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Reviews
The Muppet Christmas Carol (1992)
Magical!
I know that the purest out there who consider Alastair Sims' version of a Christmas Carol to be the only good interpretation of the classic, but in my opinion, the Muppet Christmas Carol wins out. The only thing keeping me from giving it 10 stars instead of nine is the dreadful, now removed from most copies, scene of a young Scrooge being serenaded to by his failed girlfriend Belle. But now that that awful scene has been removed I give it a theoretical 10.
Elf (2003)
My Favorite?
This movie is slowly becoming my favorite holiday film. I mean, there's a lot of competition for that title. Miracle on 34th Street, it's a Wonderful Life, The Man Who Came to Dinner, Alistair Sims' Christmas Carol, Muppet Christmas Carol, The Santa Clause (#1), White Christmas... the list goes one. Elf is so well-crafted and excellently helmed by Jon Favreau in his first spin as Director, that I consider it to be totally flawless. I might just be obsessed with it. Get your family together and enjoy this one. Over and over and over and over.
The Santa Clause (1994)
Wonderful!
An excellent, well thought out film that is the perfect way to kick off the holiday season. Get the family together, make some hot cocoa, and gather around the TV, and enjoy the wonder. Oh, one more thing, avoid the sequels, number two and number three are abominations!
The Santa Clause 2 (2002)
The Horror!
Imagine your Michael Lembeck, and you wanna direct a sequel to the original film, only you want to make the sequel the worst sequel in the history of mankind. The Santa Clause 2 makes Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom look like the Citizen Kane of sequels. This film is so bad, I'd rather watch Santa Claus Conquers the Martians. Avoid this film at all costs. Burn and destroy any copies of this that you might have laying around. Let's all get together and strike it from the history of all cinema.
Stage Door (1937)
The Words Keep Flying
The women do a fine job of reciting their lines, in this heavily scripted barrage of quips, sarcasms, insults and one-liners. One can only imagine how difficult it was to watch this movie in a crowded theater, due to the way the comedic script is delivered like machine gun fire, with scripted adlibs piled up in swaying towers, on top of one another.
How to Be Very, Very Popular (1955)
Truly Awful
What a complete and utter waste of time! Thank god Marilyn Monroe passed on this worthless drivel. From concept to script, to pacing, direction and acting, the entire film is phoned in. And why is nearly every woman clothed in draped curtains (except for the sporadic over the top dance flurries? There is really no reason to watch this, unless you've got time to waste, and you're all alone, and every other channel is on the fritz, and it's pouring rain,hail and snow, and your refrigerator is empty, and you've disposed of all reading matter, and your car is in the shop, and your house needs no sprucing up, well maybe...
That's What I Am (2011)
Looks wrong
Having been around in 1965, the year in which That's What I Am takes place, I just had to put in my 2 cents, regarding the look. First off, in 1965 the Beatles had been known in the U.S. for less than 1 year, and though as I recall, growing up in North Jersey, by '65 there were maybe a handful of kids attempting to embrace the hairstyle, this movie is littered with mop tops. 1965 was still a pretty conservative time and in general, if a kid got their parents to agree to letting their bangs being even 1" longer, it was a miracle. But long and over the ears? Never. It's the Chachi factor -- Happy Days inaccuracies continue. Second item: The Cars. Though true there were still fifties cars around in 1965, this movie looks like a classic car show. When I discovered this film recently, until I saw the main character's quaf, I thought it was going to be another greaser movie. 3: The Clothes. I swear I saw the mother wearing a psychedelic blouse. Whatever. 4th, the angry parents coming out against the gay Mr. Simon... In 1965 authority ruled. The school was always right and the parents agreed. If kids spread a rumor, parents went with the school. I can't count how many times I saw teachers man handle bad kids and get away with it, and I went to a public school. For all the money they spend to make these movies, you would think the fact checkers would peer a little closer into the facts.
Lady in the Lake (1946)
Stiff
Besides the fact that the seriously non-tough guy, Montgomery, is entirely wrong as Marlowe, the major issue with this noble attempt at first person filming, is that it comes off as incredibly stiff and stagnant. Nearly every shot of Marlowe's point of view is a perfectly frozen stare at whatever action is occurring. Who in the world ever maintains an eye-lock on anything for longer than a few seconds? Yet Marlowe never shifts his frozen stare away from the perfectly posed and lit talking heads, not even while walking across the street! I guess technology, being what it was at the time, just wouldn't allow for the ideal hand-held camera, which most likely didn't exist. Nice try, but a total failure.