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Reviews
Before We Go (2014)
Not sure what it wants to be
Starts out as a "Meet Cute", then wanders into a "all night adventure caper", then a romance drama, interspliced with whiny indie music and chat fests. The two characters are not particularly likeable, so you don't have any kind of feeling for their developing relationship. Which brings us to the end SPOLIER ALERT!!!, there is no relationship. It started nowhere, went nowhere, ended nowhere.
Had to apologize to the wife for this pick. Hopefully, she can one day in the distant future trust me again after this awful, boring, pointless tragedy of a movie night.
Chris, do us a favor and stay in FRONT of the camera.....and in the weight room. You looks ill when not Cap.
The Bear (2022)
Calm down everyone, it's not that amazing
I feel the need to balance out the reviews here and give potential viewers reasonable expectations. About 4 episodes into season 2 and not sure why I'm still watching it. The storyline(s) drag on and become stale. Some of the characters are so annoyingly loud and obnoxious that it makes me want to just turn it off at times. The show would have us believe that a running a dumpy sandwich shop is the equivalent of running a Fortune 500 company and being a chef (at a dumpy sandwich shop) is the equivalent being a tortured starving artist. I'm a foodie and want to tell these weirdos "Relax! It's just food". Not a comedy at all, straight up drama.
Yellowstone: Cigarettes, Whiskey, a Meadow and You (2022)
ThE PresIDEnt wiLL mURDer yoUR DoG!!!
Some other reviewers have mentioned YS potentially "jumping the shark" this season. Well, in my humble opinion it's already happened.
Each episode has Beth doing something so incredibly bonkers that her family would consider putting her on a 5150 hold. The main star of the show now comes across as an bumbling fool. Other cast member story arcs have become so tedious slow that I've started hoping for something terrible to happen to them just to move the plot along.
Lastly, the Secret Service came to the The Res prior to the POTUS visit, so they started shooting all of the dogs in town. The SHARK HAS BEEN JUMPED!!!
Sad YS devolved into such a goofy soap opera.
Murder Mystery 2 (2023)
May god have mercy on your soul.
What we've just watched is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever seen. At no point in this rambling, incoherent movie were they even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone that watched this movie is now dumber for having seen it. I award it 1 star and may God have mercy on their souls.
What we've just watched is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever seen. At no point in this rambling, incoherent movie were they even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone that watched this movie is now dumber for having seen it. I award it 1 star and may God have mercy on their souls.
1923 (2022)
Sleazy Western Paperback
Are you in the need for Harlequin novel romance, gratuitous violence & subpar acting? Well step right up and win some crap!!!
1923 has the makings of a well-crafted program, but is undone by it's reliance on love scenes and brutality. It would have you believe that the vast majority of people alive in 1923 are insane, sadistic psychopaths. Too many examples to even list! Waiting for the reveal that the catholics are actually demons wearing skinsuits.
To write an entire season of a program with multiple story lines and never come close to tying them together is an insult to the viewer. How anyone could watch this drivel then return for more is beyond me.
Lastly, pretty much every scene that took place in "Africa" was ridiculously stupid.
Mayfair Witches (2023)
I'll never understand...
....why producers, writers, etc. Want to change existing stories. It's pretty simple, take what's on the page and put it on screen. NOPE!!! Just like 'Y: The Last Man', 'World War Z' & 'Interview/Vampire', this is a sad knockoff of a terrific story.
Actors are good, scenery is nice, but the storytelling and character revisions suck. It's not as bad as the new 'Interview w/ a Vampire', but not even on the same level as the plethora of shows NETFLIX releases on a weekly basis. There are just too many options out there to produce garbage like this.
I had set my expectations low, but still disappointed. Perhaps, when it gets cancelled, someone else will take a shot at it and get it right, similar to what happened with 'Suicide Squad'.
Elvis (2022)
Not a biopic
This film was not a biographical movie of Elvis. It was a 2.5 hour summary of Elvis' on stage career and Colonel Parker's involvement in it. Took a lot of liberty with embellishing stories and at times telling stories that never even happened. Which is weird when you have an endless supply of fascinating true stories at your disposal. I was excited to learn something about Elvis and some of the crazy antics of his life, nut none of this is touched. Probably should of been called "ELVIS! Brought to you by Colonel Parker".
Some very odd music choices and no shot lasted longer than a second or two. There are so many cuts that if you blinked you'd miss a whole scene.
Good for background noise, would not recommend to anyone. Struggled to finish it.
Obi-Wan Kenobi (2022)
Never been excited for a series before...
...and learned a valuable lesson. Expectation is the root of all heartache.
Each episode is a silly series of close calls and unlikely escapes. It treats the viewer as an idiot and adds nothing to the story that came before it and s#!ts on the story that came after it.
Would love to be able to ask the show runners how they could put such little effort into this. It's sad to see something that I've somehow managed to have an emotional attachment to be used as a cheap tool to get subscriptions.
Crossing my fingers this review will actually get posted.
Y: The Last Man (2021)
Fans of graphic novel can pass on it.
I know, I know...everyone always says "the book is better". Well in this case the graphic novel was a whole different story. Spent two hours watching something that in no way resembled the books I read years ago. It's as if the writers/producers tried to tell the same story without the humor, fun or excitement that made the original so good. If you are adapting a graphic novel for a show just film it scene for scene and you've got a hit. Doesn't make any sense!!!
The Killing of a Sacred Deer (2017)
"MOM! BOB'S DYING! "
This film is hilarious. Start to finish it's full of one ridiculous scene after the next. Can I have your mp3 player when you die?
Good lord, the stupidity. SMH.