versen Reviews

Future Cop (1976–1977)

officer Haven and his crusty mentor

[7/10 · 30 December 2006]

I remember watching this show when I was a kid. The android, Haven, behaved as if he regarded Ernest Borgnine as his father, and there was one episode in which he nearly "died."

Somewhat vaguely, I recall that critics at TV guide derided it as a ripoff of the 6 million dollar man at the time, but I didn't see it that way.

I also remember when Star Trek The Next Generation came out in the 80s how I was reminded of Haven, who was written similarly to Data in the latter series: somewhat befuddled by the intangibles of "human culture" and always trying to master them. Borgnine would call Haven "kid" and Haven once asked if it was because he was manufactured so recently. I couldn't remember the name of the show at the time, just "that show about the robot cop" from my childhood.

Maybe the show wasn't successful because it seemed to concentrate on the relationship between Haven and Borgnine more than on the typical cops-n-robbers action themes of a police drama, and people weren't really ready for something like that, a sci-fi show that wasn't set in outer space, so to speak.

Mansquito (2005 TV Movie)

grade-z, sure, but perversely compelling

[5/10 · 13 March 2005]

undoubtedly you've seen the previews on sci-fi which show the sexy scientist tearing off her blouse-- that and the title tell you all you need to know about how cheesy and ridiculous this picture is-- but I hate to admit I found it strangely watchable. Corin Nemec plays a positively Beowulfian cop who tussles repeatedly with the mansquito but somehow survives each time, while(numerous) lesser men and women die within a few tenths of a second of their 'squito encounters. The story hurtles forward at a breathless pace,which is undoubtedly a good thing considering how silly it is. The heroine is also infected by radioactive skeeter juice(hence her need to disrobe(?), and she figures out that Only She can lure Mansquito to his doom...and you can probably guess the rest.

Look: obviously no one watches a teevee movie called "Mansquito!"(it needed an exclamation point, don't you think?) expecting King Lear, unless they have neurological problems or something. Mansquito! is the cinematic equivalent of cheese nachos: you hate to admit you occasionally crave because you know they're nutritional gargbage-- good in a bad way. And gee, I didn't know mosquitos growl.