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Reviews
Captain Mike Across America (2007)
Mike gives speeches, shows a musical guest and moves to the next city. Repeat.
I voted against Bush in 2004, but the film was actually pretty boring and didn't bring anything new to the table. He had promised he'd throw his next documentary online, maybe he threw out this stuff because he didn't want to skimp out on the earning potential of an actual decent documentary he's making.
I had thought he was making a documentary showing all the things corporations have been getting away with in the last four years, but actually it's about Michael Moore's tours around the country for the 2004 elections. Literally it's just footage of his speeches to different universities and local press conferences when he toured several cities in swing states. Moore didn't present anything new we hadn't been hearing for the last 8 years and he said absolutely nothing about the 2008 candidates.
The format of the video was depressing. Moore says bring back the troops, kick out bush for a while to a cheering audience, it shows a random musical guest or celebrity then it shows a news caster talking about what the polls show to give a little time effect. While there's nothing particularly wrong with format, that's all there is to this film, it just repeats over and over as he tours different cities.
What the heck just happened? The blip.TV embed does not allow seeking so I couldn't just skip to the end to see if he had something more aggressive or interesting up his sleeve. Moore is know for stirring up controversy and attacking what he feels are the "bad guys" straight-on. There was no face-to-face talks and interviews, only speeches to loving supporters and in a few instances, quips to the opposition that also showed up. He should have made a real documentary or at least critical review of the 2008 candidates, the slacker uprising could have been a DVD extra at best. Edited footage of him as super hero almost changing the tide in the swing states will only gain support from the hardcore Michael Moore fans. Moore brags in the film about how 30 - 40% of republicans that watched Fahrenheit 911 ended up liking it. The same cannot be said for this film. There is no investigative journalism like his previous documentaries. It's Moore talking to his supporters and registered democrats in addition to having the benefit of editing his "best of" moments.
Republicans that watch it will only get annoyed. The film starts by saying Kerry was in the lead until the Bush admin ran an unfair smear campaign on Kerry. Kerry did nothing and his popularity dropped among veterans. Moore countered this pretty well in the movie, but he didn't counter the footage of Kerry saying he would have voted for the war even if he knew the intelligence was false at the time. A few moments in the film would drive zealous republicans crazy like: allowing a guest to sing the Finland national anthem to a confused crowd that wasn't properly told why, his comments on immigration, some of Roseanne's over the top jokes, and finally Moore insanely accepted, I believe it was, a bronze star that belonged to the grand father of one of the people in an event. Literally a guy went up and offered a family war metal from a deceased relative. I cringed as Moore seem to give as little humility to it as someone offering to pay for his dinner, "Really are you sure? Wow thanks." It's a waste. People fight to defend their country but more so to defend their family. You just can't take something so personal to someone's family history when its completely meaningless to yours. Democrats who watch this movie will get bored, since it's the same rhetoric we've already heard. Go watch several of Obama's speeches or check his website instead of watching this movie. Republicans who watch it will get annoyed and have more to complain about, further outlining the divisions between the parties that we should instead work to break.
Knocked Up (2007)
Largely over rated
Very decent romantic comedy. It has a bunch of stoner jokes that just aren't funny to me anymore, "duuuuude". They're just overused in bad movies. Most of the comedy was just cheesy and a few elements like the website and the phone call message never really got settled. Things just sort of speed up near the end to tie things together quickly and I didn't feel there were any significant plot twists or surprises that seemed creative. The reoccurring beard jokes introduced at the beginning got annoying because the guy is always serious and you can see them coming every time he appears on camera. The lame female boss got annoying rather than making me actually laugh. I've honestly met people like that.
The Secret (2006)
Everything they say is renaming persistence
All they do is encompass persistence into a stupid ass nickname called "law of attraction" then they give a pseudoscience explanation saying your thoughts are resonated to others and that gets you want you want.
Wanting something bad enough, and invisioning yourself as having accomplished goals aren't novel ideas, but morons watching this video seem to think this is revolutionary stuff when packaged into a phrase called laws of attraction.
I can assure you Einstein and everyone in history would not have payed a cent to watch this trash. Wanting something bad enough is a over simplification made by stupid people trying to resell common sense in a new package for stupid people that get a rise off motivational speeches and infomercial style guarantees. They had discipline and obsessive dedication to their respective field.