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Reviews
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem (2023)
Oh gosh, it's just awful...
To be honest, I was bored within the first five minutes, and never recovered. Would have walked out if I didn't take the kids.
The film is crippled by a slow moving plot that takes ages to develop. There is wayyy too much dialogue. "Action" scenes are rather flat, and of course tamed for the PG-rating demographic. The whole film is dark and dimly lit - there is almost no variation in lighting for the whole movie.
The heroes manage to instantly convince the baddies to change sides with a moral-of-the-story "killing things is bad" pep talk. Really? (massive facepalm)
Unfortunately they've set the post-ending narrative open for an obvious sequel.
The only saving grace for this film is the animation, but even that was tired and done-before (similar animation style to the recent Superman film, which is much more enjoyable). Young fans of TMNT may enjoy this, but nostalgia he animation alone isn't enough to carry this film.
Jurassic Shark (2012)
A perfect accidental parody of the megashark genre 🦈
If you don't watch this as an unintentional parody, you're watching it wrong. This film is so terrible, it's fantastic.
An evil corporation, illegal research, an "I-told-you-so" do-gooder scientist, several bikini-clad bimbos, an abandoned island, and "that thing" in the water... What's not to love?
With dramatic irony notes as thick as a plank, cut-scene transitions straight outta iMovie, clipart-style fonts in the titling, visual fx obviously created in MS Paint, and side-splitting horror, this is the low-budget high school handicam project that accidentally made the big time.
Who will survive? Who will suffer the most dramatic fate at the hands of the thing?
Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse (2023)
Amazing Animation
Amazing animation - the blend of artwork styles across the film is very unique and visually pleasing. There is a high level of attention to detail in the artwork.
The storyline can be a little hard to follow because there's so much happening visually, but the plot is far from boring and is engaging throughout the film.
There is a good use of humour and references to pop memes.
Some dark and scary themes and intense scenes make this maybe not a film for younger children - even if they are Spiderman fans - but the content fits solidly within the PG rating bracket. High levels of animated action.
Search Party (2016)
Probably should've quit at the end of Season 3
The first three seasons are fantastically addictive. The plot twists are engaging and impossible to predict; the satirical humour is on-point; and the characters are overt caricatures - but somehow loveable, relatable and endearing.
Season 4 starts to teeter as the plot begins to strain and stretch to stay relevant to the previous three, and the trademark humour of the previous seasons wanes.
Season 5 - wtf? It's as though the writers completely threw out the previous four seasons and wrote something entirely different from scratch. The characters seem to undergo a complete reset and the storyline has virtually nothing in common with the past seasons.
To be frank, the last season is a real let-down that ruins the fantastic build-up of Seasons 1-3. The series should probably have ended at Season 4, or maybe even Season 3.
Puss in Boots: The Last Wish (2022)
A bit too dark and scary for a "kids" movie
I'm glad I *didn't* take my younger kids to see this. I would not recommend this film for young children.
The big bad wolf appearing throughout the film is quite a dark/scary character, combined with the overall themes around death.
The other 'bad guy' characters (Jack Horner, Goldilocks and The Three Bears) are quite sinister in parts.
There are several jump-scare moments, suspenseful scenes and fight scenes with dramatic SFX.
There is some humour to offset the darkness, but this is definitely not the bright and happy comedy movie you'd expect from the Dreamworks / fairytale / Shrek spin-off franchise.
Space Jam: A New Legacy (2021)
Underwhelmed - The 1996 Original was Much Better.
Nike wins an Oscar for gratuitous logo placement in almost every scene.
The plot is boring and drags along. Doesn't really go anywhere or get to the main event until the last half hour of the film. At least it gets remotely interesting from that point. (About halfway through, my 4yo restlessly piped up "Why is it taking so long?")
Too many side thoughts become distracting from the main thread as Warner Bros tries desperately to cram in a reference / cameo to every franchise in its massive arsenal.
Almost nothing is funny or humorous - which is disappointing for a movie based around looney tunes characters.
The "acting" is cardboard and feels scripted. (I suppose that's what you get when there's nothing left in the talent budget after paying for the main elite athlete star.)
If you are a Le Bron fan, this might just be passable.
The War with Grandpa (2020)
"Oops. That happened."
If you're looking for a quality comedy - this isn't it. This movie doesn't live up to the hype or action promised.
Overall the storyline is passable, and there's a good message to it, but some of the acting feels more like script reading.
The side gags are repetitive and don't really add to the plot. Some of the minor characters feel unnecessary and an unjustified add-on to fill out the plot.
Cats & Dogs 3: Paws Unite (2020)
"Boring is Good" pretty much sums it up.
Flat, cardboard cut-out voice acting. Way too much dialogue for a kids movie. A plot that takes three quarters of the film to get to the point. Obvious puppet paws. What's not to love? :'(
SamSam (2019)
Positive Movie with Cuteness
Great for younger kids in the 3-10yo age bracket. Nothing scary and full of cute, likeable characters and there's plenty of good humour. Art direction is great with some really good visuals.
Bolshoe puteshestvie (2019)
Terrible
The plot turns a new corner every 5 minutes with the introduction of a new character. The acting is flat and the dialogue is stilted and emotionless; it seems more like they're reading the script from a page.
Would've walked out if I hadn't brought the kids.