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Reviews
Silo (2023)
Dystopian Marmite
No spoilers here. Actually there's not much to spoil after 5 episodes.
Easy to see why some like it and some loath this new, different yet completely standard sci fi mystery show.
Acting is average, I'm sadly now fixated on the very mixed accent of Ferguson just as much as the plot and not sure if i can keep going.
Some things just don't make sense about the show like the 'stuff' they have , the mixture of accents and a bit of modern slang whilst some language, names, knowledge is completely gone and something pops up every episode that just leaves you thinking 'really? Why have they written than and left it in'
lots happens without much really actually happening and yes, the pace is slow. Yes the first episode and 2nd are way better than the next 3.
Feels a little like it's going to get LOST in an overly convoluted plot down the line if it does have multiple series.
My advice - if you like easy going Saturday eve TV that is ok for the family then go for it, it's fine.
If you love good sci fi, if you loved Severance, Dark, The OA, even Homecoming then this isn't up to scratch. This is closer in quality to Fallen Skies, Colony, that Dome show.... But don't take my advice, i may just carry on watching and they may just pull it back in line....
A Haunting on Dice Road: The Hell House (2016)
not a documentary
If you are looking for a doc don't look here. Interesting story spoiled by hokey crap and cgi you see in a lot of crap 'haunting' series'.
I'm open minded but it's this type of tripe that makes people closed off toward anything supernatural. Wasn't even sure if it was a complete spoof or not.
Sad because if the story is genuine including lots of police involvement etc then this could and should be really interesting but the direction is poor, the constant night vision, the very predictably placed 'jumps' from the visitor just made it a bit uncomfortable to watch.
I don't mind all of this fun rubbish, it just shouldn't be classified as a doc because it's not, it's just entertainment for those who like 'most haunted' or other faux paranormal shows.
Children of the Corn (2020)
possibly the worst film i've ever seen.
Do i even have to give 1?? Please don't waste your time. If you are a fan of the original don't bother, if you haven't seen the original please watch it. The original is corny and crap in all the right ways.
This is absolutely nothing, no plot, no script, no acting, bad edits , nothing, just nothing . The first hour was so poorly directed i thought i was missing something. It's just shocking in all the wrong ways. Don't watch , don't waste those precious minutes of your life.
The trailer is a complete catfish - and anyone who gives this more than one star really has no clue and that's not normally something i say.
It's bad. And not in a good way. Avoid.
Last Survivors (2021)
it's a no from me.
What was all the music about?? Absolutely spoiled the film and made it feel like a Sunday afternoon stroll and this should have been a thriller.
Odd all round and absolutely didn't know what it wanted to be. I won't waste too much time on this but stuck with it despite almost hitting stop after 5 minutes. Silverstone is good but it's just a pretty rubbish film which is unfortunate as the concept/plot if carried out well could have made for a good watch.
The script was bizarre at times running off a slushy tangent about the beauty of nature and almost unbearable.
Really obvious and poor. One of these stars is purely as i like trees and snow.
The Happening (2008)
So bad it's almost good.
Modern classic of a B movie - accept the bad science, the bad editing, the shocking scrips, the really bad acting, the lack of drama, lack of any connection to any character and most other parts of the film and it's amazing!
The usual M NIght feel to it which makes it watcheable and some of whalbergs delivery of line is something to be marvelled at but the cop out ending is just perfect.
But it's almost believable and let's face it,, we kind of all want it..... don't we?
Dune (2021)
Style over Substance.
Pretty good and years since I watched the original but for me missing the mark somehow and felt a little like in making this into a franchise meant they'd stretched out this initial segment and for me i didn't feel ready for it to end there.
I liked the style, cinematography, tones etc but it was a complete case of style over substance, each scene reminiscent of Givenchy or Prada ad and very glossy and commercial.
Performance all were decent, wasn't a fan of the cliche baddy of Stellan Skarsgard, just a bit too obvious.
Overall i mostly enjoyed it and will watch the 2nd hoping it either picks up pace or just creates a bit more of a connection with me. I love a slow burner but just wanted a bit more from
it and expected it from the hype.
Old (2021)
one of the worst films i've seen in a while.
Dull, lazy, empty - basically an idea of a film extremely poorly written and executed. I've seen similar story lines in other films and tv shows like the x files but you'd expect more or maybe these days you wouldn't from MNS.
I don't think i ever really hit a point where i wasn't thinking about maybe turning it off. Watch to the end and the 'twist' wasn't really a twist and there was no rea drama. Also characters being offed every 2 mins meant you connected to no one at all.
And now i'm even wasting my time with a review ...
- the 3 stars is for the concept, not the film.
Mother/Android (2021)
Pretty Rubbish
Thought it had enough to possibly have been decent but alas, it's wasn't.
Very slow and i like a slow burner but it didn't have enough of anything to pull you through. Production i thought was ok, Chloe GM was fine and watchable and i kind of liked the non standard ending but the rest was very standard and did feel a bit like a tv show.
I'm not sure what else to say but it was instantly forgettable like 90% of apocalyptic films from the past 5 years. A dud.
Mud (2012)
Really Good
No spoilers so i won't go in to much detail.
One one level a little bit simple and a pretty grim portrait of Arkansas folk, i've seen a couple of grumbles but the pace is good, it's not a complete slow burner, it's a thriller and a drama and both elements are good and all because the performances for everyone of the cast are top notch.
The ending could go either way due to how the film is set out and a bittersweet ending is always in the offing but it does well to keep your attention and wondering.
In a decade of ever growing violence, gore, CGI and and quick thrills this film deserves its plaudits, it's just very well made. Not complex enough to make 9 or 10 stars but is well above average.
The Matrix Resurrections (2021)
another sad sequal.
Ok, no spoilers here, the plot will provide enough for you.
I can't really think of anything good to say about this and unfortunately it's probably worse than the previous two which were far below the high benchmark set by the first.
This felt hollow from the plot to the script to the acting and even keeping Reaves and Moss couldn't save it. They looked like total strangers, no passion and no energy between them. Massive overuse of clips from the first film to patch things up but that just became annoying, it felt like a memorial to the original.
I watched this 2 days ago and can't really remember the plot and i'm half decent at remembering films but there was just so little to it, instantly forgettable. I didn't enjoy the need to push the CGI with the fluid character of Morpheus or the friendly flying cartoonlike creatures. It felt gimmicky and cheap.
The fight scenes were dull and overlong as well as the slow mo and the shooting scenes more ridiculous than ever with aim visibly off but still hitting every target. It was all just. A bit of a stretch and that's saying something for a matrix movie.
If you loved the original you have to watch the film but don't have high hopes. The ending was particular dull, cringy, anticlimactic and empty. :/ pretty disappointed to be honest.
Encounter (2021)
Worth a Watch
Having not heard anything about this and seeing a 5.8 rating i was a bit reluctant but watched as Riz Ahmed was in it.
I actually think it had a lot more potential to be padded out and made into something a little deeper. I saw the 'genre bending' reviews which was promising but pretty early on you know what the genre is and where things are going but that doesn't matter as the film does a decent job of keeping you on edge.
I never felt 100% convinced of what was going to happen which is a big plus and I thought the performances of the cast were all pretty good. The kids were fantastic.
Definitely more opportunity to delve into the aftermath of serving your country and what a lonely place it can be, some redemption there and not completely the typical ending for this type of film (i won't explain why)
it was just missing a few connecting pieces to make it noteworthy and something to really connect you to the main character, it felt a little short but i'm sure many say it was slow already.
Sunday afternoon material, but i've seen a lot worse.
Don't Look Up (2021)
Diverted off course.
Not sure where to start. My take on this is essentially that it's missing any heart and if you skipped 5-10 minutes at any point it wouldn't have really mattered, you'd have still known where you were and what was going to happen.
I thought the performances of DiCaprio, Lawrence, Streep and especially Rylance were fantastic but were carrying the rest of the film. I've seen reviews of 'flawless' and 'amazing direction' and i don't really get it. I've seen written 'the people who think this is poor are the people the film is aimed at' which is a bit ridiculous, i'd imagine a lot of those 'dumb' people watched and laughed along because that's what 'they' do.
First 20 mins i thought it was going to be great. And after that I realised i'd seen mars attacks and this was an updated version (i understand the differences...) but for me, that has a stronger identity than this post trump party.
I've seen satire and spoof done very similarly on TV and Ariana Grande's song reminded me of something you'd see on 'Children in Need', it was all just a bit cheap and obvious but maybe at 39 and from the UK i'm not where this is being pitched.
I think everyone should make their own minds up, see it for the really good performances but don't expect too much of the 'dark humour' i keep reading so much about or maybe i'm just desensitised. The two things i couldn't stand were Jonah hill and the ending.
That's about it. Meh.
Backcountry (2014)
better than average for its kind.
We started watching this as something to pass the time as we couldn't find anything good to watch if i'm honest but it was actually decent.
Wasn't sure about Balfours character and accent but it was a good plot diversion before things turn into a survival story and man vs bear.
For a good amount of the film it managed to stay tense which most of its kind fall flat. It's a simple plot , a simple film but one that isn't a waste of your time.
The Dark (2018)
more dull than dark
No spoilers here, i dont think there's a. Lot to spoil.
Definitely not a horror despite one of the 'undead' being in the film. I was confused about their undead state to be honest.
I love a slow burner but this was a little too slow with little going on as a sub plot. Nothing wrong with the acting really, there just wasn't much to this, didn't connect to any of the character and any horror/thriller element was over in the first 5/10 mins. Also reminded me of a couple of other friendship films between the non livers and a child.
I was just quite bored watching this.
The Neighbor (2017)
Just like marmite- Contentious!
After watching I'm not surprised it has split the viewers into love or hate it.
Not much really happens and I do think it's missing something, maybe a little pre amble and give us the chance to connect with the characters first BUT in a way, it's a bit brilliant.
Fichtner is actually fantastic because the entire film you are internally shouting at him and agonising over how slow, robotic and weak he is and angry at his simple and utterly sad situation, one he is creating himself.
It's frustrating, sad, slow, you don't care a bit about the neighbours or their situation and neither should he, he should be happy right? But after thinking and basically the film leaving me a bit depressed I have to say it's good because that's the point. A sad downward spiral of a pathetic middle aged man figure who's completely lost the way.
I can see why it has lots of bad reviews too. Well done to Fichtner though.
Tenet (2020)
Not Nolan's Best.
Reading a few of the reviews I'm glad to see I'm not alone. This is watchable but just barely and to some I can see it being just too much.
I won't contain spoilers but there seemed to be a few gaps or inconsistencies in the plot so I'm either not smart enough or Nolan made no efforts to explain anything deliberately because in actuality some of it just made no sense, I've enjoyed his previous complexity but this falls short.
Only really from a visual perspective does it have any impact but that wears off pretty quickly. And set are bland, featureless and boxy.
Characters are completely empty with little connection, the score is FAR too loud completely ruining scenes. I understand ramping it up to add to the chaos but it was too much and at points in no way matched the scene. Confusing the audience alone isn't justification of a good film, if I wanted viewing to not make sense, I'd watch count down.
Pattinson is good to be fair but that's about it. The whole thing in style was a bit to reminiscent of parts of inception and even Batman with the voice and big rigs but lacked and of the fun.
I've tried to not sound pretentious here which is something the film really struggles.
Redwood (2017)
Lost the will ......
Possibly the worst film I've seen and continued to watch.
If you are looking for that great horror to watch, this isn't it, if you are looking for mediocre, this isn't it. If you are looking for bad then this may just about work.
There are some nice trees in this film but that's about it. Script shocking, acting shocking, 'vampires' shocking, plot I'm not even really sure of. There was no flow, no tension, no atmosphere, no humour, no likeability for the characters of which there was no connection between.nothing seemed thought out or deliberate. For a film a a fair few tears they could have got actors who could actually cry, it was uncmfortable to watch.
Just everything was wrong even down to the final twist and the weird music to end the film. It's a b movie of school level production. Even Xander couldn't pull this one back from the dead. I'm sorry to be so negative but I've had better hour and a halves in A&E.
Man on Fire (2004)
All style no depth
Took a loooong time to get to watching this but with Denzel and walken I thought I'd give it a go.
Bit of a waste of time.
The plot is a fairly standard action revenge and the only thing that really keeps it going is Washington but even he struggles a bit to make you feel anything. Mostly I think due to the complete over editing, constant background sounds and music taking away from any emotion.
That 'gritty' over bleached shaky filter/edit makes half of the film look like that video piracy warning at the start of films and it runs the who way through the film. I'm pretty sure in this scenario too in sunny Mexico, Washington's character would literally have an army of the brotherhood/cartel to face from the get go but it's mostly all 1-1 action..
I guess it is what it is really, an action revenge flick and absolutely nothing more.
The Witches (2020)
More Stuart Little than the Witches. A no from me.
I'm writing this two thirds of the way through confident my mind won't be changed.
This film is the reason I generally don't watch modern remakes of good films but my girlfriend made me so.... There's just no need for it and no need to 'bring it up to date'.
There's none of the eeriness of the original, none of the like-ability in the lead characters. The two stars are for the lead child and stanly tucci.
No humour whatsoever so far but the easy 'fat kid' jibes to keep kids entertained.
Anne Hathaways lead witch visually just reminded me of Mars attacks and the accent was and is too much even though it's meant to be.
Just a lot of bland CGI none sense. Having said that I'm sure there are loads of 10 year olds that have enjoyed it.
If you enjoyed the original, give this one a miss to avoid disappointment.
Strange But True (2019)
Interesting but lacking in depth
No spoilers*
Interesting plot which did get my attention and wondered how this would play out over an hour and a half.
Probably around 40 minutes in I realised I hadn't really connected to any of the characters and we were some way into the plot already. No problem with the acting, I thought it was fine, I just think the dialogue/backstory was lacking a bit of emotional depth to really have you rooting at least one character in what should be an emotional backstory, it needs a little grit.
Nick Robinson and Amy Ryan were great but not enough of the other characters. Basically it could have been 30 minutes longer and invested a bit more in the them. The dark undertone was great and you'll be casting a suspicious eye over a few of the characters through the film.
I enjoyed the mixed ending but felt the last 5-10 minutes were all to quick.
Worth a watch but just don't expect too much from it, the 5.9 rating is about right.