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harri_b
Reviews
Saving Private Ryan (1998)
Just...wow.
What an amazingly breathtaking piece of cinema. The fact that people on here are posting that "Black Hawk Down" is better than this must be on something. "Black Hawk Down" is a load of bull compared to "Saving Private Ryan", perhaps the most prominent difference being that the former is like 3 hours of propaganda and bad acting and the latter is without doubt the truest and most beautiful portrayal of WWII yet.
The cast were excellent: standout performances from Ed Burns (Reiben), Giovanni Ribisi (Wade), Barry Pepper (Jackson) and of course Tom Hanks (Miller). The only film that can really move anyone to tears.
Bram Stoker's Dracula (1992)
what a way to ruin a great story..
i am sorry but this movie defines suckiness. i thought it would be impressive at least..francis ford coppola is a pretty cool guy, right? and the cast is superb..though i am never quite sure why keanu reeves was ever cast as anything. but i was wrong. much of the acting is wooden and pretty damn unfeeling. keanu reeves' and winona ryder's pathetic attempts at an english accent are laughable..wot no voice coach? the count, though suitably scary-looking, also looks like something out of star trek. gary oldman sadly overdid his acting, as per usual. keanu reeves simply makes a fool of himself with his dull acting and non existent presence, dreadful haircut, and aforementioned terrible english/american valley guy mixed accent. winona ryder is pretty but bland in comparison to the bright and lovely sadie frost, and her accent sucks too. the texan drawl of the american dude is sadly overstated, just when you thought things couldn't get any worse. the story has been ruined..anyone who has actually read bram stoker's novel can see that. for example what's with lucy westenra's character?? she has been morphed into some kind of nymphomaniac, whereas in the book she is written as a kind and sweet young girl, which is why everyone cares so damn much about her anyway. the beautiful use of descriptive language used in the book's collective diary entries has been abridged in such a way that we hardly believe such supposedly literate individuals could write that kind of 8 year old's account of important events. credit is due to superb performances from the brits amongst the cast..richard e grant is a convincing and brilliant dr.seward, sadie frost is perfect as lucy westenra, and anthony hopkins plays the role of van helsing beautifully. it is, sadly, half what it could have been. despite cast members salvaging some credit, this is a thumbs down. :(
Red Hot Chili Peppers: Funky Monks (1991)
um..yeah..whatever
i love chili peppers, they are the funkiest monks around, and this video does plenty of justice to their amazing sound, bla bla bla.. its also kinda funny coz u get to see how sh*t anthony is at singing when his voice isn't all modified and stuff, and how drugged up john frusciante obviously was, and how the bands' sick minds work when they read gross magazines. do we really need a running commentary?! and another thing. what is with the black and white? i suppose they didn't want you to see how dingy and cheap their clothes were as they spent all their money on drugs and women. there are also lots of other freaky people on here including this odd guy with an intriguingly long beard, and this girl who likes taking her top off. quality viewing as you can see.
Scene: Stone Cold (1997)
this is crap, don't see it..
(spoilers ahead, sorry..) i read the book *stone cold* in class and we watched the film to see how successful the adaptation was. and the adaptation sucked. frankly, this is one of the most dreadful pieces of cinema i have been unfortunate enough to come across. the acting is weak, pathetic and downright annoying, the settings waver between overdone realisticness and obviously cardboard props, and the script is the poorest i have heard in a looooong time. it starts when this boy (he's link, its not his name but its what people call him) falls out with his caricature of a stepfather vince, and goes to london. he spends all his money on renting this nasty little room owned by an evil guy who takes all his money and has a fake cockney accent, and is forced to make friends with another bum called ginge (ginger in the book, but don't worry..) then, durn durn durn, ginge disappears along with some other homeless types, but link for some magical reason has some money left so he buys this homeless girl gail a coffee or something and falls for her oh-so-sexy scottish accent and manky hair. and they make loads of money begging (yeah right) and they still have time to solve a great detective mystery concerning a psycho called shelter who kills people and hides them under the floorboards. in the end link doesn't die (shame), and gail isn't actually homeless she's a reporter and its all very sad but no one really cares because link is a boring bumpkin with a stupid accent. the end.