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The Lighthouse (2019)
Immoral Garbage
A lot of imagination and resources wasted on yet another spree of negativity and obscenity. As if real life weren't bad enough. Avoid. Do yourself a favour and find a more uplifting film instead. Don't support these kinds of excretions into your psyche.
Let Him Go (2020)
Completely bad
This is a depressing, nihilistic film that even lacks any artistic merit. No surprises either. None of the main characters is sympathetic, and they all act in irrational ways. But worst of all, it's one scene after another ranging from boredom to trauma. Who needs that? Film making has reached a new low.
Ghostbusters: Afterlife (2021)
Wasted opportunity
I loved the first two Ghostbusters and the cartoon. And as far as I've been concerned, there has been no further entry in the series until this one. But given the budget and resources - and thirty years' planning, it falls flat. It's shameful enough they waited so long that a main cast member died, but it's worse that this probable last chance for a semi-complete third film was wasted in trying to develop a "new generation" so as to milk the "franchise" for decades to come. We don't want a new generation. We want the OG three. Not as cameos, but as main characters as they should be through the whole film. Cobra Kai style. We want to see them in NYC again - there would have been a lot of humor in that with all the changes in culture and tech. In the hands of even a minimally capable production team, we would have gotten one heck of a sequel. Instead, we get a straight to Netflix borefest.
American Factory (2019)
Watchable but not re-watchable
Missed opportunities both for a more entertaining film and at a philosophical level. The access of the filmmakers seemed very, very extensive. It could have been a Roger & Me, only with Michael Moore having a second film crew in the inner sanctum of Roger and his full cooperation.
This low quality of filmmaking given the subject matter would have been better deployed as a half-hour short film.
Day of the Dead (2021)
You've got to be kidding me
Paint by numbers zombie effort. They succeeded in one thing: making the zombies more sympathetic as protagonists than the living cast. In the right hands this theme could be a powerful satire, but in this case it is purely accidental.
Halloween (2018)
Forgettable garbage
I'm a fan of the first film (1978). The second one is a classic in its own way, by slasher standards. The rest of them are at least campy and fun enough to have in the background. This 2018 remake almost ruins the whole series. Very poorly-written, no respect for atmosphere, sitcom-level character development. An appalling waste of resources.
Ojing-eo geim (2021)
Should be banned.
Gratuitous violence. And we wonder why the world is in the state it is in. Trivializing atrocity by juxtaposing callous murder with cheerful music. Sick.
The Good Doctor (2017)
Good first episode. That's it.
The first episode reels the viewer in. Though clumsily done, the main character is sympathetic. The second and third episodes are the usual formulaic rubbish, and if you've seen them you've seen the whole series on repeat. Low-effort melodrama, one-note supporting characters, and plot twists that can be forecasted during the first minute.
Mommy (2014)
10 minutes of plot stretched over 130 minutes
This film drags. And drags. There is a lot of shouting and make-ups. The director/writer was only 24 - which is possible when, like him, one of your parents is already a successful actor in the business. Pity talented 24 year olds without the rocket launch of nepotism didn't get a chance to make something better with the five million dollars used to make this film, not to mention the distribution and marketing resources.
The 1:1 aspect ratio is a pretentious annoyance that adds nothing to the viewing experience, to put it mildly.
The most moving moments are cheats since they piggy-back on the artistry and nostalgia of popular songs - ones which were certainly not composed for the soundtrack. A good film is enhanced by a score, and doesn't need to resort of the cheap trick of acting as a top 40 DJ to compensate for weaknesses in the screenplay.
That aside, the acting is convincing, in a documentary sort of way - at least the acting of the crazed mommy and psychopathic son. One doesn't doubt their mental illnesses for a moment.
If the intention of this production had been to create a message or a work of art, this would have been a wonderful ten minute short film on Youtube.
Wireless (2020)
Brilliant, original, gripping series
I don't get the bad reviews. Maybe they were expecting another high-budget Marvel CGI fest, or another tired retread. I binged it and enjoyed it immensely.
This one is original. Not a reboot, sequel, prequel, or re-imagining. Going in I knew nothing except it was about a young man in a survival situation with a diminishing phone battery. It turned out to be more than that. Very suspenseful, and for the thoughtful, might leave you thinking about how you relate to others even after it's over.
If you like more than mindless, formulaic big studio fare, then give this one a shot.
History of the World in 2 Hours (2011)
Garbage
The history of the world in the format of a 90 minute Michael Bay film trailer. Annoying narration, constant 21st century stock footage constantly interrupting any sense of chronology, and irrelevant interviews with modern talking heads. All the facts should be in the script with all visuals staying in sync.
The Imposter (2012)
Another documentary ruined by an incompetent narrative
Everything is revealed in the first few minutes, so there is no need to watch further than that. A competent documentary filmmaker would have left the identity of the "found" boy mysterious, and let the viewer take the point of view of the family. And therefore empathize with them, while trying to solve the puzzle as more and more information is slowly revealed in the actual chronological order that it did at the time.
This would have been both entertaining and educational. But also beyond the grasp of these filmmakers, unfortunately.
Instead, they interview the imposter from the very beginning who does the full walk through in a tedious manner so there's no mystery or mystique about anything.
Wild Wild Country (2018)
Ruined in the first ten minutes
I had never heard of this religious project. A lot of wonderful tension is built up in the first minutes, with the arrival of the Rolls Royce, then showing the guru arrive. This is then obliterated when they show him in handcuffs and show clips of police talking about their crimes. Then the chronology is further imploded by a switch to Tom Brokow talking about one of them being wanted. Ruins the tension immediately and further reason to watch it. I'll just read the Wikipedia page for the rest.
Pontypool (2008)
Truly dire
The first thing you'll notice is the horrifically incompetent sound editing. A lot of random volume changes - apparently unintentional. Terrible elevator music that drowns out the inane and poorly-delivered dialogue. A cast all of whom have annoying voices - like fingernails on a chalkboard. A moronic story, implausible at every step - and unrealistic too (not the same thing, yet this film suffers on both counts). The basic premise has promise: an infection unfolding outside of a lonely radio studio. I think this premise could be made into a good story without much effort. Yet this crew managed to bungle it in every possible way. Not even bad enough to be cringe. Just awful.
The New Pope (2020)
Boring, Self-Conscious, No Subtlety
The New Pope is the opposite of the Young Pope series. Whereas the Young Pope was entertaining, hip, and elusive, the New Pope is boring, self-conscious, and without subtlety.
The trailer is much better than the whole series with all episodes taken together. Malkovich is dire. Terrible, grating accent, with excruciating monologues full of inane platitudes (may as well open up Youtube and watch a snoozer from a real pope). Jude Law's Pope Pius XIII - brilliant in the previous season - appears only for a short time in this one, and as a much diminished character. It's like Arnold in Terminator Dark Fate vs. Arnold in T1.
If you really must watch this self-indulgent dumpster fire, then I recommend only the first and last episodes. Thank me later.
P.S. - They must have a different person choosing the music this season. All the new choices suck. The best music this season is lifted straight from the soundtrack of the last season, only made worse by bizarre editing.
The New Pope: Episode #1.8 (2020)
Justifies the previous bad episodes
One should watch episode 1, then skip to episode 8. The ones in between are dire, but this one returns to form of The Young Pope.
The New Pope: Episode #1.5 (2020)
Garbage
As someone who gives The Young Pope 10/10 stars, it is sad that the New Pope is so vastly inferior to the point of being insulting to the viewer. The first episode of the New Pope was very good and in the spirit of the original series. The second and third episodes were dire. The fourth episode showed hopeful signs of recovery, but now with this fifth episode, it is doubtful that this series as a whole can be rated higher than two or three stars. John Malkovich was horribly miscast as an English gentleman. His accent is grating, delivery terrible, and he's just a boring and long-winded character I have come to dread when he comes on screen for his long, unrealistic, and unfulfilling monologues in imitation of a much diminished and humourless Tyrion Lannister. Whereas I looked forward eagerly to each episode of the Young Pope, this one is real work to trundle through. This is the first episode where there wasn't a single entertaining moment. The dancing routine (as in the end credits) is wearing thin. It's old hat by now, and was most effective when used sparingly. Oh well, I suppose this definitely proves that the Young Pope's genius was mostly by accident of converging circumstances, and not a success to be repeated.
The New Pope: Episode #1.3 (2020)
Even worse than the previous episode.
I loved the Young Pope, and the New Pope's first episode was entertaining with all the hallmarks of the previous serious. It took a nosedive however with the second episode (Malovich's boring and inaccurate character, and self-indulgent though boring surrealism) and this one is even worse than the last one. In fact, this is the first episode of both series that I had to skip forward a bit through (the b-plot with the woman and baby). Not much quality control this season. And Meghan Markle references - not just once but multiple times? I suppose this may retrospectively turn out to be this franchise's shark jump.
The New Pope: Episode #1.2 (2019)
Underwhelming with Factual Errors
I adored the Young Pope - and enjoyed the first episode of the New Pope. Yet this one was weak. With so much self-conscious quirkiness, this episode entered The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou territory, though without the payoff.
Malkovich, while a wonderful actor, is misplaced in this role. He's utterly unconvincing as an upper-class Englishman, sane or not. His accent is obviously fake and grating, recalling Tyrion Lannister's voice (another comically-bad English accent by an American actor). As the son of a duke, he would be Lord John Brannox, not Sir John Brannox - though in reality he is John, Cardinal Brannox. "Sir John" refers to a baronet or knight not entitled to a higher style. Since he is apparently the only son of this duke, he'd more likely have a courtesy title (likely in the grade of marquess or earl, though not exclusively those), and be known as Lord Titlename. His parents, meanwhile, would be the Duke and Duchess of some placename, not Duke and Duchess Brannox. This is not arcane knowledge and could be learned in a quick web search, so there is no valid excuse for the writers being ignorant of such vital knowledge which would have lent much-needed authenticity to what appears to be a new lead character.
"Sir John" is dressed like an Edwardian aristocrat without explanation despite being a very senior churchman. In 2020, this would be well beyond a mere eccentricity, and worthy not only of constant comment, but sectioning. This dress alone would disqualify him out of hand for consideration as head of any responsible enterprise, and certainly as head of the RC Church. Laughable that the Vatican Secretary of State would come cap-in-hand to beg such a loon to "accept" the Papacy, especially on the pretense that he personifies moderation.
We can only hope that most of this episode--at least all of it involving the ludicrous visit to the country house--is part of Lenny's fevered dream sequence, and not a portrayal of canonical events in the serial.
The Crown: Coup (2019)
Unrealistic
Not historical, and the acting/script was unable even to convincingly lie.
The Crown: Olding (2019)
Jumped the Shark
Seasons 1 and 2 were not the best by any means, but they had their moments, especially the first season. This season is trash. History is contorted to extreme degrees to make the simple-minded plot arc work (that one can see the resolution of from miles away), and the casting and dialogue are atrocious. None of the characters are convincing even for a moment. None of them disappear into their roles.
Even Lithgow, who was previously a very good Churchill, phones in his hammy performance (in a ludicrous scene that dramatically overestimates the relationship between the queen and Churchill - as if he were a kindly grandfather living in the attic.
Olivia Colman, really? An insult to the viewers not only to cast someone who doesn't resemble the queen at any stage of her long life, but to not even bother to do her hair as she really wore it in the 60s (look it up).
Lazy, incompetent film making. The only thing going for it are some of the locations and scenery (though not all - the art poster featured looks like it was for an art exhibition in 2019, not the mid-60s).