Kelv-1 Reviews

An Evening with Kevin Smith (2002 Video)

Must Have for Everyone

[20 January 2003]

Good chance is that if you asked an average person on the street

who Kevin Smith was, they wouldn't have a clue. Others might say

he's a comedy genius who has made four of the most important

films of the nineties and is one of the best speakers in the history

of show business. I fall into the latter. However, Mr. Smith may be

much more famous in, say, another ten years time. He is working

on the new J. Lo film 'Jersey Girl' and is planning to make a new

'Fletch' film, both of these will improve his star-o-meter (is there

such a thing?). I have had the great opportunity to speak to Kevin in

the flesh and also see him do his Q&A live so I was very excited

about this new three hour epic. Some people may think, at three

hours, this is a fan only topic but with it's entertaining stories and

Kevin's great style of talking, this is for anyone who has a tiny bit of

time to spare. This documentary, lifted from Kevin's Q&A tour is a

gold mine of information here. Take a look at this and at his other

DVDs and you will come out knowing every bit of information about

the man himself, Kevin Smith. We hear him talk about the

infamous 'Superman' script, his protesting for his own film

'Dogma', his first sexual encounter with his wife (in painful detail)

and how he met the man he made famous... Jason Mewes! (Yeah,

he mentions that affleck guy too). While the entertainment value of

certain stories differ, never once is it boring. Lie back, put your feet

up, get an alcoholic beverage of some kind and watch 'An Evening

with Kevin Smith'!

Evil Dead II (1987)

The Sequel to The Ultimate Experience in Grueling Terror

[20 January 2003]

Horror sequels aren't always what you want them to be. Mostly,

they are just in need of desperate cash so the idea of a sequel

comes to them but with Evil Dead 2, they made a difference... 'The

Evil Dead' was a dark, disturbing and plain horrific horror movie

that had you jumping out of your seat but 'Evil Dead 2: Dead by

Dawn' is a hilarious comedy. Funny, weird and "Groovy"! This film

has it all: A man mutilating himself (funny, of course), swallowed

eyeballs, A severed hand killing people (the inspiration for 1999's

'Idle Hands') and, of course, a decapitated dancing corpse. Yes,

it's a horror movie with a difference alright and while some fans of

the original 'Evil Dead' will be dissapointed that this is less horror,

more looney tunes, others will be delighted at this film's strange

and original premise: Of taking the original film and totally flipping

it on it's head, simaliar to what 'Gremlins 2' did a few years later.

Unlike that film however, this film picks up right where the original

left off right at the very second. Ash, after a long demon filled night,

is once again attacked by the evil force in the morning and falls

unconscious. Later on when he wakes up, it is almost night and

the horror is starting again. This time, the evil is almost mocking

him to the point where they possess his hand and start killing him

with it. But Ash is soon to be joined by four others, who are also

seemingly doomed mainly by the strange demon down in the

cellar by the name of Henrietta. It's up to Ash to kick some demon

butt. For me, 'Evil Dead 2' just improves on the original but isn't

anywhere near as good as 'Army of Darkness'. Still, the film is

entertaining right up to the twist ending and for many this is the

ultimate in horror comedy. A film that has spawned endless

copycats, some excellent and some just doing it for cash, 'Evil

Dead2' is THE original.

The Evil Dead (1981)

The Ultimate Horror Movie

[20 January 2003]

Released twenty years ago, 'The Evil Dead' is still a film that holds

up today. An unusual mix of grim horror and laugh out loud black

comedy, this first film of a trilogy has got more cult followers than

you could imagine. Girls, women, men, boys and children flock to

see this movie. While some moments aren't as shockingly original

as they were back then, most of it is still scary and holds up well.

The film opens with our hopeless hero Ash, his girlfriend Linda,

his sister Cheryl and their friends Scott and Shelly heading off to a

deserted cabin in the woods supposedely for a weekend of fun

and games. However, what starts off as fun turns into terror with

the discovery of the 'Book of the Dead' in the cellar and the tree

rape attack of Cheryl (an amazing scene, by the way). With his

friends possessed, all Ash can do is kill them without mercy

beforeb he becomes the evil dead's next victim. Many people over

the years have complained about the violence but upon watching it

today, it seems surprisingly tame for an 80's horror picture. And

yes, I AM watching the UNCUT version. To me it doesn't seem as

shocking as it would have been twenty years ago. Bruce Campbell

is genius in his role as Ash. In this film, he plays Ash as a witty,

intelligent, good looking college student who likes to hang around

with his pals but in the next two, he would be a bumbling idiot who

gets hit on the head a lot. Here, Ash is a normal guy who finds

himself surrounded by dead incarnations of his friends and there

is a great look on his face around the middle of the film that says

perfectly "I'm all alone and surrounded by the living dead". A lot of

these character traits are thanks to Sam Raimi, writer and director,

who has wrote a genius script and directed it like a pro. He's even

created his own type of shot! For me, 'Evil Dead' is my least favorite

of the 'Evil Dead' trilogy with 'Army of Darkness' being my favorite

but that doesn't mean to say it's a bad film. It's a grim, disturbing,

humorous and violent look into the ultimate holiday gone wrong.

An absolute must see!

Austin Powers in Goldmember (2002)

The Best Austin Powers!

[3 January 2003]

After the amazingly funny 'Austin Powers' and the average 'The Spy Who Shagged Me', everyone was wondering what could Mike Myers do to keep it fresh. Well, he made a damn good film that's for sure. World famous super spy Austin Powers (Mike Myers) is living a happy life in 2002. He has defeated Dr. Evil (Mike Myers again), put him and Mini-Me (Verne Troyer) behind bars and he is to be knighted. Things go wrong when his father, Nigel Powers (Michael Caine)is absent at the knighting ceremony and kidnapped by Goldmember (Mike Myers' newest role, a freaky Dutch disco dancer in 1975. Austin travels back to save his father and teams up with the sexy Foxxy Cleopatra (Beyonce Knowles). Between all this, there are a pair of Japanese twin sisters called Fook Mi and Fook Yu, a dance number which helps Dr. Evil escape, a crazy Sumo scene involving Fat Bastard (Mike Myers yet again) and a submarine in the shape of Dr. Evil himself. 'Goldmember' is the best film in the Austin Powers series and one of the best comedies of 2002 full stop. Everything from Goldmember trying to explain who Austin's Fahza is to Foxxy communicating to Austin through a hilarious Nathan Lane, every joke is milked out of the Austin Powers phenomenon and it's worth every penny. This film had me in tears with laughters. I mean, the smallest things like the way Dr. Evil and Frau (Mindy Sterling) say 'ya!' to each other or the fact that Scott (Seth Green) is so evil he's losing his hair had me rolling about the floor in laughter. Few comedies reach the near perfect mark but 'Goldmember' is one of them. To be honest, I wouldn't mind seeing an 'Austin Powers 4' right now considering how good this is. In the previous film, Mini-Me's scenes felt somewhat unsettling but here he is original and amusing. It's pure genius this film and to try to sum that up would be hard. The only part that really lets you down is Britney Spears' cameo. They were obviously just casting her to get a bigger audience. At least she had a funny joke during the end credits. Jay Roach returns behind the camera in what is his funniest film yet, and that's counting 'Meet the Parents'. Mike Myers and Michael McCullers once again write the screenplay and it's a real zinger. With cameos from everyone to Tom Cruise to John Travolta, it's sure to entertain!

Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me (1999)

Great But A Bit Repetitive

[3 January 2003]

We last saw sexy spy Austin Powers (Mike Myers) with his beautiful wife Vanessa (Elizabeth Hurley) two years ago when the original ended. It's now 1999 and Austin discovers that his sexy wife is a fembot! After this, he then finds out that Dr. Evil (Mike Myers again) has returned to Earth and has built a time machine and even has a clone. One Difference: The clone is one eight his size. Dr. Evil names him Mini-Me (Verne Troyer). With the help of Number 2 (Robert Wagner, back from the dead after his horrible burning in the first film), Dr. Evil and Mini-Me travel back in time to 1969 where they steal Austin's mojo with the help of Fat Bastard (Mike Myers' newest role), a huge disgruntled Scottish guard who loves to eat babies. Powerless without his mojo, Austin travels back in time to 1969 to get it back from Dr. Evil and make him the sexy beast he once was. The only problem is that he falls desperately in love with beautiful Felicity Shagwell (Heather Graham) but because of the lack of mojo, he is not able to do anything with her. It's now essential that Austin retrieves his mojo stuck in the hands of the 1969 Dr. Evil gang which includes a young Number 2 (Rob Lowe, in a great performance). This film would be great if it wasn't for the amount of copying from the first films. The infamous 'Shh!' scene from the first one is now the 'Zip it!' scene. One of the biggest talks when this film was released was about how many jokes were taken from the first film. This is not really a bad thing but we were expecting something really original (Watch 2002's Goldmember to see what it should have been) sadly this film is more or less a remake. Still, it's good for some laughs: The chess scene, Mini-Me's introduction, any scene with Mindy Sterling as Frau and, of course, the ever so sexy Heather Graham as karate chopping 1969 agent Felicity Shagwell. Shagwell by name Shag-very-Well by reputation. A lot of the crew from the first film has returned here. Most prominent is Jay Roach who once again directs and does a fine job at it. While Mike Myers wrote solo in the first one, here he is equipped with a partner in the form of Michael McCullers who does a pretty good job. I might also point out that Myers now plays a third role here as... Fat Bastard! A hit or miss character, I found him hysterically funny and was glad he returned in 'Goldmember'! Verne Troyer does a good job as Mini-Me but there's just something about him that isn't right. Luckily, that is gone in the next film. Well, 'The Spy Who Shagged Me' is certainly a funny film but if you've seen the first film then you've seen all these jokes. Skip it and go straight to 'Goldmember'.

Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery (1997)

Groovy, Baby!

[3 January 2003]

There are few films that have made me laugh as hard as 'Austin Powers'. When released in 1997, it was the perfect comedy for our young hip MTV generation but didn't exactly light up the box office. It became a major hit on video and is now a fully fledged movie franchise and nothing is going to change that, baby! The plot follows cooler than cool 60's spy Austin Powers (Mike Myers) and his partner Mrs. Kensington (Mimi Rogers) who, in 1967, try to stop maniac Dr. Evil (Mike Myers again) from his plots to hold the world ransom. When Dr. Evil freezes himself in space Austin cryogenically freezes himself to be awoken when Dr. Evil returns. Cut to 30 years later and Dr. Evil has returned to Nevada with some terrorist plotting and there's only one man that can save the world: Austin Powers! The only problem is, when Austin is awoken, he finds the world of 1997 very hard to deal with and what's even harder is trying not to bed Mrs. Kensington's beautiful daughter Vanessa (Elizabeth Hurley) who seems immune to Austin's charm. The stuff that was cool and hip in the 60's aren't the same in 1997. Austin's bad teeth are no longer fashionable but are disgusting, his clothes are no longer groovy but embarassing and the whole age of the swinging 60's has been lost to Corporate America. Although not everyone will like this film, there is at least bits to please everyone. Dr. Evil's failing relationship with his test tube baby son played by Seth Green is pure genius and Robert Wagner as Number 2 and Mindy Sterling as Frau are two performances not to be missed. Of course, Mike Myers is sensational in his dual role as the hero and the villain. It's Austin's stupidity and Dr. Evil's loony escapades that really put this film together. Then we have Elizabeth Hurley as Vanessa, a surprisingly well developed love interest who carries her own through the movie. Mimi Rogers' cameo as her mother is quite amusing even if we she isn't as well developed as she should be. With cameo appearances by Tom Arnold (Freddy's Dead: The Final Nightmare), Carrie Fisher (Uh, Star Wars!) and Burt Bacarrach, the cast is sure to please most viewers. The script is a masterpiece slice of writing by star Mike Myers. Mainly inspired by his father, Mike put together this loving tribute to his old man. For a mad comedy (Althought not exactly a spoof) the script is surprisingly well written and put together and feels like a good film where not a second of celluloid is wasted. That has something, in part, to do with the direction of Jay Roach, who later directed 'Meet the Parents', who captures the feel of the 60's perfectly in the first 15 minutes then creates a very real 90's. He gives the movie it's mojo, man! So, that's pretty much all there is to say. Followed by the entertaining but lacking sequel 'The Spy Who Shagged Me' two years later in 1999 and then by the much superior 'Goldmember' in 2002.

Gremlins 2: The New Batch (1990)

This New Batch Is Certainly Entertaining

[3 January 2003]

It wasn't usual for a hit 1984 movie to spawn a sequel 6 years later but that was the case with 'Gremlins'. However, this film is one of the few sequels that rivals the original in terms of quality. 'Gremlins' was a horror comedy making fun of Suburban households and wreaking havoc on the town. It was a good piece of popcorn fun which elevated above most blockbusters because of it's sheer wit and darkness. The sequel is more played for laughs - In fact, it is almost a spoof of the first film. The final 20 minutes of the film is actually poor Gremlin mania. It has spoofs of everything from 'New York, New York' to Marilyn Monroe (The female Gremlin)to gangster films of the 50's to 'The Wizard of Oz'and so on. The good thing is the film doesn't just remake the first film. This film is totally different but with the same characters returning now ready for the attack. But last time the Gremlins invaded the picture perfect town of Kingston Falls now they plan to invade New York and Billy Peltzer (Zach Galligan) has until the night to save New York and possibly the world from the Gremlin threat. From the start which features an argument between Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck over who should be present for the main logo (Originally, an even funnier extended version of this animated scene was used but later dropped but you can check it out on the great DVD!) which has been specially written and animated by the recently deceased Chuck Jones, we are thrown into the Clamp building ran by Mr. Clamp (John Glover) and which almost completely is operated by special devices saving time, energy and money. This building is the setup for a bunch of great gags and the film succeeds on providing great entertainment but I still can't decide if I prefer this or the first one. It may lean more towards this. Featuring great scenes like the Bat Gremlin, the Smart Gremlin, the Girl Gremlin, the Electric Gremlin who is stuck forever to listen to horrible songs in a telephone and the secretary Gremlin who meets his demise in a shredder. It's the Gremlin's show here and there's no denying it! Chris Columbus' original script with shadows of horror and comedy is now taken over by Charlie Haas, proving the Gremlins can be the star of the show. Joe Dante returns to direct and does a very good job. Familiar faces will be seen in Zach Galligan, Phoebe Cates, Dick Miller and Keye Luke and new faces in the form of Christopher Lee and a cameo from Hulk Hogan (Or John Wayne, in the home video version). Well, this new batch is a great batch!

Gremlins (1984)

Puts You In The Christmas Spirit!

[3 January 2003]

'Gremlins' seemed to be marketed as a fun family comedy about little muppet - type creatures that invade a small town. I'm sure the parents who brought their kids to see this thought it would be a fun family night out. That's when angry parents started walking out of test screenings... 'Gremlins' features Gremlin blending, Gremlin microwaving, blood, guts, dog hanging by tree lights, weird bubbles on the Gremlin's backs with baby Gremlins hatching in them, fathers getting stuck in the family chimney and dying, a few somewhat grizzly human deaths and, oh, of course, the cutest creature on the Earth... being tortured. Yes, 'Gremlins' is not your average Christmas movie but for the sickest of minds, it's a must see! Mr. Peltzer (Hoyt Axton) is a scientist who creates less than perfect inventions. When away from home, he gets his son Billy (Zach Galligan) an early Christmas present: A cute furry creature named Gizmo (Voice of Howie Mandel) who seems to be the perfect pet but he has three important rules not to break: Don't expose him to bright light or sunlight which would kill him, don't get him wet in which case he would multiply and, most importantly, don't let him eat after midnight or else all hell will break loose. Yes, before we know it, slimy green creatures are invading the cosy town of Kingston Falls with their eyes set on Billy and Gizmo. It's up to Billy to stop the creatures, save the town and get the girl he loves (Phoebe Cates). I remember my sister subjected me to watching Gremlins when I was about 5 and I had nightmares all night but now it's high on my list of favorite films. It has a cast at it's best including Dick Miller and Judge Reinhold, a very dark humoured and mean yet hilarious script by Chris Columbus and expert fantasy directing by Joe Dante which sets you right in the mood from the opening credits then about 30 minutes into the film he throws it all in your film. Yes, 'Gremlins' is an almost flawless film let down by only a few over long sequences (The Gremlin Bar scene starts out great but descends into boredom) but that's all made up for with the hilariously dark Christmas Story from Phoebe Cates about her father's Christmas Eve surprise that didn't turn out as planned. The scene really caused a lot of controversy as did the now infamous kitchen scene which features Gremlins meeting their demise by butcher's knife, blender and, of course, microwave. Ladies and Gentleman, if this happened in 'Wonderful Life', the suicide would have been inevitable. Get ready for a different kind of Christmas movie!!!

For Your Eyes Only (1981)

A Great Bond Movie

[1 December 2002]

After the enjoyable fantastical set pieces of 'The Spy Who Loved

Me' and the all out gadgetry of 'Moonraker', the producers of the

James Bond films decided it was time to get more into reality with

their next film, 'For Your Eyes Only', a very enjoyable film. There is

no more Jaws style supervillains or hollowed out volcano lairs,

only sadistic serial killers, unsophisticated cars and James

Bond's own wits (ocassionaly as deadly as Q's gadgets). The film

starts off with James Bond (Roger Moore) visiting the grave of his

dead wife Tracy (a nod to 'On Her Majesty's Secret Service') who

was killed by presumed to be dead Bond villain Ernst Stravro

Blofeld (played by Telly Savalas in the movie Tracy was murdered

in). As Bond flies away in a helicopter it comes under the control of

Blofeld (John Hollis) but eventually Bond leads Blofeld to his final

demise. This serves as two things: a cool Bond opening and a

goodbye to the super villains and high tech gadgetry of previous

Bond films. This Bond film is real: Bond bleeds, people die,

villains murder and there are no gadgets or high tech Aston

Martins. I'm not saying that I don't love the cars and gadgetry of

Bond but once in a while it's nice to see a more sombre Bond.

Also, Moore is more serious in his role as Bond. I don't think the

Bond out of 'Moonraker' would have killed a villain by kicking his

car off a cliff. Speaking of cliffs, the climax of this movie has a

thrilling climb up a mountain where Bond is put in danger by a

hideously sadistic villain at the top. A thrilling Bond adventure

scene! I could go on and on about this Bond film but the important

thing is that it's fast, funny and thrilling. A great Saturday night Bond

film.

Halloween II (1981)

Not As Bad As Some Have Said

[28 November 2002]

Time has been unfair to 'Halloween 2', the entertaining and very

tense follow up to the original 'Halloween'. Some have said this

film is slow, stupid and long. It isn't really, sure there are some

slow moments, the deaths can be a little too extravagant and there

is literally dozens of plot holes but the film is still frightening and

very suspensful, sometimes more so than the original. The film

begins at the climax of 'Halloween' where Michael Myers, a serial

killer just escaped from the asylum, is shot off a balcony but

dissapears. Psychiatrist Doctor Loomis (Donald Pleasance in his

greatest role besides Blofeld) goes in search of him while near

dead victim Laurie Strode (Jamie Lee Curtis) is taken to a very

empty hospital. All is not well though, Michael is still loose and very

quickly he has murdered his next victim and once again escaped.

Meanwhile, Laurie is lying in hospital, knowing that MIchael is after

her and is soon to learn a worse secret: Michael Myers is her

brother and when their parents died, Laurie, only a baby at the

sime, was adopted by the Strode family. A very 'Star Wars'-esque

state of events indeed but their is "force" in this movie. Myers is a

pure killing machine with no emotions and clearly enjoys his

sadistic escapades very much in this film and later in 'Halloween

4'. Some people may think of the 'Halloween' series as just your

normal slasher films, they are beginning to turn into that with the

release of 'Halloween 8' but all 8 of them are still quite fun but the

first four are the best, with plenty of MIchael Myers and the

Myer-less 'Halloween 3: The Season of the Witch' is not as bad as

everyone has said, at least not in my opinion. Meanwhile,

'Halloween 2' is still a good film. The directing by Rick Rosenthal

is alright but it's the segments specially shot by John Carpenter

that really ties the film together and the script, while sloppy in

places is very enjoyable. One thing a lot of people agree on about

this film is that Dick Warlock is the best Michael Myers. The walk,

the mask, those haunting eyes... Warlock has captured everything

brilliantly and it saves some of the weaker parts of the film.

Warlock also appears as Patrolman 3 but I've never figured out

which one that is! Anyway, 'Halloween 2' is a contreversial but

entertaining little sequel which survives mainly because of Curtis,

Pleasance and Warlock. I hope 'Halloween' continues for years to

come...

Goldfinger (1964)

The Best 007 Film

[15 November 2002]

I've not seen all of the Bond films. In fact, I never really used to like Bond. It's supposed to be excellent action entertainment with beautiful girls but all I saw were overlong boring adventures with long boring talking scenes and not enough action. My opinion has changed greatly. With all the hype surrounding 'Die Another Day', I decided to give Bond another go and I rented 'Goldfinger'. I was not dissapointed. Quite recently, I rented 'From Russia With Love' but was somewhat dissapointed. It wasn't the "best bond film" as many have said but it was relatively entertaining. I've seen some other Bond films in the past few years but at least for now, 'Goldfinger' is my favorite 007 film, with 'On Her Majesty's Secret Service' coming in a close second (In fact, George Lazenby is my favorite Bond and if he was in this film then I would have my dream Bond film). The plot of this film once again features agent 007 James Bond (Sean Connery) who is assigned to find out about Auric Goldfinger (Gert Frobe) a man intent on smuggling gold but finds out that Goldfinger is actually going to rob the enourmas Fort Knox of it's gold with the help of his henchman Odd Job (Harold Sakata) and Pussy Galore (Honor Blackman). What follows is a story filled with sex, violence, action, a strong as a post henchman, the coolest car ever to see the light of day, a lesbian called Pussy Galore and a hat that decapitates people. Just a normal day for James Bond, then, isn't it? Which brings us to the man himself, James Bond! Sean Connery, in my opinion, isn't the best James Bond but here he brings that certain presence to the screen that everyone, male and female, will love. He's just amazing in the role but, luckily, all the co-stars are strong actors as well. Gert Frobe is very convincing in his role as the millionaire maniac Goldfinger but it's his henchman Odd Job played by Harold Sakata who steals the show with his hat-throwing and golf ball-crushing. Then, of course, we have the Bond Girl with "that" name: Pussy Galore. Honor Blackman is great as the Bond girl even if her role is a little too small compared to later Bond girls. Of course the co-Bond girl is Shirley Eaton in the role that sees her painted gold and killed which is the image most associated with this film. Very impressive. Of course, a Bond film wouldn't be a Bond film without the gadgets. This film features the Aston Martin, another image always associated with James Bond films. This car features a whole load of features sure to get rid of the bad guys if Bond has any problems and is responsible for some of the best scenes in the movies. Overall, 'Goldfinger' is a very impressive Bond film and a very impressive action film on it's own. This film is near perfect, from the gunbarrel opening and the Connery's "shocking" line to the gold paint to the golf scene to Pussy Galore to the amazing raid on Fort Knox, nothing about this film could really do better. If you're looking for "the" Bond film, look no further than 'Goldfinger'!

The Shrink Is In (2001)

An Incredibly Fun Movie

[14 November 2002]

To me, 'The Shrink Is In' represented everything a flop had to offer. A newly wed couple doing a film together, a film that sits on the shelf for a couple of years then finding a copy of it at my local blockbuster. Surprisingly, it's a really great film worthy of repeat viewings. Everyone works hard in their roles and bring their all to it and it works! If it was released in cinemas, it could be a hugely succesful romantic comedy, I think. It has all the right ingredients too: A succesful TV star giving a great performance, her less known husband exceeding in his excellent role in every scene he's in, a strong suppoerting cast of unkown names but recognisable faces including Carol Kane, David James Elliot, Kimberley Davies and Viola Davis. The script and direction are impressive also, although both could have been improved on a little. I also felt that a lot was cut out of the script leaving a lot of loose ends to be tied. To be honest, I don't think you need a plot when the film itself is so much fun but, for those who care, the film is about Samantha (Courteney Cox), a good hearted girl who's been afraid of everything from elevators to crowded places after she was dumped by her boyfriend. When her shrink collapses, she privately takes up her jobonly to find herself getting romantically involved with a shy magazine salesman, Henry (David Arquette) while at the sametime being wooed by her neighbor who's in a relationship with french stoner bimbo who likes to be taken behind "like a farm animal". Not only that, but she's also illegally impersonating her shrink, something she knows won't end up good. Even more so when the real shrink, Dr. Rosenberg (Carol Kane) is starting to rehabilitate. This film is nothing but a good natured fun romp through this woman's romantic life and whileit may be predictable at times, it's just fun! All the actors seem to be having fun which keeps the film on a good tone throughout, excellent for repeat viewings. One great blink ands you miss it performance is Carol Kane as the shrink, especially in her breakdown scenes. The directing by Richard Benjamin works quite well even if he makes the occasional blunder here and there. The script is very enjoyable, but like I said I definitely think the film had a lot of stuff cut. Hopefully, when the filmmakers and public realise that a really great film is stuck nowhere, they will give it a special edition, with the deleted scenes.

Halloween (1978)

Halloween: The Ultimate Terror Film Creation

[14 November 2002]

Today, some may look down on it as a horrible slasher film piece of shlock made in the seventies oozing with teenage sex and violence. They couldn't be more wrong. 'Halloween' (1978) did begin countless slasher films dripping with countless teenage sex scenes and even more violent scenes involving horrible dialogue with one dimensional cardboard cut out stock characters. In every slasher film, it was the same: The big breasted bimbo, the jock, the joker, the stoned out character, the easy-to-kill black character the obvious virginal heroine and her suave sophistichated boyfriend (Although not all had one) who would also be killed off quick. The original thing about this film is that it had all these characters before they became the norm. Back then, it was truly suspensful. Of course, 'Halloween' still rises above the imitators either way, mainly because this one is a truly scary piece of psychological terror that gets even better with multiple viewings, as I discovered recently when I bought it in the 'Halloween: Ultimate Collection' DVD box set. The film begins with a different kind of opening credits. It features an evil, smiling pumpkin which the camera closes up to as the ever so memorable 'Halloween' theme tune runs on. After these credits quickly finish, we find ourselves in the POV of an unkown character outside a house. It's 1963 and we move around the house, eventually killing a young girl called Judith Myers who screams "Michael!" at us. At the end of this long shot the mask is pulled off us by Michael Myer's parents. Michael is 6 years old and has just killed his sister. Cut to 15 years later, Dr. Loomis (Donald Pleasence) is travelling to MIchael Myer's trial with his assistant Marion (Nancy Stephens) when Michael breaks out of his asylum and steals their car. His mission is to travel to his hometown of Haddonfield to kill a small town babysitter Laurie Strode (Jamie Lee Curtis, in her first role). The story is simple, I could give more plot points and character names but there is no point to that. The plot and characters are simple. 'Halloween' is meant as a very scary piece of fun and it succeeds on those counts. It's harmless fun yet it will have you jumping miles out of your seat but director John Carpenter does not rely on jump scares all the time. Most of the time, he builds suspense usually with his own haunting score. The film will have you on the edge of your seat more times than jumping out of it. The film's killer, Michael Myers' walks around slowly and patiently wearing a chalk white human face mask with sticky out hair. Michael is a one of a kind villain. Expertly written by Carpenter and Debra Hill and directed by Carpenter, his stalking scenes go up there with famous scenes like the shower scene in 'Psycho' or the any part of 'The Texas Chainsaw Massacre'. But the person you have to thank most for those scares is Michael Myers himself, Nick Castle. An all-round nice guy who was cast as the killer because Carpenter saw a "dark side", Castle manages to play Michael in the right frame of mind with the right mood, building some of the best scares in the movies. It is he you have to truly thank for the role. For people who may not know this, an interesting fact is that during the unmasking scene of Michael, it is not Castle's face behind the mask but that of Tony Moran. The rest of the cast also deserve some sort of medal for their roles. Jamie Lee Curtis, Nancy Loomis and PJ Soles are all excellent as the trio of giggling girls. Donald Pleasance is absolutely brilliant (and completely essential) in his role as Sam Loomis, he really excells in the role. A nice thing to see. Charles Cyphers is pretty impressive in his role as the disbelieving sherrif of Haddonfield, not happy that Loomis is spreading his small happy town with horrible rumours. The camerawork and overall style of the movie is nicely done by Carpenter and makes it essential for repeat viewings, so you can see stuff you missed. I could rave on and on about this movie but I'll finish up by saying that 'Halloween' is essential viewing. It is the father of all horror films and Myers is the father of all serial killers. Go see it.

Mondo Trasho (1969)

Hail John Waters For Giving Us This

[25 September 2002]

All of John Water's films have their quirks and their staying power and each one is truly a beautiful piece of art but nothing comes close to "Mondo Trasho", John's earlier trash epic. Not only does it have a faster pace than some of his other films but the "story" keeps on coming with more and mnore drug induced imagery. Divine, John Water's regular performer, delivers an hilarious over the top performance as a gum chewing trashy splendor, driving about looking for men until she is distracted by a nude hitcher and runs over an un-named fashion fanatic played by Mary Vivian Pearce. In the course of the next 24 hours, they go through a variety of different adventues, each one unique. This film boasts some great performances by the likes of Mink Stole, David Lochary, Divine and Mary Vivian Pearce. The film also features a great soundtrack, comprised of hundreds of John Water's favorite tunes. No good tune is left untouched in this trash epic. The film is definitely a more mild one than, say, "Pink Flamingos", meaning that this film doesn't have a lot of gross acts although it does have chickens being killed for real and toe sucking. This John Waters film is definitely one of his most unkown and one of his best.

Rushmore (1998)

A Very Fine Film

[29 August 2002]

No film is more true to the term "you either love it or hate it" than

'Rushmore'. These days, everyone says a film is a 'Love it or Hate

it' affair but only in 'Rushmore's case is it completely true. By

reading the reviews here on IMDB or anywhere for that matter,

people either love this film and think it's a true classic or hate it

and can't seem to figure out what the fuss is all about it. I love it

and think it's an absolutely fine film. This film has a brilliant script

by the genuis Owen Wilson and Wes Anderson team and the

directing by Anderson is, quite simply, amazing. Combining

everything from French new wave to sophisticated (Read:

pretentious) art film.

The story follows Max Fischer (Jason Schwartzman), a very smart

student who takes up most of his time writing plays instead of

studying and listening in class. One day, he hears a speech from

Herman Blume (Bill Murray, in his best performance since

'Caddyshack') and becomes obsessed with this Blume person,

someone very similar to himself. Herman Blume is a very wealthy

man but obviously realized that money doesn't buy happiness. His

two kids, Ronny (Ronnie McCawley) and Donny (Keith McCawley)

hate him and his Wife (Kim Terry) hardly talks to him anymore.

Through a series of events, Max eventually finds himself in love

with a teacher Mrs. Cross (Olivia Williams). Soon, Herman Blume

falls in love with her too and Max and Blume finds themselves in a

friendly rivarly between each other.

What I love from this film is the way it seems so... messed

around. There is a plot but it seems to go in completely different

direction and from the outside, looks, well, just like these bunch of

related topics. Letters, Hand Jobs, Plays and Barbers all seem to

be messed around and some parts, like the hand job parts, are

like a totally unrelated topic that relates to the plot. It's very hard to

say in writing and would be easier if I was talking directly to you.

Letters also play a big part and that leads me to another thing I

wanted to mention. When Blume walks up to Miss Cross when

she and the class are outside painting and gives her the letter

from Max. We cut away to a close up of "Dear Miss Cross" on the

letter and we hear Max's voice reading it. We then cut back to Miss

Cross and Blume as Max continues reading. It's these little things,

like the editing, that make this brilliant. It's also a sort of art film

technique that they used.

The acting adds a lot to this film. Jason Schwartzman and Bill

Murray absolutely shine in their roles as friendly rivals Max Fischer

and Herman Blume. Olivia Williams is very convincing in the role of

Rosemary Cross, the teacher that Max and Herman are fighting

over. Brian Cox, Seymour Cassel, Stephen McCole, Mason Gable

and and Luke Wilson all steal the scenes they are in as the

co-stars of this film.

Well, you either love this film or hate it. Either way, go to it with an

open mind and you'll find out what you think of it soon after...

Bottle Rocket (1993)

Enjoyable, If Flawed, Short

[29 August 2002]

I'm a big fan of the Wes Anderson/Owen Wilson team. I saw

Rushmore only a few months ago for the first time, after hearing

about it for years, and loved it. Only two nights ago, I rented 'The

Royal Tenenbaums' from Blockbuster and thought it was really

good. Yet, I still haven't seen the full length 'Bottle Rocket'. I've only

seen this short that inspired it soon after i first saw 'Rushmore'.

This a very original and enjoyable short, although the pop culture

talk at the start seems somewhat dated since we've now seen it in

everything from Kevin Smith's 'Clerks' (Not to mention all his other

films) to Quentin Tarantino's 'Pulp Fiction'. The short does contain

a nice share of laughs, mostly involving Dignan, although I can

never really figure out why it got picked to be made into a feature.

Don't get me wrong, I love Wes Anderson and I thought this short

was really good but I know if I saw it, the first thought on my mind

wouldn't be to make it into a feature. I still haven't saw the feature,

although I've read a few select parts of the script and it looks funny.

I think the acting in this short was rather bad but I guess it just

adds to the charm of a 13 minute black and white short, doesn't it?

All in all, it's a short that doesn't have a lot of replay value but is

watchable the first time and good none the less.

State and Main (2000)

Lovable Light Hearted Comedy from Mamet

[28 August 2002]

State and Main is, for me, a near perfect movie. It's sweet without

being too sappy. It can be mean without being too offensive

(Although offensive movies don't bother me at all) and, to top it all

off, Phillip Seymour Hoffman is in it. What more could you ask for

in a film? I couldn't ask for a lot more, i know that. The plot is quite

well developed and well written following the adventures of a big

budget Hollywood team crashing into the small town in Waterford,

Vermont to film their movie "The Old Mill" only to find that their main

location, the old mill, burned down in 1960. The crew has to deal

with this and a whole variety of other problems that come along.

Especially their star Bob Barrenger (Alec Baldwin, in a fantastic

performance) having an affair with local under-age resident Carla

(Julia Stiles). In the three days leading up to the first day of

shooting we experience happiness, sadness, craziness and car

crashes. By the end of the movie, the entire cast and crew have

learnt a lesson, even if all of them aren't as good as they could be.

The writing and directing by David Mamet is the stuff of legends.

Hilarious quotes come in a furious pace in an accomplished script

that has a lot going for it. The directing by Mamet also holds his

usual "style" he's so famous for. The acting is, well, superb!

Everybody from Julia Stiles to William H. Macy to Sarah Jessica

Parker juice all they can from the script and their performances are

all accomplished. Despite the fact that it has a lot of characters,

you never find yourself confused or annoyed by the amount. It's just

perfect. It manages to be everything from razor sharp true to life

Hollywood satire to screwball comedy. Final word, go get it!

Family Guy (1999– )

An Absolutuely Amazing TV Show

[26 August 2002]

If there's one show that i could watch for 24 hours without food,

water or toilet, this is it! The adventures of the animated Griffin

family is the smartest and funniest show ever to be cancelled

(Although, Futurama was pretty good). Family Guy follows the

usually sureal and over the top adventures of the Griffin family.

Peter Griffin is the father. He's stupid, vulgar, stupid, vulgar and, oh

yeah, stupid. But deep down in his bowels- I mean! His heart, he

loves his family like any other person. Louis Griffin is his loving

wife. She was a millionaire until she met Peter, who was a simple

towel boy. They fell in love and she gave up the millions to quietly

live in Rhode Island with him. They have a daughter Meg Griffin,

16, who's real care is to fit in with the crowd at school. Sadly, with a

family like the Griffins, that's pretty hard to do. Their son, at the age

of 13, is named Chris, an overweight boy who's just discovering

woman. Unlike a lot of teenagers in this type of show, he's isn't a

bad boy, he's sweet hearted and just tries to do good. In fact, he

has some pretty good talents, like his ability to draw. Next up, is

baby Stewie, a one year old who wants only one thing- Complete

and total world domination. In fact, he would be pretty good at it if

he wasn't a baby. Not one member of the family seems to realize

that Stewie is evil. Last, but not least, is Brian, the family dog, who

is the most well educated member of the family and seems to

know what's going on with everyone at every moment. This family

endures everything you can imagine. I don't think there's been one

dull day in their lives. And there's not one dull episode. From the

start, Family Guy sets itself out to be a crude foul mouthed and

crazy pop culture reference filled TV show that is actually pretty

smart. The least i can say is that it's acheived it's goal. It is brilliant

and has more laughs in one episode than a stand up comedian

has in 100 shows. Some people may find it offensive, and it's

definitely not a show for everyone, but it does speak some very

important messages sometimes, albeit through a very crude joke.

Of course, this review wouldn't be complete without touching on

The Simpsons. Every time an animated show comes on air,

comparaisons are inevitable. In my opinion, they are two different

shows. Sure, Simpsons and Family Guy are both about two

dysfunctional families with the same type of father but there's a lot

of families like that in real life. Do you go around comparing them?

I know i don't. Family Guy is much more surreal and cruder than

The Simpsons. The Simpsons is a TV show that any age can

enjoy but Famly Guy is a show a father and a teenage son can

have a good laugh at. To finish this review off, I would like to

mention that it was only when i went on IMDB yesterday that i saw

this showe had been cancelled. One Word: Wrong.

Hairspray (1988)

A Rockin' Good Time

[22 August 2002]

John Waters: His name is mostly associated with the notorious

'Pink Flamingos'. A film that featured people having sex with

chickens for real, a 375 pound drag queen eating dog feces for

real, a man opening and closing his, well, his hole where the sun

don't shine, for real and even more perverted stuff happens in that

NC-17 film. After three more brilliant films and a seven year

absence, John smashed on to the scene again with a film that

was, believe it or not, rated PG. A first (And so far a last, Cry Baby

was PG-13) for John and his films.

Tracy Turnblad (Ricki Lake, in her first performance) and her friend

Penny Pingleton (Leslie Ann Powers) want to do nothing but watch

'The Corny Collins Show' based on a real TV show John used to

watch when he was a kid in Baltimore (It was called 'The Buddy

Deane Show'). They watch this every day after school much to the

disagreement of Tracy's mother, Edna (Divine, known for eating

dog feces for real in 'Pink Flamingos). One day, Tracy auditions for

the show and is soon appearing on it daily and is a favorite of the

public, and a role model for fat girls everywhere.

Of course, this is barely a plot, the real plot is about Tracy's attempt

to integrate the show. You see, back in those days, adults

everywhere were racists. They may have listened to black music

on 'Corny Collins' and in real life with 'Buddy DEane', but any black

and white people together was considered disgusting. It's kind of

sad to think that was how it really was in 1962.

Of course, this film is not 'Pink Flamingos' at all, this is a little girl's

movie, but a good one at that. John Waters does some excellent

stuff with the talent he's got and everything in this film is near

perfect making it an excellent film to watch alone or with your

family. Give it a shot, it's fun!

9/10

The Player (1992)

An Unpredictable Film

[16 August 2002]

When i first saw this film, i was blown away. The film was nothing like i had expected. From the poster and from reviews here on IMDB and the summary on the front page, i expected a real satire on Hollywood with a bunch of hilarious celebrity cameos and lots of in-jokes. I was pleasantly surprised when i first saw the film because it was so different. Hollywood is hardly a big part in the plot and most of the film is more like a dark comedy drama with hints of romance than the laugh-out-loud cameo machine I thought it would be. Another surprising thing was the fact that it was a very independant film, something i hadn't expected. Don't let any of this put you off, the film is simply amazing and should be seen by anyone interested in the Hollywood filmmaking life.

Tim Robbins plays Griffin Mill, a studio exec whose job is to hear pitches from various writers (Ideas like "The Graduate Part 2") and pick the best ones. Those ideas will eventually become Hollywood movies. Griffin's career already seems to be going badly when he starts getting angry and abusive letters from a writer who he rejected. Griffin is obviously scared so when he finally decides that it's been enough, he tries to find the writer who is sending him these messages.

He comes across the name of David Kahane (Vincent D'Onofrio) and goes to his house to confront him. David isn't home but his girlfriend June (Gretta Scacchi) is and an amazing scene ensues where Griffin talks to her on a mobile phone while looking through the windows. June is oblivious to the fact that the person talking to her on the phone is only a few feet away looking through the window. Griffin later finds out that David is at a theater seeing a showing of "The Bicycle Thief". Once the film is over, Griffin confronts David in an alley where a fight ensues. Eventually, Griffin accidently kills David. Scared and paranoid, Griffin runs from the scene after changing some stuff at the crime scene to make it look like a robbery. Perfect, it could never come back to him. But it does and then the messages start coming again. If that's not enough, Griffin is slowly falling in love with June, David's girlfriend.

The rest of the film deals with Griffin's fight to keep his position at the studio and to try and not become a major suspect for the death of David. A subplot deals with a film pitched to Griffin by Tom Oakley (Richard E. Grant) that is "real" and not some Hollywood drivel. Throughout the course of the film, we have scenes dealing with the making of this film.

I still find this film amazing. It is very smart but not too much for it's own good. The performances are all brilliant with Whoopi Goldberg stealing the show as a hard boiled, foul mouthed detective.s film is mostly known for the famous eight minute tracking shot at the beginning of the movie. It follows various people around the studio as they live their normal Hollywood big-shot lives. It is a beautiful, amazingly shot scene that should go down in the amazing moments of masterful cinema.

The good thing about the many celebrity cameos that litter the film is that they never steal the show or drive the film away from the main plot. The cameos are amazing though. There are some that last less than a minute and there are some that last less than ten seconds (Susan Sarandon, for instance, has a very small cameo role near the end of the film) but they all shine in their roles.

The writing by Michael Tolkien based on his own novel (Which i have not read but will very soon) is masterful and he writes each of the characters as if they were real people (Albeit real HOLLYWOOD people) and no character seemed far fetched or unrealistic. It definitely adds to the grittiness of the film and it's characters. The directing by Robert Altman only adds to Michael Tolkien's amazing writing. Altman knows how to direct a film no matter what it's like and this film is one of his films he should be remembered by (Next to MASH, Nashville and Short Cuts).

All in all, this film deserves the cult status it has received even if it does take some repeat viewings to get used to.

By the way, on the excellent audio commentary to the DVD, Michael Tolkien mentions that he made a pilot for a "Player" TV series. I'm guessing that the series never happened but does anyone have any info on the pilot? If you do, please send me a message through IMDB.

The Odd Couple (1968)

A Comedic Masterpiece - Should Be Remember For Years to Come

[16 August 2002]

I never knew that a film could be this funny. I remember hearing so

much about the film, the play and the TV series (My father is a

huge fan). One Christmas, while i was on vacation at a relative's

house, i was shouted into the house because 'The Odd Couple'

was on. I quickly dug out a tape and recorded it. I'll never regret

taping over the film that was previously on that tape. This film

seems to fly by like it's only on for ten minutes. The performances

were amazing and hilarious. The writing, the directing, the

cinematography, the sets, the famous theme tune etc... It was all

amazing! I love to brag on about films and i would do this on this

film but if i start i wouldn't be able to stop and eventually i wouldn't

be able to write anymore due to the fact that IMDB has a limit of

1000 words for reviews. Anyway, just go and see this film. No

matter what format or what quality, just get it!

Pecker (1998)

It Tickled My Pecker-Bone

[15 August 2002]

This was the first John Waters movie i ever saw so i look at it

fondly. It still holds up well today. Pecker is a young photographer in Baltimore who takes pictures of

just about anything he can see which include his loving

laundromat girlfriend, his grandmother who believes her Virgin

Mary statue can talk, his suger-obsessed little sister and his

anti-pubic hair and alcohol father. One day, when he shows his

artwork at the place he works, a New York art dealer shows up and

asks him if she can show his work at a top-class art gallery in New

York. The rest of the film deals with Pecker's new found fame as

New York's biggest photographer. The best part of this film is the continous satire of the New York art

world, almost definitely inspired by John Water's early career in the

movies and his later career being a photographer. For example,

back in the sixties, he would play his short films at small cafes in

Baltimore just like Pecker showed his artwork in the sub shop.

Also, the opening credits which are somewhat shaky are inspired

by the fact that when John showed his early films, the projector

would always shake and make the picture move. Of course, no John Waters film is complete without either

over-the-top or excellent acting and this film has a bit of both.

Christina Ricci manages to blend both of them together in the best

role of her career as a neurotic laundromat owner. Ed Furlong is

perfect as the sympathetic Pecker. Brendan Sexton steals the

show(And some stuff in a supermarket) as Pecker's best friend

Matt, a chronic thief. Another highlight performance is that of

Martha Plimton as Tina, Pecker's older sister, who works at a

downtown Gay bar in Baltimore. The list goes on and on... In my opinion, this is one of John's best of his later career and is a

definite must to catch one time. See ya' later, Mary!

Cannibal! The Musical (1993)

Uneven yet Hilarious Film

[14 August 2002]

This is an early effort from 'South Park' creators Trey Parker and

Matt Stone which is based on a mock trailer they did in film school

called 'Alferd Packer! The Musical. This film was very uneven and

had some long and unnecessary scenes but the crazy songs and

some of the more memorable lings more than make up for that.

You can see from some of the scenes that this film was made on

a low budget and obviously is hardly perfect. It is still a brilliant

film(Not better than Trey and Matt's best film, though, which was

'BASEketball') with some rather funny songs(My favorite being 'The

Trapper Song'). Overall, a very enjoyable effort from the South Park

and Troma team.

Polyester (1981)

Smells Good!!!

[14 August 2002]

I had heard so much about this film that i was ecstatic to finally watch it. I thought it was brilliant and of Water's best. But it still took me a while to get to that conclusion. A lot of reviews and even the theatrical trailer lead you to believe the main plot is about Todd Tomorrow and Francine's relationship whereas that doesn't really come in until about the last 25 minutes(literally!). Still, i really enjoyed the performances, writing, acting, and the famed gimmick. Francine Fishpaw(Divine, in his best performance) is a suffering housewife. Her daughter is having an abortion, her son is a glue-sniffing foot stomper and her husband is a cheating porno theater owner. The only good thing in her life is her darling friend Cuddles(Edith Massey, in a memorable final performance) who recently inherited a lot of money and is now a millionaire. The film deals with all of Francine's problems including her disgusting husband who is constantly playing pranks on Francine with his slut secretary(John Waters regular Mink Stole, in a scene stealing performance) and the porno picketeers who stay outside. Francine also has a rather unlucky smelling sense and can smell stuff(mostly bad stuff) from almost miles away. Of course, these smells are dealt with by the infamous 'Odorama' card(I'd love to see Waters' use this more in other films) which can sometimes be quite repellant. The acting of this film was quite fabulous. Divine, Edith Massey and Mink Stole are all brilliant with co-stars also giving their memorable contributions. Tab Hunter is intentionally cheesy and over the top as Todd Tomorrow and it works! Of course, the scene where Francine and Todd meet at a car accident scene is one of the best scenes in the movie and should be remembered for years to come(Especially for the new car smell, one of the few good smells in the movie). All in all, this is one of Waters best despite the story somewhat falling apart in the end(Even John Waters admits "One more rewrite wouldn't have hurt" in the DVD commentary).

Female Trouble (1974)

Crime is Beauty *SPOILERS*

[13 August 2002]

Dawn Davenport(Divine) is the worst girl in school. She does

horrible on tests, smokes in the bathroom and eats meatball

sandwiches(Yum!) in class. But all Dawn really wants is to get her

beloved cha-cha heels for Christmas but her parents seem to

think otherwise so she attacks them and pins her mother under

the Christmas Tree. She then proceeds to run away from home

and is picked up by a greasy slob called Earl(Also played by

Divine) who takes her and has sex with her on the side of the road.

Dawn then becomes pergant with the very bitchy Taffy and lives a

life of crime with fascist beauty parlour owners the Dashers(Mary

Vivian Pearce and David Lochary) until eventually being sentenced

to death in the electric chair. An amazing finale to an amazing film. I can never really decide if this is John Waters' best movie but it

definitely is a highlight in his career. The performances by Divine,

Edith Massey, Mink Stole and Lochary and Pearce are sensational

and oscar worthy. If only there could be a spin-off made about all of

them but since most of them are dead, it really isn't in the cards.

Divine really steals the Dawn Davenport, but as Earl, the greasy

ugly slob who picks up Dawn on the street. I would have loved to

see more of Earl in the film especially scenes where Earl and

Dawn interact. Divine proved in this film that he was capable of

being more than a drag queen. He could also play brilliant male

roles as well(He got the chance to play another male role in

Hairspray shortly before he died). Overall, this was a worthy effort

by all involved and the director's cut recently released on DVD let's

us see John Water's original vision of his classic film.