fordprefect42-0 Reviews

Twisted Desire (1996 TV Movie)

Thriller-by-numbers

[20 January 2003]

First of all it was fun seeing the star of angsty-but-nice teen programmes "Clarissa" and "Sabrina the Teenage Witch" playing a MURDEROUS PSYCHOPATH!!!! I'm not awfully sure if she was completely suited to this role, but maybe I was just biased after being used to the full extent of Melissa-Joan Hart's evil being a proclamation of "Ferguson you dork!" followed by an imaginary dream sequence in which she's the President and he's not. Or something.

Back to the movie itself, apart from the fact that the plot twists tended to stand on the not-to-distant horizon wearing flashing signs that read "I AM A PLOT TWIST", the course of events at least made sense and actually turned out to be rather credible. To his credit, the bloke playing her father almost made me want to murder him myself, especially when he showed up to the party and dragged her off before she could make it with that guy. He was annoying, over-bearing and probably the father from hell (for an American teenage girl).

I won't give away any more of the plot in case Melissa-Joan's many adoring fans want to watch this film without knowing what's going to happen; though I challenge anyone not to work the whole thing out by about 15 minutes into the movie!

Overall, I saw the beginning, kept watching and didn't switch it off. That's the main reason why I'm recommending it. My attention span is short, but for some reason it stayed with this film. I can't quite explain why (maybe Sabrina put a spell on me), but if you ever see it on TV and there's nothing else to do, you might as well give it a go.

Disappearance (2002 TV Movie)

Pretty good fun

[5 June 2002]

This film tries to be several things, including Blair Witch and Texas Chainsaw (which is actually referred to by one of the characters!). It doesn't do too badly, but none of the separate threads of the story really seem to go anywhere before it's finished - so many of the creepy events and features are forgotten as the film heads towards its climax. This is a shame, as the ideas were actually really good! Basically, don't expect more than a simple, dumb suspense movie!

Enemy at the Gates (2001)

Forget the story, check out the sniping!

[12 April 2001]

Well ok, the plot's not too bad - it is after all based on a true story (with an added love interest to keep the punters happy). But this is not what set it apart from any other war/romance films for me - what did that was those sniping scenes! The tension is unbelievable - I honestly felt like I was there, right in the thick of the action! After I left the cinema I caught a shape skulking in the shadows under a road bridge, and honestly thought twice (before discovering it was a discarded bin bag!). This film should also be praised for its dramatic imagery in general - the ruins of Stalingrad, littered with broken statues, miles of rubble and corpses, made a powerful image, not soon to be forgotten. A wonderful film in most respects. Recommended!

The Pandora Directive (1996 Video Game)

best of the series!

[11 April 2001]

I have to rate this one as the best of the three rather unconvincingly monikered "interactive movies" for the PC. "Under a Killing Moon" looked terribly cheap, and "Overseer" was just plain dull. "Pandora Directive" just about gets it right for me - fun (if hackneyed) plot, interesting characters (though sadly no Inspector Burns this time) and by the looks of it a pretty high budget all go toward making this pretty good fun, but still really nowhere near a true movie in any way, interactive or otherwise! Also bear in mind I played this game about 4 years ago, so by now the graphics etc. are probably absolutely laughable by today's standards!

The All New Adventures of Laurel & Hardy in 'for Love or Mummy' (1999)

Agreed, a great tribute indeed!

[11 April 2001]

However, perhaps I'm nitpicking, but in my opinion the "modern day" setting doesn't really seem to work in some respects. For a start, Stan and Ollie still wear their 30s/40s style attire - how many people do you catch wearing bowler hats in this day and age? At times, they seemed almost to be living in a bizarre time warp, which didn't really make sense.

Overall though, this is good, old-fashioned slapstick comedy, well in the spirit of the real Stan and Ollie. It's nice to see such innocent laughs for a change, with the kinds of films we're seeing most of the time today, this is a rare treat for the family!