense, simply boredom. It's not the worst reality show ever, but they could have done so much better.

Winnie-the-Pooh: Blood and Honey (2023)

just bad

[2/10 · 31 March 2023]

I shouldn't bother with a review, because the rest of them are right about everything. This movie is just bad. I was looking forward to having some laughs with this one, thinking it would be so bad that it would funny. But the writing is just awful. The acting is worse, especially from Christopher Robin. And there was no ending! It just randomly ended. This could have been made so much better, as one of those humorous slashers. But someone wanted to make this film so badly even though they had no actual ideas, so they made it anyway. The first hour of this movie is so painful that I put it in 2x speed to get it over with faster. In the last 30 minutes, I finally did get a couple laughs, like when Pooh seriously did the Vulcan death pinch. Really?

Nope (2022)

NOPE NOPE NOPE

[1/10 · 6 January 2023]

Not an original title, but very fitting. The trailer makes this look interesting and like a bit of a comedy. The only "funny" scenes are all ruined by being shown in the trailer. The whole first hour is just so slow and pointless. The subplots and characters are all over and have nothing to do with anything. They show the chimp flashback scenes a few times and they have literally nothing to do with the movies plot! After that hour of nothingness, it finally picks up and gets more interesting. It could have been a good story, but it was just all over the place with irrelevant nonsense. And I guess there wasn't a real big budget either. But I could have looked past that if the first hour wasn't so painfully boring.

Wednesday (2022– )

Give it a chance, it gets better

[8/10 · 27 December 2022]

I had some trouble getting into this because it started off like a teen drama, but it definitely gets better. Episode 2 was just corny with the school boat race and everyone trying to sabotage each other. It was sort of a struggle to get through that one. It wasn't binge-worthy at first and it took a while for me to even watch. Then it did slowly started getting better after episode 2, or maybe it was episode 3. Eventually the episodes became much more interesting and pulled me in more and I finally started to really feel the characters. It became more binge-worthy and by the end it left me wanting more! But I do have to say it's definitely overhyped. Did she play the part well? Absolutely. But I'm just tired of hearing about Wednesday this and Jenna that and seeing everyone on social media copy her dance.

The Callisto Protocol (2022 Video Game)

Combat is too sloppy!

[4/10 · 19 December 2022]

I really wanted to like this game. It looks great and the story is interesting. But the combat is so clunky and just straight up sloppy! It's impossible to reload your gun or heal during a boss fight because you get hit as soon as you try. You also can't turn and run away from the swarms of monsters that attack relentlessly to get some space between you for just a moment to reload. You can't reload and dodge at the same time. TwoHead is hard enough as is the second time around and then you get attacked from behind while fighting him as well. I didn't make it any further; I had to give up due to the poor combat. I play most games on Normal/Medium but I had to put this on Easy. A challenge is fine, but Easy in this game is more like Hard. I should be allowed to enjoy a game too...on a slightly easier setting if I have to quit because it's become impossible to me. Not everyone is a teen boy or young adult who argue that all these difficult games are just "easy" to them. I enjoyed Dead Space (same creators) and I enjoy some games that require some technique in their combat. But this game becomes too repetitive fighting the same exact monsters over and over and I just can't get past it's troublesome, clunky gameplay. And every time you die, the loading screen is ungodly long! It's getting a 1 because it's now a total waste of $70 for me as I'll never get to finish it! And I don't understand how it has such a high rating on here, as I've heard a lot of the same complaints I've made.

When Darkness Falls (2022)

Worst fight scenes ever

[3/10 · 31 October 2022]

Well, the story was semi interesting. But it's low budget so the acting is pretty bad. But the woman playing "Andrea" and the man playing "John" are some of the worst actors ever. I'm sorry I don't remember their real names, but after seeing this movie I never will. The fighting scenes are SO bad they are hilarious. And apparently there is a shotgun in existence that is completely and utterly silent when fired. These people all make the dumbest decisions ever. And although that's typical in horror movies, it was slightly infuriating here. The "twist" ending didn't explain much at all either. They never explained the connection to the two psychopath men. It partially seemed like they were in on it, yet they got in the way so how could they be?

Mr. Harrigan's Phone (2022)

Smartphones are bad, mmkay?

[4/10 · 17 October 2022]

This is not a horror movie, but that didn't bother me. The fact that the entire plot just goes nowhere is what wasted my time. It was just interesting enough to finish watching, but it has no ending! It just abruptly ends. Nothing that happened were given even any possible explanations. Mysterious deaths in Harrigan's past and current mysterious deaths possibly still from Harrigan, but never exploring the topics even a little bit to solve some mysteries. Harrigan only sends three gibberish texts the whole time and "calls" once I think. They tried saying it was just in Craig's mind because he's too addicted to his phone. And that's about all they explored. Smartphones are bad, mmkay?

The Midnight Club (2022)

Just drama, not horror!

[5/10 · 12 October 2022]

I watched this because the description lead me to believe it was horror, but it's nothing much other than a drama. It's definitely sad, as it's about facing and fearing death, especially at such a young age. The parts of the show about the teens themselves is interesting, but their midnight club stories are boring and add nothing relevant to the plot. I actually fast forwarded through most of their stories, as I simply wasn't interested. It lead me to believe that scary, ghostly, horror-type things would happen at said midnight club. They didn't. Other than a few times they attempted "jump scares". And just to be a little picky, some stuff really didn't make much sense. A handful of dying teens sent to an old mansion turned hospice with only one doctor around and the woman who owns it. A bunch of kids dying of cancer, meaning they definitely are on meds and need a lot of care, and there is only one doctor and one night nurse. Some of them literally collapse due to their illness and just wake up in a "recovery room" in the house, no doctors even around. With the level of care they receive day to day at this hospice, I fail to see why they can't just live at home with their actual family and loved ones for their final days.

Joe vs. Carole (2022)

Why is Carol good??

[2/10 · 22 September 2022]

Why is Carol Forking Baskin portrayed as if she's the hero in this show?? I can't even sit through it because I am absolutely not on board with that. Joe Exotic is not innocent, but Carol also certainly isn't! They still never found real proof that her previous husband is alive because she probably really fed him to the tigers. So I simply cannot watch her being portrayed as this great person. I love Kate McKinnon but she doesn't seem to act kooky enough as Carol. Having seen the real Carol talk on multiple shows and social media before, I feel she is almost always a bit loopy, flaky and just corny. I think John Cameron Mitchell portrayed Joe pretty well. But maybe I did not watch enough to see if Kate acts kooky later on.

Jurassic World Dominion (2022)

Nothing but chaos

[2/10 · 21 September 2022]

I finally was able to stream this movie and I was hoping the bad reviews were all exaggerating. They were not. I'm a huge fan of the Jurassic Parks. The Jurassic Worlds were never quite as good, but this one is a joke. It's nothing but chaos the entire time. The entire movie is dinosaurs chasing people in cars through cities and just all over. They introduced a lot of new dinos but only for a few minutes of screen time each. They were more focused on the prehistoric locusts for the storyline. There is a lack of the fun, excitement and any suspense that all the other movies have. How can there be any enjoyable suspense when it's just constant chaos and action scenes the entire time? What's sad is that the best part of this movie was Grant & Ellie still having love for each other. This movie is just bad.

Morbius (2022)

its too rushed

[5/10 · 17 September 2022]

Not knowing anything about Morbius or his story, this movie is just very rushed! I thought the plot of this movie sounded interesting, but I had no idea it was even Marvel until I pressed play. I don't read comics so I'm unfamiliar with Marvel characters besides the ones that everyone knows. When I looked Morbius up, a quick skim of his story didn't seem to match this movie at all. It was interesting, but in no means a good movie. The story is just too rushed and the final fight was rushed. Why didn't they make this movie longer? A lot of movies are over two hours long anymore. This would have given a little more time for story, character development and explanations. I think this whole movie was rushed just to set up a sequel that would further explain anything in this first movie.

Devil in Ohio (2022)

Teen drama, not horror

[3/10 · 7 September 2022]

This show is not thriller or horror; it's more of a teen drama. If I knew that going in, I wouldn't have bothered. By episode 3 I was ready to turn it off because still nothing has happened. They try to make Mae out to be so evil, but she doesn't really even do anything wrong, she's just kind of awkward seeing how she was raised brainwashed in a cult. She stole a photo and a t-shirt, oh no! Cue the suspenseful music! They keep on playing the suspenseful music, but nothing suspenseful even happens to match it. They lead you to believe she poisoned someone, but literally nothing comes of it. Later she does do some "wrong" things, but it's just typical teen drama stuff, still not evil stuff. I almost gave this a 5 for trying, but it did nothing but waste my time, especially after the lame finale. Netflix keeps canceling good shows that do well to make room for new garbage like this. Why??

The Lost City (2022)

It was...ok, I guess...

[4/10 · 26 August 2022]

I don't think it was quite as bad as all the 1 & 2 star reviews, but it's not too good either. It's watchable. There were a couple funny scenes, but most of the jokes were just too corny. The best part of the movie were Brad Pitt's scenes, which weren't long enough as he's not a main character. And Harry Potter cannot act. The ending was also underwhelming.

The Gateway (2018)

Low budget does NOT = bad movie

[8/10 · 14 August 2022]

Everyone's complaining about it being low budget, but if the movies good, who cares. I don't know what some people want. Does it have flaws? Yes of course, but what movie doesn't have some, really? But there's only one thing that did bother me: Why would scientists working on such a top secret project NOT lock their lab door so anyone can just wander in? Especially after learning it was a portal to a multiverse. It was an interesting story and the acting was fine. I won't spoil it, but I'll say the ending has been done before, or at least very similar, but that's not necessarily a bad thing either. I enjoyed this movie, as I often enjoy both time travel and multiverse movies.

Meander (2020)

No dialogue, just grunting

[1/10 · 10 August 2022]

Want to watch someone crawling through narrow tunnels screaming, grunting, panting & moaning for an hour and a half? Then this movies for you! Six minutes into the movie the woman wakes up in the tunnels and I already had to start fast forwarding because I was so bored. Every time I hit play it was just more grunting and groaning. Fast forward. 45 minutes in there's a random monster, which was slightly interesting. Three minutes later I found myself fast forwarding again. An hour in there's some sort of "flesh walls" that are copying another movie, but I can't think of which. The monsters back! Here's more grunting and yelling. Next she hallucinates her daughter. Wow, some dialogue! And only an hour into the movie! Ok, back to the grunting. She finally wakes up outside. Is she dead? We're told her "body died many times". Oh ok. Makes perfect sense. Why was she put in there in the first place? Nothings explained. I may have watched 15 minutes total of this movie and even that was a mistake.

The Unsettling (2019)

This show makes no sense whatsoever

[3/10 · 5 August 2022]

This show made absolutely no sense. It was slow paced, but thankfully short. It went back and forth between slightly interesting and boring. There seemed to be a ghost attacking only the newest foster girl, but not any of the others who have been there for some time. They lead you to believe there's something really wrong with the bio son, who seems to be making the ghost attack and kill with his voodoo dolls; but in the last episode they just drop that entire plot and he's totally normal. In the final episode, the ghost who has been trying to kill the new girl, and who I believe did kill the neighbor, suddenly was believed to be "actually trying to help them". Then they try to make a twist at the end, which answered zero questions about anything that happened the entire show. And then it simply ends without explaining a single thing and without showing the outcome of anyone's lives in the aftermath of all this. Pointless crap.

Oxygen (2021)

Decent thriller, but wouldn't watch again

[6/10 · 18 July 2022]

You'd think watching 1 hour and 40 minutes of someone trapped in a cryo-pod would get insanely boring; but it actually got more interesting as it went on, as it revealed more mysteries. It kept me interested the whole time, but I did not care for the ending which I will not spoil, but by that I mean only the last maybe 8 minutes. So overall, in it's original French version with English subtitles, it's a good watch with good acting. But I also would not care to ever watch a second time.

Sonic the Hedgehog 2 (2022)

I'm sorry, but this movie is painful

[1/10 · 24 June 2022]

I grew up playing Sonic 2 & 3 so I was excited to see Tails & Knuckles in this movie, but it's just painful to sit through. The plot is just bad and all over the place, at one point even focusing on some random peoples' wedding. The jokes are not funny. At all. Even the 90's cartoon wasn't this corny! Sonic was always "cool", but this movie just makes him a clumsy doofus! He's immature & makes messes, he's whiny and he's annoying. Jim Carrey does amazing as Eggman, so no disrespect to him or to James Marsden, who I also like, but the story/writing is just too awful to even sit through!! I'm going to go watch the silly 90's cartoon again, the one with Eggman's dumb robot henchmen, and just pretend these movies don't exist.

The Quarry (2022 Video Game)

Awesome & fun survival horror game with some annoying issues

[8/10 · 12 June 2022]

Awesome game, yet a little disappointing. It is probably my least favorite of all Supermassive's horror games. That being said, I still played it 3 times in a row. But it only kept me entertained once the story actually started, which took about 2 hours I think. The characters are all really annoying except for 2 of them. Max (Skyler Gisondo) did not disappoint; He's very funny but he wasn't in enough scenes for me. Dylan was also hilarious. This game made me laugh as well as keep me on edge. Some of the dumb choices you might make back in chapter 2 can cause a death near the last chapter or even make you a miss a clue. That's typical for Supermassive's games though. There is a "chapter select" option once you beat the game, but the problem is that whatever chapter you select is where you will now start over. Once you use chapter select, that's it until you beat the game again. It makes it very difficult to accomplish everything since they claim "186 different endings". There's no option to skip any cut scenes you just don't feel like sitting through again! I'd definitely watch some of the fun scenes again, but some are just too long and boring like listening to Emma go on and on while videoing herself for social media! There's also a few glitches. The game has crashed on me a few times. Both randomly and when trying to use a "death rewind". I was unable to bring back a character I accidentally killed because it crashed every time I tried to use "death rewind". Also, back to the choices you made in a previous chapter thing; apparently people didn't realize using "death rewind" in a really late chapter could warp you right back to chapter 2 to start over from there. So be careful with that. And another glitch is that the dialogue often repeats at the start of new scenes. I just wish they'd add an update to let you redo chapters to collect everything, rather than fully start over from that chapter. And the ending is really lame. It's only a sentence for each character written about if they survived or died. There's no cut scenes with any of the survivors meeting back up or seeing them leave the camp. And then there's the final 15 minute, very boring podcast cutscene that you aren't allowed to skip!

Stay Close (2021– )

Story all over and goes nowhere

[2/10 · 6 May 2022]

I can definitely see how this is the same creators as The Stranger, but this one was even more poorly written. The story drags on with many different twists with zero explanations until halfway through the final episode. So most of this shows twists make no sense from the lack of explanations throughout. They try to shock you at the end of each episode, but how can that even work when you've discovered literally nothing yet. Then there's Ken and Barbie, the random psychopaths hired to find the missing kid, who murder anyone in the way, and do dance numbers in between hiding bodies. There's zero reason for their existence. The last 3 minutes is the only decent twist, if you can call it that, but that wasn't even good either because it made no sense why he did what he did. Waste of time!

Choose or Die (2022)

Choose or Die of Boredom

[1/10 · 18 April 2022]

There's a lot of shows/movies with this same concept anymore, but they're all just done terribly. Some higher power making you do awful things or make terrible choices. Oftentimes there's no real explanation to this higher power, or at least one that makes much sense. But can the choices at least be interesting?? In the beginning apparently "clean up" means "eat glass". And don't get me started on the last 20 minutes. The whole thing just makes no sense. I usually reserve 1 stars for movies I have to turn off, but this one definitely deserves it too.

Scream (I) (2022)

Complete Garbage

[1/10 · 23 March 2022]

They wanted to make a new Scream movie but nobody had a single idea for a storyline. They made it anyway. I had a little hope for this movie, but it was just bad. It was so poorly written. Nothing made sense. The killers motives made no sense. I also loved how the hospital was complete empty during the day. No staff anywhere. No doctors, nurses or patients anywhere. Just Ghostface and his targets. So bad.