handmethatspanner Reviews

65 (2023)

Good enough for bigger little-kids

[4/10 · 18 May 2024]

Parts of the imagery were well captured and the live cinematography was up to standard.

The CGI was rather hit and miss -- I'm sure there were budgetary considerations that set limits on time, talent and processing.

Actually a really good cast -- but you really can't go wrong with kids, even bigger kids. And all they had to do is express anger, fear, and fright. The acting, in so far as there was a script, was all that anyone could expect and no doubt they brought more to the screen than was on the page.

As for the pages . . .

A concept right out of the late 1950s. Rather good production design and values for a budget film.

Not nearly enough background research done -- this was written in a long afternoon by mildly intoxicated adults looking over the railing of the patio -- who clearly forgot that the internet is available to random folks who could become audience members and have more curiosity than these two writers do.

The temporally mis-located plants are forgivable -- I don't think many will recognize the west coast is a cheap substitute -- should have been filmed in a dense and lush tropical location dripping with humidity -- akin to other famous dinosaur movies that you can name.

Really a deplorable action script with gross unexplained blocking and movement -- not that it was bad but the audience will know that movement is wrong in that place and no explanation is given for why our hero makes that mistake -- quite reasonably, since he is not an explorer.

Complete with one predictable, convenient plot development after another -- worst of all failing to take the opportunities presented by the scenario for Adam's character's greater development.

If you were going to do an old school - 'I rescue you then you rescue me' -- Robinson Crusoe on Mars-1964 would have been a better starting point.

One must hope that Adam Driver had a lot of fun or got big bucks up front.

A very 'pretty' piece of fluff with a climax that is suitable only for the students who never read about the Chicxulub impact. That bit of artwork was right out of When Worlds Collide-1951.

The cinematic visual presentation is evidently where these two excel

Don't let these two write anymore without some supervision . . . I am available.

The Artifice Girl (2022)

Not done watching &THIS is must see!

[9/10 · 23 April 2024]

Why don't we have more writing like this!?!?!?

This is some of THE tightest dialog delivery I can remember. It would be exhausting for the actors but this would be a TERRIFIC stage play.

Compelling, outraging, provocative and introspective.

This is what genuine science fiction can fulfill best; to induce questions in the mind of the reader . . . Or the viewer.

The casting is immersive due in part to most of us not being familiar with all but one face.

Once I read commentary suggesting that Sci-Fi is improvisational in the jazz sense -- where the 'player' begins with a theme and improvises freely around that.

I think Jazz is often playing any note that fits but is not readily expected.

I can't say that this surprised me but I have an enormous background in Sci-Fi.

This WILL be used in film classes.

The Beekeeper (2024)

Huge Stathan fan -- but...

[5/10 · 6 February 2024]

Not up to par for Mr. Stathams previous efforts. Stunts were lackluster and hugely aided by crafty camera work. Actually rather well cast considering that we have a WHOLE PILE of actors playing Americans with coached accents that ALMOST pass, salted with a couple of the genuine article or maybe they just had better coaching.

Verges on science fiction as the technincal implausibilities stack up one after another. Its a hero piece so verisimiliyude is not required, but... I said FIVE stars because I really like Jason Statham -- a guilty pleasure.

But this one was plagued by thin writing. Almost saved by the production values.

Except where does anyone find an old stone mansion, common to England, and supposed to be built in America. Expedient, at best.

Illustrates why good writing prevails and lame writing -- is limp.

The Breakfast Club (1985)

I spiked the 9 to pull for a higher than 8...

[9/10 · 5 January 2024]

By happenstance I am fan of film since I was small so finding myself working in a video store { that could be hard to explain to much younger people } in 1986 after seeing this film in old-school, 1000-seat auditoriums -- and then recommending it to customers was an easy win for me.

At the time I told folks all of us need to see this every ten years or so just to be reminded of the feeling.

Nearly forty years later I am thinking that this will be, for its time, analogous to The Importance of Being Earnest in an entirely differently glib way.

Hughes, for pop cinema shows much of the same insightful attributes as the Victorian interpretations of their own time of Wilde, et.al, in theater.

This extends into wider themes high-pointed by the ruminations starting in the time of Mary Wollenstone Shelley and our many interpretations of THAT work since the original.

The Breakfast Club will be in the same sense timeless while of a different time -- still discussing how we feel *today* -- and yet each time feels that same way for those who lived it.

Wednesday: Friend or Woe (2022) Season 1, Episode 3

I liked it but...

[7/10 · 25 December 2023]

This is so politically motivated that the 'slumber-free' cheer and the rest wonder at the vilification.

Even so, this is remarkable well done. I am confident that the cast was really well led by the writers and direction. There is enough 'on the page' that the editing can step along briskly. Even the doofus boys are well written. The first episode drags a bit but this features the set-up. Ep.2 shows us Wednesdays character. Ep.3, this one, goes overboard on the two-dimentional mean kids but no hero fares well unless the villains are serious.

I liked best the dialog 'asides' which are numerous and quick enough to keep the viewer interested and chuckling.

Extraction (II) (2015)

A Bruce fan but - DNF - good for a film class

[4/10 · 22 November 2023]

I get that this is part of BW's swansong. This was as good a techno-spy-babble script as any of them are if predictable. I like that some once significant faces get to work with hopefuls yet to rise.

The real flaw was in the hands of the producers. They forgot that movies are a visual medium and went quick-dirty-low budget with the cinematography. Though this could have been (generously) an artistic choice that just did not pan out.

I came to this title through the so-called sequel which seems unrelated apart from the naming convention and which I liked well enough to seek this one out.

The writers had it all there -- it was the implementation from page to screen where the tapestry got thin.

Now almost no one gets it right the first time they make scratch waffles.

I will be looking for the - whatever they call it - part three.

Wild Mountain Thyme (2020)

Maybe it's because I'm a redhead -- or was

[9/10 · 15 November 2023]

Really, I am astonished at so many of the other reviews.

Ok -- the accents are commercial Irish accents -- but most of you lot would not be able to wade through the real thing for 5 minutes.

This is about compromising with the minds of others and the futility of resisting.

This is a weird happily ever after story that illuminates the rough road so many travel in the quest for love.

The best part about this is the casting. Not that these are all Irish faces but that these actors have dug deep to show us some Irish characters -- with thin dialects.

You might not know but The Irish have iron constitutions (not uniquely). The characters written are such as these -- which makes them irascible, stubborn, willful, and driven . . . Not always to long life and happiness.

This is also about the attachment to that land which some of you will recognize as 'old country', and there are MANY old countries.

If you get to traval far from your home you may meet folk that are sprung from old roots set into old soil, found in old countries.

I must say I am sad for those who did not feel the charm in this story. Have so many of you lost the mystical in your souls?

Maybe this has something to do with me being a redhead (or I was before it turned white), and my mom and her sister, who are of serious Irish extraction. You do not want to try to keep up with us drinking unless you are sprung from certain other northern european strains (never, ever, had a hangover, and not for lack of trying) and all my ancestors are.

Firefly (2002–2003)

2023 is years enough gone that this's so fun!

[10/10 · 22 October 2023]

Disclaimer: I am a huge fan. I own about 2000 sci-fi novels. I own the series and the movies. The writing is inspired. The 'first' episode shown features intricate and terse dialog that speaks volumes in each syllable.

Not having seen it yet you will still recognize this cast as marvels in each their own rights.

And here the ensemble meshes oh so well. Even the set design is inspired. The world-building takes a few poetic-licenses as one expects with Sci-Fi and is more evocative of the world we lived in when this was new. Much is criticized regarding the stylings of the weaponry and western flair that glosses over the whole production: let me explain this to those with a novice view of sci-fi. Regardless of where built and how distant 'colony' worlds are separated from where ever home might be, horses and donkeys are the first choice for the early generations due to the fact that horses plus grass make more horses, etc. And a kinetic weapon is far more reliable and constructible than any electronic beam or force projector type you can imagine. Besides, flying-hammers are not easily defeated nor blocked and dissipate far less than, as one example, a plasma beam in atmosphere. Tech aside, the characterizations light up the screen and the supporting actors ( thank good writing and direction ) hit all of their marks and make us love/hate them explicitly. You will probably need to own this since you will be watching it more than once. Surprisingly, even the score is great.

The single good thing about the show having been cut short is that the creative inspiration easily outlasted the number of episodes such that none of them are perfunctory.

Were it so that I could watch this as a new infatuation rather than an old lover.

Almost Famous (2000)

Well, you had to be there!

[9/10 · 30 September 2023]

Apart from a terrific cast, many of whom are ancillary, that often give some of what *I* think are their best portrayals -- and snippets of some terrific rock tunes, The costumes are right, most of the cars are right -- this is a really good look at what life actually looked like.

It's an endearing story, much as we wish it had been . . . If only we had all been so deep.

BACKGROUND: "...it only takes eighteen minutes a page." Great line!

Man. We were so young in '73 ( the year I graduated ).

Our optimism would take a hard one to the ball-sack in '74. The Gas-Crunch was the beginning of a slide we could not stop.

It could have been that Carter would pull us out of the dive but he was the kind of man you wanted as a next-door neighbor. . . ( He TRIED to get the US to establish a real energy policy ) . . . Then there was the fall of the Shah ( a putz ).

It became apparent that a great neighbor was not who was needed as President. Too nice a guy. We were not worthy of him.

This is after Nixon ( & Ford ), for you kids, the guy who sold us on China ( which looked like a really great idea at the time ) and saved us from being ravaged by foreign gold traders by de-linking the Dollar from gold. This was also the hamstringing of our Space Program.

Then we got Reagan which frightened everyone. But it also poleaxed the Russians, which was ALL to the good. No one else could have bamboozed them like he did.

Then The Wall falls, the USSR falls . . . And it has been like nine-pins -- with everyone falling.

NOT that this was the only path forward to the 21st Century ( thank you Walter Chronkite ). But no one could agree on a vision that included everyone. We have been in a stall ever since.

Goof-ball that he is, Musk is the brightest, if variable, star we have. And he shoots off weird coronal mass ejections in odd directions.

*The next ten years ( '23 to '33 ) will be up to a generation that represents my grandkids -- Your future growth and glory is NOT on one planet -- nor in little screens, with toy blocks on them, that run on batteries that can't last for five years.

You will need to reinvent yourselves into MY grandparents generation. Those were the kids born in 1900. They went, actually, from Horse & Buggy to the Space Shuttle -- in one lifetime.

You CAN do this.

No one can do it for you.

When we are gone we will still be pulling for you.

*** A message I want all of you born after 1974 to take to heart.

The Flash (I) (2023)

9 Because no film is perfect

[9/10 · 27 August 2023]

DC makes a comeback -- and they might make it stick!

Maybe Zack Snyder's Justice League Directors Edition -- is not a fluke (if a shaky one).

Now then I must tell you that in the comics from the fifties and sixties, if you were a fan, you had to read all of them.

DC was IT -- for a time -- and Marvel was just fun and a bit different, quirky and had imaginative art that appealed to intoxicated college students -- the newcomer from after the days when The Batman was new and your heroes were on the radio (which is my parents era).

Having read all of the old Flash comics and remembering most/some of them, I recall the fundamental issue raised in *this script* re: the consequences of time travel.

I watched George Reeves on TV in B&W on a tiny screen . . . Well not so tiny as an iPad . . .

I watched Batman (the parody?) in the 60s.

I read of Earth 2 and 'alternate' incarnations of the Flash in 15 cent comics from a rack in the local drug store.

I saw Superman in the 70s and we were all IMPRESSED. DC was a THING -- again!

Then they lost it 'cuz the studios went nuts over cheap sequels -- which spread to all the studios and we got . . . To where we are today. Which is really sad for those of us who remember -- before.

{ a note to the younger viewers -- the first time we see ANY character interpose themselves through solid matter was in a George Reeves -- Superman episode when he 'interpenetrates' an impervious vault with a criminal inside who is trying to out-wait the statute of limitations . . . This would be about 1958 or '59 } {also; although we read of The Flash moving faster than time several times as well as translocating into alternate universes; Earth II -- we "see" Superman "travel" faster than time to rescue Lois Lane in the '77 sequel -- which was a pretty good one}

And it's sad, but less so, for the young ones who don't remember movie houses with more than 1000 seats in one auditorium or rising as a single mass to give standing ovations to Star Wars A new Hope that first day.

Then Marvel reinvents itself with Spiderman-Tobey Maguire and we get the Marvel Universe . . . Which might have imploded recently during the time of which I was NOT happy with the DC universe and a lackluster track record with too many guys cast as The Batman which sometimes showed inspiration but -- really -- how many reboots can the audience take?

Here we see real inspiration in bringing all the schizophrenic DC gyrations into a cohesive singularity WHILE tying in some of the better thinking of the original comics.

WELL DONE!

Yes -- I could have voted for ten stars but no film is perfect.

I will probably have to buy a copy of this one.

You all have so much to dig into -- if you have the interest in where DC has traveled on its journey to THIS effort.

Three Thousand Years of Longing (2022)

Watched twice over a couple of years

[8/10 · 7 August 2023]

It gets better with time. NOT what you would call a kids story it IS for the child in us.

It is about self examination and the life well considered. It is a cautionary tale of sorts. It is a story about love, affections, lusts, passions, & respect.

This one is seriously underrated. Besides a great cast it is lovingly captured.

There are things you see over more than one viewing. One favorite bit is the motes of 'stuff', how they were lit, how they move with hallway scene blocking.

This is one that will be a cult classic for quite a while.

This could easily be mounted on stage for live theater -- if you could cast it... It helps that I have a theater background and one, I am whimsical and two, I am a fan of movies and three, I am a hopeless romantic.

This will serve best those who are like me.

Asteroid City (2023)

..."Sorry -- am I not in this part" ... ( I snicker )

[8/10 · 6 August 2023]

Now, I remember this era.

I remember the TV shows and what are now considered icons and memes of that time, since I am of that time.

While nostalgia has probably morbidly overtaken people not native to THAT time -- I am astonished at how well it is portrayed, all-be-it hyperbolically, by more recent humans.

Wes Anderson's work may not appeal to everyone but I like his peri-animation take on cinema. I will skip detailing the artwork.

As in W. A.'s other works it is great fun tweezing out all the faces sprinkled in you might know from their other efforts. In this case it is fun as an old fart to recall just whom these new faces are likely intended to reflect as individuals or stereotypes.

I will probably need to buy a copy of this.

The Thomas Crown Affair (1968)

Superior craft --Suffers from old technology

[9/10 · 12 July 2023]

There is nothing I can say about Faye Dunaway & Steve McQueen . . . Just all Aces. The co-stars and supporting cast are appallingly realistic -- clad in what seem to be corny costumes but are just what was worn then. I note here particularly Yaphet Koto who I think first appears in film here -- later of Alien fame.

The story is contrived but not as much as the '99 re-make, and is the weakest part of the production -- if necessary.

One of the best composed soundtracks, apart from the title song which is a pop-hack, yet it is poorly recorded by today's standards.

The work, taken as a single piece with many movements is wonderfully composed -- and out of print or just really hard to find as an aftermarket studio re-recording by Michel Lagrand.

The soundtrack is presented only monophonically in the film with poor rendering. This is 1967 -- the boom in Jazz popularity for Boomers in 1980 is informed by this sound track and, surprisingly by the Schultz-Peanuts jazz riffs that a certain generation was raised on.

Jewison none-the-less manages to paint images of that time and for that time that despite relatively low technology is evocative, delicate, industrious, and engrossing.

This is worth owning a copy -- and I do.

Red Dragon (2002)

Brilliant cinema regardless of genre

[9/10 · 20 May 2023]

I like caper movies. I like detective movies. I am not a fan of horror nor grimnoir -- but this is just terrific movie making.

Dynamite or crackerjack, even inspired casting, while accurate, fails to take note of the supporting ensemble actors.

Emily Watson is nothing short of brilliant in her own short scenes -- also worthy of note is the few bits we see from un-named police officers & FBI supporting characters.

Some of this is to be credited to Brett Ratner of whose work *some* I like but this is nothing short of masterful direction.

This production is favored by good soil to cultivate wonderful plants into but the editing, the direction and the cinematography must be credited to the producers. The Dino De Laurentiis studio regularly disappoints me -- this is the exception.

The Matrix Resurrections (I) (2021)

A *7* for politics

[7/10 · 30 March 2023]

First viewing is just fun, games, and nostalgia with pretty pictures.

Second viewing is for all the quick-cuts and micro-images the production designers, editors and director spun into the visual narrative -- and the appreciation of a long movie that does not seen overly long.

Third viewing is for the several bits of dialog culminating in the last scene where we are warned about 'the easy path', delegating responsibility -and- philosophically accepting -- yielding to -- the notion that all life is suffering whereas the point is that there *is no easy path* and things like eternal vigilance and a constant struggle for forward progress against the current are our lot in life AND the source of satisfaction in the journey rather than the destination.

Nobody (I) (2021)

A bit too short!

[8/10 · 22 March 2023]

Leaves us wanting more. Clearly the door is left open for a sequel.

I hope they intended that this be funny! I was snickering much of the time. This was just plain fun -- of the guilty pleasure variety.

The gotta keep Michael Ironside involved!

Recent 'losses' to the action movie community may have had a thinning influence on the lead characters we have become accustomed to seeing for . . . Several decades in some cases.

Gratefully we still have these stalwart's efforts preserved -- you DO own copies on disk -- don't you?

We see here a worthy set of hands behind the camera and faces in front with sufficient capabilities to fill the void.

We must hope that the writers and other creatives can continue to stretch for the next rung.

All they need is an implausibly goofy premise to be treated most seriously and then continue to let the humor peek out in the editing.

I would have said this was an *8* if it had been a bit longer!

A Foreign Affair (1948)

In 2023 -- you need to see this

[9/10 · 24 February 2023]

1948 A different time that THIS time, 2023, is reminiscent of.

Cycles.

I was born 7 years later in the hot part of the Cold War. The Red Scare was THE THING. McCarthyism and sharp polarization. A well documented period of what we know as cancel culture. Not a new thing then or now. If we can avoid bloody sacrifices ( Rome ) and immolation ( The Dark Ages ) we will be lucky.

From one point of view the Reds were a balancing influence rather like the Moon and tides effects the real motion of the Earth. Note that we are, oddly, less stable since that fall of the Soviet Union.

As a species it seems we will sacrifice anything, at that moment, to increase stability over perceived unpredictability.

A Foreign Affair (1948), what we call a Rom-Com today, is an insightful look at what was happening THEN without in-your-face hyperbole -- while still illuminating so many social issues that we feel are so au-courant today, yet are oh so not new at all.

And it is done quite charmingly if, from the perspective of a new century, a bit stilted and contrived.

It feels a bit like a theatrical melodrama with substantial comic-relief.

This is a piece that could be and should be done on High-School stages -- if there are any Theater programs still offered in US High Schools anymore.

There is a great deal of really well composed dialog and lyrics (?) delivered with substantial second and third order significance.

Maybe they could watch this in English Lit. Classes.

This should be watched and not forgotten.

Moonfall (2022)

The stuffed shirts missed all the FUN!

[7/10 · 14 February 2023]

Moonfall 2022

OH! Come ON, you nay-sayers! This was made for popcorn and sodas.

Fun. Prettymuch completely ignores Newton, Einstein, Maxwell and still it is fun. So 2001 A-S-O it ain't.

By my count there are five acts with several left-turns.

Shines on family values and vaguely (slightly) sneers at political correct K453n ladies and inflexible Old Guys.

Traditional goodguys vs badguys bits pop up here and there.

As expected, sparkling digital effects with better than average production design is on display ( Ooooh -Shiney! ). The basic storyline is conventional schmaltz with substantial off-hand humor that is indifferently cast about.

Highlights the importance of those who do not fit in and outliers in general. Surprising that this film did as well as it did in China where (as the poet said) 'Conform or be cast out' is the standard.

An oh-so-convenient escape into a possible sequel . . . Of course. Not exactly a guilty pleasure but clearly no-nutritional-value entertainment.

With a big nod to David Weber - if you have read him thoroughly you will know why.

Gone Girl (2014)

Superb Cast -- dumb story

[5/10 · 13 February 2023]

It's like the writer phoned it in. Soooo conventional plot complications. It's like a comedy of errors but it isn't funny. Excellent production values and it seems a zillion folks really like this. These are the same folks that watch re-runs of football games.

My guess is that the telegraphing of events is from the writer as opposed to the director. It almost cookie-cutter with better actors. And these are a few of my favorite actors -- who CAN do suspense brilliantly. But not here.

Slow... Predictable... ...maybe if I had the world's best popcorn and a hot date to watch this with.

I don't know how many times I have seen these plot elements before...

This might work well as a cautionary tale for the congenitally naive done by terrific producer, cast and crew.

Clearly a book (unread by me) that I will work to avoid.

Fahrenheit 451 (2018)

The contemporary idiom has changed

[8/10 · 9 February 2023]

I read the book, so long ago. I saw the film as an adolescent -- and several times after that.

Naturally the book is literary. Bradbury was poetic and prosaic and also a visionary.

An argument could be made that Truffaut was nearly a seminal artist in film.

This is a telling for this century. A message piece, it is no less a cautionary tale than the first two iterations -- but it is tuned to minds from THIS century.

As if the originators of the storyline -- knew -- something could happen.

I say it it an 8 because it needed to be said once more. Not because it is 'high art' or features great insight. It is an 8 because it will be watched, understood, and appreciated by minds born after 1999.

The last time I saw the 1966 movie was in an English class in high school -- by which time it was old news to me.

How many people do you know under 35 who read no books?

That is why this is an 8.

Titane (2021)

8 -- for thought provocation

[8/10 · 9 February 2023]

Titane

Minutes ago I watched Titane. Then I scanned several dozen reviews from amateur & professional critics.

I watch and read A LOT of Science Fiction / Speculative Fiction. I've been paying attention since 1959 to this ( genre is too limiting ) *bandwidth?* and exploring as many works from as many auteurs as I can, dating back to the late 19th Century. From this we can see that I am old.

The range of possible & applicable words choices to write next are blinding.

This film is realized from a single mind that, my guess, could not have expressed it so well if limited to words.

The film does not so much make statements - that would be much easier for audiences and reviewers to get a grip on - as much as it opens more widely many vectors of inquiry we might have already extended our gaze towards.

In no particular order, ideas explored are: -who or what do I get a thrill from/with?

-how shall I contend with any other present when it is evident that the attendant agendas are not congruent?

-if one is be a mother how might one consider that something is growing inside of me . . . And though I will do this alone, will I have assistance?

-social animals as we are, to what degree is sustentation ( I had to dig for that one ) obliged to us and/or required for actualizing our personal agenda?

-regardless of roll or part, don't we all need to be sustained?

-to what degree, if any, is unique outlier attributes a justification for severely diminishing or eliminating those who are conventional?

-what do parous females contribute to soon to be parous females?

-sexual drive aside, where do we find the values in parous males?

-just where does each of us fit into a world where meta-para-trans-cyber-humanism rises to ascendancy?

Driven by - free-association - a short list, in no particular order, of movies that come to mind; Metropolis (1927) Saturn 3 (1980) Demon Seed (1977) Fahrenheit 451 (1966) Ex Machina (2014) Liquid Sky (1982) Quest For Fire (1981) The Fly (1986) ...

True Grit (2010)

Really an 8.5 ( a 10 w/ demerits )

[8/10 · 8 February 2023]

Raised on westerns I love the John Wayne original. Kim Darby was under-appreciated and excelled in her part. The Original -- is a Western / Horse-Opera of singular significance.

This 2010 edition is a Historical Costume Drama with slightly hyperbolic & overwrought dialog that, non-the-less, better characterizes the style of speech of the time -- IF you were to see a live performance on the stage of a playhouse -- instead of on the streets of a 's~~t-kicker'.

No fault of the cast, here. Their diction, stilted, of the highly filigreed dialogue is fully of the time.

Most viewers will scarcely recall the actors in their characters.

Arguably John Wayne is too recognizable whereas Jeff Bridges looses himself in Rooster Cogburn. Maddy must be the character who sticks out like a sore thumb because that is the whole point.

The lasting impression of the first version upon several viewings is that it is Kim Darby's Maddy who has 'true grit'.

The lasting impression of the second edition is that many characters display 'true grit' -- it was, after all, a gritty time. This edition also features great incidental characters.

The faithful details and production values of the costuming & set dressing are too well captured by the better technology and are, if anything, too bright & clear -- loosing some of the hard-fought-for realism.

This would have been a ten in my estimation if the sound-scape had more ambient character in settings of exterior scenes and the too well lighted interiors of some scenes had revealed more dust motes and a more crepescular office interior in the stables scene.

My guess is that the studio pressed for a shorter running time in the final edit which rushes the Last Act.

This is one worth owning. As is the first one.

Black Adam (2022)

Fun . . . enough? Well, 5.5 stars anyway

[5/10 · 22 January 2023]

Here is a case to the contrary -- this time the Writers had it! The production values, digital, were there.

So not the best story I ever ran across but, a good one.

It should have been funnier. The humor was in the script and the lines were delivered -- but... A fortune -- pissed away!

They lost it in the Direction and the Editing.

Timing is everything -- not that I have it.

All those funny bits -- set up-- and then fumbled.

Generally I think this is part of a syndrome Hollywood has. Not specific to this movie -- a general malaise.

As invented in the dim dark unpleasantness of the early 20th Century, Movies were an inexpensive way for mass distraction from (OMG just list off the ugly that was back then) all the peril of life we have forgotten today.

It comes back in lesser editions -- COVID was nothing as a percentage compared to the so-called Spanish Flu. Polio & Smallpox are forgotten.

Also forgotten is that a movie cost Pennies or a Nickel.

By 1960, my first movie era, it cost a Quarter. A gallon of gas was about 21¢ then.

That's one theater admission per gallon. Something a kid can afford. So that would be about $4 each.

Making movies that dial in on twelve-year-olds that cost $15.00 or more means that all your customers have to be wage earners -- not kids.

Yet -- they are making movies that appeal to kids rather than adults.

It is not the subject matter -- it is The Treatment.

Canned spaghetti-ohs works for kids. Boxed Mac&cheese works for kids.

Adults expect a good Bolognese or at least a smooth Alfredo for adult prices.

Lone Wolf and Cub: Sword of Vengeance (1972)

Now, . . . a 10 is ridiculous, but . . .

[10/10 · 14 January 2023]

Why is this a ten?

Let me tell you MY story. I finished High School in Portland. In the 70s there were MANY Art-House cinemas as well as the Northwest Film Study Center., there.

Anyone with the interest had easy access to films from all over the world. At the time there were many multi-screen drive-in theaters. Three with four screens, 4 with two screens and maybe 6 more single screen drive-ins within a reasonable distance. Main stream movie houses were still huge seating 1000, commonly.

The pattern was, load up your movie chums, get them loaded, drive in. Load up with popcorn, etc. And stay up til 3 watching double features. Catch-22 was the first title I watched with a group. If no group was handy you went to one of the Art Houses like The Movie House or 5th Avenue Cinema and watched a mix of you really did not know what but these were curated by folks who did know.

Around 1978 we, for values of we, . . . Were at the 82nd Street Drive In and Shogun Assassin was featured second with something forgettable playing first. This was the edited down version dubbed for the US and taken from the Lone Wolf & Cub Series that I knew nothing about.

A marvel, in the truest sense because we knew nothing about *chanbara* -or- *chambara*.

Kung-Fu movies were all the rage and were silly unless they appealed to you. Art films they were not.

So Shogun Assassin was a revelation. Something like giving a pass to George Romero and all but the funniest zombie movies until World War Z.

Why Is this a Ten?

In 1981 I was living in Tokyo ( two syllables...To-Kyo ) and I am ostensibly learning Japanese and teaching English. Watching TV I got so I could make out weather reports and then . . . I discovered Mute Samurai -or- Silent Samurai -- staring Tomasaburo Wakayama -- who has no dialog. Perect for a *gaijin* struggling with *Nihongo*.

The star of Shogun Assassin / Lone Wolf & Cub is Tomasaburo Wakayama and essentially Produced by his brother Shintaro Katsu via Katsu Productions.

Also in re-runs in Tokyo was the Zatoichi series which would later bloom into the Zatoichi's... Series again by Katsu Productions lead by Shintaro Katsu as Zatoichi with Tom Wakayama taking side parts now and then.

Oddly enough Tokyo had a similar number of movie screens as Portland despite the huge difference in population -- though ALL theaters seated more than 1000. We saw Tron, The Road Warrior, Quest For Fire, and many others, notably Blade Runner -- which was freaky because exiting the movie theater after that show, in the rain, made my Japanese girlfriend and myself start at the similarity to many of the scenes in Blade Runner.

To the point -- If you take all three of these Katsu Productions works as a sort of mass exploration of the genre -- clustering them into a single grand opus -- you can see why I give this a ten!

If you like one -- you will like them all.

The Old Man (2022– )

An actual 9.5 -- nobody is perfect

[9/10 · 2 January 2023]

Makes me want to read the book. I saw only one (1!!!) continuity error. This is the stuff you go to the cinema to see -- but movies these days too often disappoint.

Thoughtful characters behaving intelligently. Great dialog that is generally terse and propels the story quickly. Each segment DOES NOT WASTE TIME!

Some of the best casting ever, vis-a-vis young/old characters.

Insightful characters apart from where plot convenience pulls dunce behavior out for a bit of dramatic timing.

It is a fantasy in that there are inescapable implausibilities sprinkled here and there but -- here is a viewer experience that does not insult the sharp viewer.

Could there be more of the like from the well of the original author? In a new story one could hope.

We must also hope that they don't milk this out into absurdity -- like a certain big eared studio does so often...