rabishopp Reviews

The Secret War of Jackie's Girls (1980 TV Movie)

Interesting idea but....

[5 December 2003]

Spoilers ahead...

There's no denying the idea was good and the ladies look positively lovely. However, this film is clearly intended to be a pilot (no pun intended) for a TV series, perhaps a WWII version of Charlie' Angels.

While set in England, the film was quite clearly made in California. The house the heroines live in is not typical of a British country house. The leader of the group, points to a map of England and says, "We're here", pointing clearly to somewhere north of Birmingham. Later on, during a bombing raid, the girls say, "oh, Portsmouth is getting it again" or something similar. Being based somewhere like Derby, how would they know!! The use of stock footage is rather surprising, particularly from the classic movie/documentary, "The Battle of Britain" and others.

All that said, the chopper flying sequences are quite good. And there's some reasonable excitement with machine guns, grenades and fights with the evil Nazis.

Dreamcatcher (2003)

Spoilers...Most odd movie...

[31 July 2003]

* SPOILERS AHEAD *

This is one strange movie. I didn't read the Stephen King book and I was surprised to see he was listed as the author of the original work.

The film has both elements of Alien and a movie I saw from the 1970s where giant maggots infest peoples apartments coming out the waste pipes - baths and entering certain orifices. Forget the name of the movie. In that respect, this is nothing new. The 1970s movie actually did it better. I was gratified to see the usual aliens (stereotyped in say Stargate SG-1 as being beneficial) get a makeover as the nasties. The alien worms were pretty good. This could end up being made into a TV series of the usual type - lone gunman versus the alien invaders. The only problem is that it's all been done before. Stephen King is usually referred to as a master of the horror genre. This was 2nd rate science fiction for sure.

And as for the Lenoid Brezhnev eyebrows of Morgan Freeman, well, probably the most entertaining aspect to the film.

My Big Fat Greek Wedding (2002)

It could have been different...

[15 May 2003]

Spoilers ahead...

A tremendously hyped movie with wooden acting. It is obvious that the lead character Toula was not a seasoned professional actress. Several times during this movie I thought I was watching a TV sitcom. The stage production pedigree is rather easy to see. The direction was fragmented and the jokes became tired very quickly. Indeed the whole thing reminded me of some sort of student film makers end of term project. This movie could quite easily have been called My Big Fat Ethnic Stereotype Wedding - insert whichever stereotype you desire. Nothing special about Greek families.

I was surprised to see Rita Wilson and Tom Hanks mentioned on the credits as producers. Knowing that Rita Wilson is half-Greek obviously gave a lot of legitimacy. Without Hanks and Wilson's involvement this movie could not have been made.

Nothing special. 3/10.

Starquest II (1996 Video)

Well.....spoilers ahead...

[30 November 2002]

Lame movie with no redeeming features apart from the scantily clad ladies. Gruesomely bad. I know lots of wannabees want to be in movies, whatever the cost, whatever the story and whatever whatever. Just don't be in things like this. Do something else.

Submarine X-1 (1968)

Routine 1960s War Film

[24 November 2002]

Routine and quite boring 1960s war film concentrating on the X-series of midget submarines. In this typical afternoon matinee movie James Caan appears as a totally miserable and humourless Canadian submarine commander. Presumably Caan appears to make the film saleable in North America. The underwater scenes and onshore action don't add up to much but the occasional glimpses of scenery around the Scottish lochs makes marginally for some of the tedium. The shoot out with German paratroopers has some tension and excitement. Overall, one for rainy, cold, wintery Sunday afternoons. 3/10.

Cast Away (2000)

One big ad for Fedex...

[7/10 · 14 February 2001]

This film just about takes the biscuit for product placement. From the first second to the end take we're under pressure to believe Fedex is the best thing ever to hit Planet Earth. We learn all about the Fedex methods, how packages are rushed from A to B and Tom lends his full weight to getting the Fedex message over, even to those disorganised Russians. The Fedex theme is skilfully woven through the whole film, with presumably Wilson contributing with basketballs ad infinitum. The Fedex packages keeping poor Tom alive. For those who ship by Fedex, UPS and others like DHL, I was particularly amused by Helen Hunt's cautionary references to "undeclared hazardous goods" being the probably cause of the plane crash. Heaven forbid, pilot error or some other employee disaster. And of course, Tom at the end shows how Fedex delivers regardless, as he appears on Fedex TV, with Fedex planes reaching as far as the horizon. As usual Helen Hunt is a miserable mess. How she managed to get into movies, well, enough said.

On the other hand, ignoring the Fedex overdose, Tom pulls the whole thing together and makes the movie. I was truly moved when he apologised to his escaping basketball.

Zemeckis must be one of the most talented directors who ever lived and Hanks is going to be a true legend. I can only hope the Hanks - Zemeckis partnership will strike gold again.

Last Lives (1997)

Good idea .......

[5/10 · 13 February 2001]

They should remake this film, perhaps with a different cast, perhaps with the same one but at least another few million in the budget. The story is interesting enough to deserve a makeover. It's been done before - LA Takedown and Heat for example. I'd grade this a "C+" and a "could try harder".

Wing Commander (1999)

Not bad at all......

[7/10 · 31 January 2001]

Not a bad movie at all. Better than one would think. Great special effects and good battle scenes. The sets were a bit tacky but it had potential. Not so far removed from reality. I never saw the video game so it was a new story to me. It looked a bit like Space: Above and Beyond. I reckon there was even scope for a TV series. I presume it was made in Oz as there was a lot of Antipodeans/Brits in it (and it was 20th Century Fox which has a stuido down there). However, the titles say it was made in Luxembourg ! If it had a slightly better script, more depth to the characters, it could have been a real classic. It was 70% of the way there.

Ronin (1998)

Thinking man's thriller....

[9/10 · 15 January 2001]

Fine cast, excellent storyline and super locations. After a diet of US bang-'em up movies, this movie has a nice and unusual feel these days of European culture. It's also good to see a strong European cast encompassing nationals from Sweden, the UK and France. de Niro and Reno work excellently together. It would great to see Reno and de Niro working together in Ronin II.

Nutty Professor II: The Klumps (2000)

Terrible.....

[3/10 · 27 October 2000]

This movie was the pits. Eddie Murphy thinks that he can be funny by talking loudly and using heavy accents. If an actor uses an accent, he could at least make sure his diction and pronunciation are intelligible to the audience. Half the message was lost on me. I couldn't understand hardly any of it. It was also crude, purile and humourless. Shame because Eddie's previous work wasn't bad at all. Lately, it's garbage.