Doris Wishman (the film maker), in this film, managed to do the impossible, something that I thought couldn't be done. She made nudity *boring*! The movie is little more than scenes of naked people in the outdoors, doing mundane things like lounging around the swimming pool, strolling by the pond, playing chess... Zzzzzzzzzz. And since this was 1960, there's no full frontal nudity anywhere. The only part that really got me interested was "Leslie" demonstrating her swimming prowess in the pool. The rest of the film has the flimsiest of plots, something about Belle Starr wanting to get away from it all by escaping to the nudist camp every weekend, as her weasel-like fiancé/manager gets more and more irate. In the end, it all works out -- the final scene, the final meeting with the studio boss, was amusing (though I saw that one coming).
Reviews
15 Reviews
Trekkies
(1997)
This movie worries me.
30 September 2005
First off, I've been a fan of Star Trek since the original series. I have a poster of the Enterprise-E on one wall above my computer. I have my own Starfleet uniform in my closet, which I wear on Halloween and the occasional Star Trek or SF convention.
A friend of mine gave this movie to me on video as a Christmas gift. And, frankly, the movie scared the hell out of me. All I could think of while watching it is that there are some seriously twisted people out there who are in dire need of professional help. Okay, the dentist who had his office done up like a Star Trek facility was fun. Business is business, after all. But on the other hand we had the woman who showed up for jury duty in a Starfleet uniform.
Yes, Star Trek was, in some of its incarnations, an excellent television series (though I thought Voyager was a total waste of airtime). But that's all it is -- a television show, one of several that I've watched and enjoyed over the years.
Unfortunately, movies such as Trekkies only serve to work against Star Trek and its fans in the long run -- people will watch this film, see how deranged many of its fans are, and conclude that Star Trek fans are a bunch of weirdos. And those of us, like myself, who do not take it to the ridiculous extremes depicted in this film, will nonetheless be lumped into the same category as those who do.
In short, movies like this almost make me ashamed to admit that I am a Star Trek fan, because of how Trek fans are depicted.
On the other hand, the film was well put together, I have to give it that...
A friend of mine gave this movie to me on video as a Christmas gift. And, frankly, the movie scared the hell out of me. All I could think of while watching it is that there are some seriously twisted people out there who are in dire need of professional help. Okay, the dentist who had his office done up like a Star Trek facility was fun. Business is business, after all. But on the other hand we had the woman who showed up for jury duty in a Starfleet uniform.
Yes, Star Trek was, in some of its incarnations, an excellent television series (though I thought Voyager was a total waste of airtime). But that's all it is -- a television show, one of several that I've watched and enjoyed over the years.
Unfortunately, movies such as Trekkies only serve to work against Star Trek and its fans in the long run -- people will watch this film, see how deranged many of its fans are, and conclude that Star Trek fans are a bunch of weirdos. And those of us, like myself, who do not take it to the ridiculous extremes depicted in this film, will nonetheless be lumped into the same category as those who do.
In short, movies like this almost make me ashamed to admit that I am a Star Trek fan, because of how Trek fans are depicted.
On the other hand, the film was well put together, I have to give it that...
Riverworld
(2003 TV Movie)
Better than I expected
12 January 2004
First off, I'll say for the record that I am a big fan of the novels. And I liked this movie. It wasn't great, but it was enjoyable. Many of the criticisms are from fans of the books who complain that the movie isn't faithful to the source material. I say, so what? Books are books, movies are movies, and sometimes changes need to be made to adapt to the medium through which the story is told. Given the constraints of the medium, I thought the movie told its story very well. The ending leaves things open for more; if there are more Riverworld movies (or even a series), I'll be watching.
(Though I did have a little problem with there being horses on the Riverworld...)
(Though I did have a little problem with there being horses on the Riverworld...)
Candy the Stripper
(1983 Video)
Cheap in more ways than one
10 August 2002
The owner of a seedy, run-down strip club in New Orleans tries to save the building from being torn down by having it declared a historical landmark. The architect who visits in order to inspect the building, not realizing that its main use is as a joint so seedy that "dive" would be a step up, falls in love with the club's headline stripper (played by former Playboy centerfold Tracy Vaccaro). This mundo cheapo comedy looks like it was shot on home video. The performances are as wooden as a forest, the dialogue is trite, the sets are cheap... I have to wonder how small this film's budget was, since it didn't look like it cost anything. On the up side, there's quite a bit of nudity, and Tracy Vaccaro still looks great ten years after doing her bit in Playboy. But unless you're a die-hard fan of Ms. Vaccaro (which I must admit, I am), this one is not worth your time.
Series 7: The Contenders
(2001)
Interesting premise, lousy execution
9 August 2002
(pardon the pun) A sendup of the "reality" television that has been polluting our airwaves. The setup is, a half-dozen people have to kill each other until only one is left, all while being followed by a TV camera crew. This could have been much better than it actually turned out, but wooden performances and hackneyed scripting made this one fall flat on its face. I've seen better acting in junior-high stage productions. Maybe this was intentional. But the end result looks like something a bunch of untalented college kids produced for a film class.
Fargo
(1996)
Comedy? What comedy?
29 April 2002
Warning: Spoilers
(Includes spoilers)
First off, I've heard this one billed as a dark comedy. Personally, I didn't find the film the least bit funny, except for a few humourous bits here and there. I did, however, find this film to be very well crafted, engrossing, and overall excellent in all respects. In short, I loved this film. But I wouldn't call it a comedy...
William H. Macy gives an outstanding performance as a car salesman whose plot to get some instant cash (which he desparately needs to get out of debt) goes terribly awry. Equally outstanding was Frances McDormand as the small-town police chief who puts all the pieces together.
One final comment: Many people have questioned the scene in which
Marge Gunderson (McDormand) has a drink with an old high-school classmate, saying the scene was pointless and unnecessary. I disagree. (Here's where the spoiler comes in.) Up until then, Marge was taking Jerry Lundegaard's (Macy) story at face value. Then she has a drink with Mike, who tells her about how he married someone they both knew from high school, who died of lukemia a year ago, and he is so lonely now... The next morning, Marge finds out that Mike's sob story was a load of bull, and she swallowed it hook-line-and-sinker. It is then that she starts to suspect that maybe Lundegaard's story wasn't completely on the up-and-up. It's the experience with Mike, and her subsequent discovery that she was easily fooled, that plants the seeds of doubt in her mind about Lundegaard.
(Just had to say that.)
First off, I've heard this one billed as a dark comedy. Personally, I didn't find the film the least bit funny, except for a few humourous bits here and there. I did, however, find this film to be very well crafted, engrossing, and overall excellent in all respects. In short, I loved this film. But I wouldn't call it a comedy...
William H. Macy gives an outstanding performance as a car salesman whose plot to get some instant cash (which he desparately needs to get out of debt) goes terribly awry. Equally outstanding was Frances McDormand as the small-town police chief who puts all the pieces together.
One final comment: Many people have questioned the scene in which
Marge Gunderson (McDormand) has a drink with an old high-school classmate, saying the scene was pointless and unnecessary. I disagree. (Here's where the spoiler comes in.) Up until then, Marge was taking Jerry Lundegaard's (Macy) story at face value. Then she has a drink with Mike, who tells her about how he married someone they both knew from high school, who died of lukemia a year ago, and he is so lonely now... The next morning, Marge finds out that Mike's sob story was a load of bull, and she swallowed it hook-line-and-sinker. It is then that she starts to suspect that maybe Lundegaard's story wasn't completely on the up-and-up. It's the experience with Mike, and her subsequent discovery that she was easily fooled, that plants the seeds of doubt in her mind about Lundegaard.
(Just had to say that.)
Great, except for one thing...
16 March 2002
This is the one Bond film I've had difficulty watching. In fact, until recently it was the one Bond film that I'd never seen; every time I tried watching it, seeing George Lazenby as Bond ruined for me, and I turned it off. I finally forced myself to stick with it when it played on cable recently. And you know what? It's actually pretty good.
Plot-wise, it's one of the better Bond films. Lots of action, good-looking Bond girls, and an excellent supporting cast that includes Diana Rigg and Telly Savalas. Had this one starred either Sean Connery or Roger Moore, it would likely gone down as one of the best Bond films ever.
But it starred George Lazenby, in his one and only outing as Bond, James Bond. And, to be blunt, Lazenby was totally wrong for the part. His performance in this film makes Timothy Dalton's Bond seem outstanding by comparison. There's already been one Bond "remake": Never Say Never Again was essentially a Thunderball retread. I'd like to see this one given a makeover with Pierce Brosnan; it would very likely be a winner.
In short, if you can get past Lazenby's awful performance as Bond, it's worth staying through. But IMO that's asking a lot.
Plot-wise, it's one of the better Bond films. Lots of action, good-looking Bond girls, and an excellent supporting cast that includes Diana Rigg and Telly Savalas. Had this one starred either Sean Connery or Roger Moore, it would likely gone down as one of the best Bond films ever.
But it starred George Lazenby, in his one and only outing as Bond, James Bond. And, to be blunt, Lazenby was totally wrong for the part. His performance in this film makes Timothy Dalton's Bond seem outstanding by comparison. There's already been one Bond "remake": Never Say Never Again was essentially a Thunderball retread. I'd like to see this one given a makeover with Pierce Brosnan; it would very likely be a winner.
In short, if you can get past Lazenby's awful performance as Bond, it's worth staying through. But IMO that's asking a lot.
Swingers
(1996)
Yawn.
22 September 2001
A film about a bunch of struggling actors in Hollywood out to get laid. The focus is on Mike, who's still getting over the breakup of a long-term relationship, and whose best buddy Trent is trying to get him back into the dating scene. The performances aren't bad, and there's some great neo-swing music on the soundtrack, but I lost count of the number of times I said to myself "I saw that one coming" whenever something happened in the way of plot development. Worse, it's so blatantly trying to be cool and hip that a neon sign reading "Hey! We're hip!" would have been more subtle. Not a bad way to waste an afternoon if there's nothing on TV, but not one to run out and rent either.
Manos: The Hands of Fate
(1966)
Aieeeeee!
22 September 2001
Forget Plan Nine From Outer Space... if any movie deserves the crown as "Worst Movie Of All Time", it's this one. Not even watching it filtered through MST3K made it bearable. I gave it a "1" on the IMDB voting list, only because the ratings don't go into negative numbers. This one inexplicably has a cult following... avoid this one at all costs, unless you for some reason feel the need to punish yourself.
Jurassic Park III
(2001)
A worthy sequel
29 July 2001
Third Jurassic Park movie is better than the second, not quite as good as the first. Dr. Alan Grant (Sam Neill) returns to the series, hired by a couple (William Macy, Téa Leoni) who want to overfly the island... but they have ulterior motives. Predictably, the plane crashes, and they have to get off. The plot is a bit more complex than that, but not much. The dinosaur sequences are spectacularly rendered, and the performances -- particularly Macy and Leoni as the clueless couple -- are well done. Overall, definitely a worthy summer matinée type of film.
Guardian Angel
(1994 Video)
Yecch (SPOILERS)
29 July 2001
Warning: Spoilers
A female ex-cop who was drummed out of the force for recklessness (and who could probably beat Chuck Norris in a fight) hires herself out as a private bodyguard; her first client is a worthless playboy type. It takes half the movie for her to get kicked off the force in the first place. Lots of great fight choreography but the plot is strictly by the numbers, and the acting is as wooden as the dialogue. Give this one a miss.
The Creeping Terror
(1964 TV Movie)
Yecch-o!
29 July 2001
An alien spacecraft crashlands in rural California somewhere, and its inhabitant, a carpet monster with rubber hoses sticking out of it, crawls (ahem, creeps) around devouring the locals, who oblige the monster by not running away when it appears, then crawling into its mouth when it attacks. One of the silliest movie monsters of all time, with the usual low production values expected from this type of film. Something must have happened to the sound in post-production, since most of the dialogue was replaced by a dull-sounding narrator, and what little dialogue remains is often out of synch with the actors' mouths. (Watch for the scene in which the voice of the female character on the screen is heard but it's one of the men whose lips are moving!) Overall, one of the funnier "bad movies" out there.
Nightfall
(1988)
AAAAAAAARRRRGGGHHH!
28 July 2001
This is truly one of the worst films I have ever seen. If only I'd had the foresight to check this stinker's IMDB entry before renting it, I could have saved myself an agonizing 90 minutes. This one takes nothing more from Asimov's classic story than the title and the idea of a planet where the suns set once in a thousand years. Beyond that, the story and the movie have nothing in common... and the movie itself is bad. Bad, bad, bad. Bad acting, bad dialogue, bad costumes, bad sets, bad everything. This piece of crap is 90 minutes of my life that I will never get back.
Manos: The Hands of Fate
(1966)
The horror... the horror...
3 June 2001
This is, without a doubt, the worst movie I have ever seen. Even viewed through the MST3K filter almost wasn't enough. Was it the bad acting? The bad script? The bad sound? The hilariously tacky music? It was all of the above. Small wonder that no one who appeared in this film ever appeared in anything else.
Fatherland
(1994 TV Movie)
Happy ending?
15 October 2000
Warning: Spoilers
SPOILER ALERT! SPOILER ALERT! SPOILER ALERT!
A few users have commented on how they changed the ending of the book to make it a happy ending for the movie? Excuse me? Xavier dies and Charlie gets picked up by the Gestapo never to be seen again? This is a happy ending??? A real Hollywood-style "happy ending" would have had both Xavier and Charlie get to the American Embassy and leave Germania to live happily ever after in the United States, which the movie looked like it was leading up to.
Happy ending? Yeah, right.
A few users have commented on how they changed the ending of the book to make it a happy ending for the movie? Excuse me? Xavier dies and Charlie gets picked up by the Gestapo never to be seen again? This is a happy ending??? A real Hollywood-style "happy ending" would have had both Xavier and Charlie get to the American Embassy and leave Germania to live happily ever after in the United States, which the movie looked like it was leading up to.
Happy ending? Yeah, right.
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