chets808 Reviews

Little Miss Sunshine (2006)

What child acting can achieve when its right.

[8/10 · 13 June 2007]

Spoilers ahead, drive carefully.

LMS sports a superb cast playing misfits of suburbia. Kinnear, always good, is insufferable as the wanna-be Tony Robbins; Steve Carell is, well, Steve Carell, no one possesses better comic instincts these days, but his role here clearly points the way towards a successful future in semi-comic dramatic roles or maybe semi-dramatic comic roles (see Jim Carrey, Robin Williams, et. al.); Alan Arkin is successfully dusted off and reminds everyone why The Russians Are Coming was so damn funny in the first place. But its the two women in the film, Collette and the fresh, seemingly uncoached Abigail Breslen who center the film. They are the glue that holds these freaks (including the abyss staring son, Dwayne) together. The underlying ties that bind are obviously Collette's to pull, yet among this definite A-list of stars, portraying a B-list family, Abigail's Olive steals every scene she's in. There is absolute beauty and pureness to her focus and straight forward approach. You can tell her awkwardness, the way she stands, when she's busting with energy, her walk, are not products of endless child acting classes; her portrayal of Olive is spot on and never forced. Maybe its noticeable to fathers of daughters; but there are moments, faint sparkles of awkward innocence that can melt the surliest grouches. And, its funny. very funny. I absolutely love the irony at the pageant dance, with everyone appalled by the racy (read: too slutty) Superfreak dance, while the rest of them are engaging in thinly veiled (if at all) whore-training. Just put a pole on that stage, and the whole thing takes on a totally different connotation. LMS is focused. Tight. They don't veer too far of course. Its a "small" film, and good things come in "small" packages (even if the package is a fat suit): recommended.

The Break-Up (2006)

Both have done better.

[4/10 · 13 May 2007]

Retreading ground previously covered by many movies. Although Aniston is fetching even in doormat mode, Vince feels forced. They took pages not only from a myriad of other date movies but from movies in the two star's past. Case and point, Vince and his video game addiction is right out of Swingers. The biggest problem is the paper thin script they have to work with. Vince is not a guy you would want to make things work out with and his character is given few consolations. This movie will strike a chord with the young ones, or anyone who has novice relationship experience. Anyone whose been around for some time will quickly be bored, yet the movie is fairly watchable due to Jenny from the block. She nose how to make a scene look good. (Yes I know, it should have been spelled knows) :wink:

Runaway (1984)

Cops. Robots. Gene Simmons. A surefire win !

[5/10 · 31 May 2006]

SPOILER AHEAD.

"Ms. Shields, you're broadcasting on an electromagnetic frequency that the robot reads."

Its terrific techno-babble punking like this that makes this movie endlessly watchable. Let me just say that this isn't a 4 star movie. Unless they give stars for cheese. Its got that enticing Roadhouse quality that never gets old. So, if you're still reading this, you know you could go to 100 reviews and find plot details and the same-ole run down on all the fixings; so allow me to offer you my observations.

Runaway was made at a time when we were still a bit in awe of the possible tech-future. This now defunct movie premise allowed for imaginations to run wild and present silly adventures that future generations could pick apart and laugh at (think now). So here we go:

1. Why is there a special police force to chase down robots run amok ? Something tells me it wouldn't be a tough talking take no prisoners macho man like our good friend Ramsay. The first assignment is SO urgent, it requires our team to fly to the site in a helicopter so they can flip a switch on a caterpillar catcher. Um…OK. Great ! You've saved dozens of corn stalks !

2. Ramsay's partner, Karen, as a cop, wears a skirt and high heels. Just think about the absurdity of chasing down a perp in that get up.

3. I love the security guard in the office building who, for some inexplicable reason, knows about everything there is to know about their computer systems, down to the voice modifications on the computer system (he's not the I.T. guy, he's a security guard), then goes so far as to bust Ramsay's onions on police protocol. Something tells me a security guard wouldn't be getting in a cop's grill. I mean…he is the security guard ! Plus, (I know..beating a dead horse), why do they need that guy, if robots are doing all these kind of jobs in the future ?

4. And while we're on the subject, what kind of future were these guys envisioning when a robotic office sentry runs through the office with a zapping ray gun ? Talk about big brother…

5. Also, notice when Kirstie Alley expires at the restaurant, no one notices that she is thrown face down in the pool. They just keep eating !?

6. Plus, the scenes between Selleck and his child are cringeworthy.

Gene Simmons actually does a good job to not defile himself, however, I wish just once, during one of his close ups, he would break his ominous stare and stick his freakish tongue way out.

Despite all this, it's an enjoyable 90 minutes. Tom Selleck, Cynthia Rhodes and the rest do an admirable job in spite of the lame dialogue and foolish direction. The 1990s brought about a heavy dose of cynicism and we partially lost the fun in imagining what the future holds. Think about Escape from New York, the Terminator, Blade Runner, etc. They all asked us to think about the future. When done right, it can be very entertaining (Minority Report).

King Kong (2005)

Love, Primate Style.

[7/10 · 16 December 2005]

Call me a dissenter, if you think a 7 out of 10 is dissenting. A remake to be sure, and somewhat lost in the milieu of the era and story that KK was derived from. And while there are some magnificent action sequences, the rest of the movie is quite pedestrian. And maybe that's by design, however I doubt it, but the results are for sure: Kong emerges as the most fascinating character of the movie; with more emotion and pathos than any of the "heroes". Of all the talent on screen, he is the one that is able to most effectively require us, the audience to understand him; and in gaining our empathy, he stands tall not as misunderstood ape, but as guttureal love monkey. Chaka would be proud.

But you have to hand it to Peter Jackson. PJ constantly and consistently makes the right decisions for his movies. Thankfully Naomi Watts is given lots of screen time, but few lines. You don't want to ruin a good thing, you know. His team of CGI wizards work marvelous wonders and delight us time and time again. So much so, I felt like a patron in the grand auditorium in the 3rd act, gasping at the spectacular sights they conjured up. A lot of other decisions are made just right; with Kong, with the actors and their on-screen counterparts. No one busts out to try and outdo the big ape; and you just gotta love the big lug, I mean, what a heart he has. It must be huge ! Can you imagine the size of that thing !?! worth seeing on the big screen; you'll be oohing and ahhing the whole time. that's ooh and ahh, like during a fireworks show, not ooh-ooh-ahh-ahh like a monkey.

The Ski Trip (2004)

Makes "straight to video" titles look like Citizen Kane.

[1/10 · 20 July 2005]

Channel surfing and caught this on LOGO. It was one of those "I have to watch this because it's so horribly bad" moments, like Roadhouse without the joy. The writing is atrocious; completely inane and the acting is throw-up-in-your-mouth bad.

There's low budget and then there is the abyss which is where this epic should be tossed and never seen from again. I mean, the main characters go to a ski retreat in some rented house and the house is, well, ordinary which is no big deal, but they choose to show all the houseguests pouring over it like it was the Sistine Chapel. I'm sorry but watching 6 guys stare into every 10'x10' boring room with a futon in it and gushing is lame. I guess they didn't learn anything from the Bad News Bears in Breaking Training (see hotel room check scene)...wow a toilet !!! yaayyyyy !!!! I don't buy the its all over the top so anything goes routine. If it smells like...and it looks like...well, you know the rest.

Avoid like the plague.

edit: Apparently other more close minded reviewers believe that since I disliked this movie, I am an "obvious hater" which I can only assume means I am phobic, which of course is not true. I decided to do this wacky, crazy thing and judge the movie based on the actual content of the film and not by its mere presence (i.e. its refreshing to see...)

Sure, it may be refreshing to see but that doesn't equate into a great movie, just give them some better material to work with and tighter direction. In fact, I applaud the effort. Frankly, I'd rather go listen to my Kitchens of Distinction catalogue than watch this again.

Spider-Man 2 (2004)

Superman 2 rehash

[3/10 · 30 June 2005]

I must be one of a very few detractors on this. Apparently a lot of people bought into this dreck, but not me. First of all, it's Superman 2 all over again. Give up his powers for a girl ? Been done. Dropping the girl from the top of a building...hmmm, now where have I seen that..oh yeah, Superman 1. The action sequences are really great but everything in between is just so bad. Raimi indulges himself way too much, the completely out of context and totally unnecessary Singin in the Rain sequence comes to mind.

I can't believe George Lucas gets a bad rap for stitled dialogue and stuff like this gets a free pass.

I also didn't think the Spiderman CGI looked very good. For starters, let's just throw out all the laws of physics. Secondly the lighting is terrible noticeable and detracted from any notion of realism.

The movie does have some things going for it. Alfred Molina was cast well as the villain; the soundtrack was great and the fight scenes were really well done.

24 Hour Party People (2002)

Manchester...So much to Answer For...

[8/10 · 30 March 2004]

The problem with a movie about the music that came out of Manchester, England is that if the movie is entirely about the music only, the appeal would be limited which belies the fact that Manchester is arguably one of the most important cities in terms of the bands and music that came out over the last 3 decades.

Unfortunately the movie needs a center about which it all can revolve and the Factory Records/Tony Wilson/Hacienda arc is the obvious choice. What is left out could fill another movie as we learn next to nothing about other important Manchester bands like, uh, The Smiths, not to mention The Stone Roses and one of the pioneers of electronic music: 808 State.

Despite their being the proto-typical Madchester band, The Happy Mondays really were not all that interesting, or as good as the above groups. Still, the movie is well done and encapsulates the music scene in England, particuraly during the latter part of the 80s, easily Manchester's hey-day.

Possibly difficult for Americans to grasp, yes, it is true that rave culture really began, in earnest, in this northern industrial British city as did the whole baggy (clothes) era.

For those who are still interested in this, seek out the collections of the all these bands. You won't be disappointed.

The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (2002)

Majestic film.

[10/10 · 20 December 2002]

Simply put: the best fantasy movie ever made.

The complete Lord of the Rings trilogy will be this generations Star Wars. We will be looking back upon Peter Jackson's triumph with the same awe and inspiration used to look at G. Lucas' accomplishments 20 years prior.

Once again Jackson and company find the right tone at every turn. It never becomes too hokey, too geeked out, too cloying, too anything. Scene after scene he manages to avoid the pitfalls plaguing so many other simliar movies.

Last thought: G. Lucas could have only dreamed of realizing a full CGI character as well as Gollum when first he attempted it with Episode 1.

For the first time, I believe we have seen just how incredibly far a filmmaker can go in inventing a character out of ones and zeros; quite scary indeed. Voice acting will definitely see a spike.

The Rookie (2002)

Home Run !

[9/10 · 8 November 2002]

Possible spoilers ahead, drive carefully.

Another in a long line of inspirational sports success stories, presented in broad strokes and succeeding on various levels. What sets The Rookie apart from other run-of-the-mill sports movies is Dennis Quaid's somewhat muted but appealing performance and the fact that the climax is not about winning the big game. So many other sports movies always result in the team making it to that big game and then its over, with Rudy being a notable exception and make no mistake, The Rookie does share a common theme with Rudy in that its about perseverance and not so much about winning the world series/super bowl/championship.

No one is really allowed to stretch themselves dramatically here, yet the payoff is still worth the ride. The director and screenwriter strike a fine balance by finding the right tone that befits Jim Morris' very personal and triumphant story.

I believe The Rookie will hold up over time and can be mentioned in the ranks of Hoosiers and Rudy as fine sports-inspired tales of making it.

Now that covers Football, Basketball and Baseball....I wonder how many screenwriters out there right now are working on a Hockey version ?

Spider-Man (2002)

a world wide web....of fun !

[8/10 · 16 May 2002]

Rather surprisingly, Spiderman has ushered in another generation of young movie-goers to summertime action like predecessors Batman (1989) and Superman (1978) previously did. Spiderman may share more in common with those movies than one would think. For nearly 10 years, all movie studios have been attempting to rekindle the summertime super-hero flame that was last seen in its full fury with 1989's Batman, but few have had the success that Spidey is apparently seeing.

And that is not to say its undeserved, but rather unexpected. Columbia has several things in their favor on this one, namely, a veteran director and more importantly, no super-sized egos on the marquee (G.Clooney anyone ?). Tobey Maguire seems like a natural to play P.Parker but what I found a little surprising was how fetching Kirsten Dunst was as the love interest and Willem Dafoe's believably evil turn as the nemesis.

All the pieces just seem to come together for this blockbuster (and for once, the name is appropriate), but unfortunately, if history is any indicator, this is as good as it will get: the sequels almost never hold up against the original so movie goers - enjoy it while you can !

Hannibal (2001)

Another One BITES the Dust !

[5/10 · 23 September 2001]

Minor spoilers.

Poor writing, and the sexual pretense of most of the major characters notwithstanding, Hannibal is a well crafted movie, obviously not for the faint of heart, however, its fatal flaw lies in its trueness to the source material. Unfortunately, when the master print is tainted, so to are all the copies from that master.

Moore is fine as Starling, yet Starling is a shell of the person she was in SOTL with very little of the vulnerable ambition she once displayed; Gary Oldman gets to do Zorg again, this time from a wheelchair; Tony Hopkins again is fine as the lead (Is he ever bad ?); Giancarlo fits nicely in his role; and the rest save for Liotta play well, its just the pastiche mode of storytelling wears thin after 120 mins and the shock/revelation of the ending does not validate the investment.

I'm not the first to make this observation, but I found it to be the most revealing - In Silence of the Lambs, Lecter was truly frightening because of the possibilty he might escape. He seemed ahead of everyone at every step of the way despite being totally restrained - that helped set the tension and mood. Now in Hannibal, he is out galavanting all over the place, one moment he is giving an art class in Florence, the next he is moving between shadows in D.C. even though he is on the FBI's most wanted list; well, the problem lies therein; its just not as scary now that he can move freely among us (and apparently with a sizable bank account to FEED on among other things) . Throughout SOTL we were waiting, wondering, anticipating if Dr. Lecter, who at once embodied pure evil and extreme politeness (a delicious combination), would lash out and terrify us whereas now he is doing it at every turn without impunity.

Unfortunately, Hannibal somewhat scars the entire series by appealing to those with an APPETITE for obscenity and yet you cannot entirely blame the filmmakers for all they did was transfer most admirably to celluloid what was on linen.

Election (1999)

Its unanimous ! Election is a winner !

[9/10 · 23 September 2001]

minor spoilers...

I have not seen a more hysterically funny satire than Election. The wry observations and sardonic look at people left me bent over in agony from so much laughing. It may be futile to summarize the sublime beauty of Election so permit me to just make some of my own observations on why it works so well:

Tracey Flick's persona is nailed by the filmmakers. The goody-two-shoes in high school always took everything way too seriously, and they recognize that. While everyone else realizes its just a student body election, she approaches it like it is a senate race. Case and point, the speech: student body presidents never make any real changes, does she really think there are lunch "issues" to be ironed out in some all-night meeting ? In her mind: probably yes. Its only a matter of time before she starts calling in her legal team and so when Mr. M tries to lecture her on the prudent course of action, she turns the tables and puts him in his place, refusing to go on without her lawyers present, for a student election no less!

Notice how the sex issue worms its way into Mr. M's life, Flick inserts a few odd statements like harmonious and productive into a seemingly casual conversation, and Mr. M does exactly what all trapped men would do in the situation: he goes straight for the porno stash in the basement. Hilarious. Also, notice how there is no mention of his salicious desires for Flick, yet while making love to his wife, her face suddenly appears on screen egging him onward and invigorating him. Wonderful !

Matthew Broderick's portrayal of Mr. M's downward spiral into the vortex of corruption is terrific, complete with a earnest hopefulness and ho-hum attitude, you never think he could possibly crack as he winds his way further and further into betrayal, reminiscent of William H. Macy's character in Fargo: we see the cracks, but the dam never really breaks. In fact he turns out ok, with his life seemingly in order, despite having to leave his past in shame.

In fact, I found all the characters in Election to be refreshingly upbeat and hopeful, an ironic twist that their daily lives are filled with a calm vengence. I think the filmmakers had that in mind, if you notice the movie is shot in winter, every shot looks clean and tidy like just after a rain; the streets, the school grounds, the houses, et. al. but of course its just clean and happy on the surface, while underneath, in the sewers, its a dirty rotten mess of humanity, but who needs to go there when you've got the American Family Inn on the interstate where adultery is as easy to obtain as the cheesy razor and toothpaste kit in the vending machine (a definite sign you've hit rock bottom). Each character even has their own pleasant resolution again reiterating the point about hopeful and earnest futures (a common theme in elections). You don't see too many movies with such a funny look at daily life yet Election is able to combine the mundane, the scandalous and the banal into an trenchant fable, again much like Fargo. I wouldn't go so far as to call it scathing because there is just too much pleasure and happiness in all this and there should be! If you can find such humor in the daily grind, you may have stumbled on a secret of living a happy life !

The Bad News Bears in Breaking Training (1977)

There's Bad....and then there is BAD !

[1/10 · 6 September 2001]

How can a movie like this be made ? How come this is not an afterschool special, because it sure looks and smells like one. This stinker is so bad...so incredibly bad.

Questions to ponder: Why does Kelly's Dad clap like a neanderthal ? Why is Kelly Leak so cool ? Why is there a celebration scene about getting hotel rooms (what is it with these Texas movies and celebrating otherwise normal things, see Urban Cowboy review). How are the Bears the California Champs if they lost in the title game last time ?

Things I love about this movie. William Devane mugging at the camera and showing off his baseball skills (in an Army jacket no less, notice he has one outfit almost the entire movie). Kelly "losing control" and just running...running...running from all his problems. And perhaps the best scene in the entire movie, when the team gets the hotel room with the view of the Astrodome, Harpo Marx Jr. runs into Kelly's room to tell him they can see the dome from another room, and Mr. Jackie Earle Haley in all his coolness gives him the biggest "I am way too cool to be bothered by your childish excitement" look. Now that is direction !

but all is not lost, Willy Devane does well considering the material he has to work with, and J.E.Haley actually went on to be in '83s Losin' It, a rather funny movie and role. And we get to see the wonderful Astrodome in all its 70s glory, although Jimmy Baio nearly tanks this one and surely makes his cousin look like Anthony Hopkins.

Box of Moonlight (1996)

Amusing diversion.

[7/10 · 23 August 2001]

Anyone whose ever been close to an engineer will appreciate John Turturro's splendid portrayal of Al Fountain. From the stiff walk, the upright posture, the technically accurate answers and precise annunciation to the timed phone calls, reserved emotion, you really get a sense that he lives in a different world than Bucky. And Sam Rockwell is just as clever and affecting as the free-spirited Kid.

Although there isn't too much to this movie in terms of production, it stands out as a subtle and ironic tale of opposites attracting. If you're married to or have an engineer close to you, sit them down and watch this movie, they soon will be laughing at themselves.

The Mexican (2001)

Ay Carumba !

[3/10 · 20 August 2001]

Pitt+Roberts+Mexico=no bueno.

Things get going rather well and good for the first act and then come to a screeching halt. The second and third act drag on at an excrutiatingly slow pace. Some may like the Mexico-mojo going on, but when you consider the star pairing of Julia Roberts and Brad Pitt and how uninspiring this movie turns out to be, you realize just how much of a let down it is. Said another way, they could have done a lot more with these two.

On the good side, the Soprano dad does a good job considering he is a wistful, gay hitman (silence=death, and so does my glock 9). Brad Pitt is always easy on the eyes, but am I the only one who maintains JR is the acting equivalent of ice skating shows ? I haven't seen that much forced emotion since Nancy Kerrigan triple lutzed in baby-blue chiffon....

Need evidence: check out the playful bed scene in Vegas, ugh, that cackle. Movie rule #343: Julia Roberts cackled = box office draw. Just see her last 3 romantic comedy trailers: each one contains a 2 sec. cackle (see Stepmom, Runaway Bride, et. al.)

In summary, the Mexican does nothing for me, at times, amusing, but mostly goes in too many different directions. And way too much violence that doesn't help the story whatsoever. Just tell me you didn't groan at least a little bit when Jerry discovers he doesn't have his passport and thus, must catapult this stinker past the two hour mark.

Let us all pray that Steve Soderberg can get some genuine quality out of these two later this year in Ocean's Eleven.

Bounce (2000)

The Cure for your Afflecktion.

[3/10 · 13 August 2001]

I'll admit Gwen Paltrow could make a hunting safety video interesting, but there are many problems with Bounce that cannot simply be ignored. Caution, spoilers ahead, drive carefully.

First of all, Affleck and Gwen have no chemistry on screen. Affleck has more chemistry with his 2 fingers of scotch. In fact, its nice to see stock footage of Ben exiting the rehab center worked into a major motion picture, but I digress. Charlie Sheen has been pitching that one around Hollywood for years without success.

Essentially, a formula story with a predictable ending and nothing you'll be too interested in. Affleck's character is not someone you root for. He's the take-no-prisoners-life-is-too-short-to-drink-cheap-vodka hot shot ad exec who "graciously" gives up his airplane ticket so he can bed some broad he has known for all of 5 minutes; how noble. He'd be better off with Sandy Bullock's character from 28 days, now there's a $500 Charles Nelson Riley match for you. Tell us what she's won Gene Rayburn...

Gwen is the life boat that prevents this sinking ship from going under mostly due to Ben's unlikable Buddy and a vapid script. Buddy shows up to "make amends" with Gwen and within 5 minutes starts making a play for her. What is that ? Is that a sub section of the ninth step in the AA codec: make amends with those you have made suffer, and if possible, try to get them into the sack ????

Consider it star training. Someday Ben will make the big blockbuster (Pearl Harbor notwithstanding) but it ain't this dog.

Jurassic Park III (2001)

It's Dino-mite !!!

[7/10 · 26 July 2001]

No spoilers. Why ? Because we love you....

Well, it may not be the next Star Wars but I was reminded of a certain early 80s adventure movie with Harry Ford. JP3 is a great summer thrill ride, with no real turn-offs both in acting and wrting. Joe Johnstone and the Dinos do a splendid job keeping the pace and keeping you interested, in fact, I'd say Sam Niel was better in 3 than he was in 1.

Maybe it was the fact that their is only one child in this movie, but he acts like an adult so there is no real this-is-a-kiddie-movie backlash.

There was also a lack of the hokey-ness that plagued the previous two movies, more so on #2 than on #1.

All in all, I'd say this was a very well done summer action flick, perfect for a little escapism. If I had any qualms about JP3, I'd say it was probably a little short, and others have agreed. You don't hear that said about many movies these days with the trend towards overblown affairs (Pearl Harbore). It could be construed as a compliment.

The ending of the movie definitely leaves it open for sequels just as the previous versions have done, and can you blame Universal ? They know a good money maker when they see it. With technology progressing the way it does so rapidly, by the time JP4 comes out, we'll all be able to render a T-Rex on our Dell powerbooks !

Road House (1989)

Artistic quality: 1, Camp value: 10

[3/10 · 6 July 2001]

Warning: possible spoilers ahead, drive carefully.

Well, if you've perused my Urban Cowboy review, then you know I love Road House. Of course its campy fun, its cheesier than a Wisconsin gift pack, but its got a lot going for it: namely Bar fights, philosophical bouncers, chicks who strip in bars, and ladies and gentleman...Sam Elliot.

For more fun, we also have a hot doctor who looks she stepped out of the Baywatch makeup trailer. A couple of observations on Ms. Lynch, why does she look like she is gonna vomit just before the first time she and Dalton kiss ? Is that her "I'm overtaken by your power" look ? Also, notice that crafty director trick of making her look nerdly in her "boring" hair and oversized glasses, so that later on when her beauty is revealed, its got soooo much more impact !

Dalton: no words. Just a man. Dalton. Who the heck thought to make this guy a doctor of philosophy but he likes to be the cooler because it gives him so much insight into the intelligent affairs of Brad Wesley's henchman. What was his dissertation on: Observations on the id, the ego and drunk carnies.

Obi-wan Kenob....I mean Sam Elliot shows up as the all knowing bouncer (boy if you've seen one....).

some other Road House observations, how can the Road House owner, you know, that dude from Emergency, have a nice office in that filthy bar ? How can that overly obese Brad Wesley lackey even throw a punch ? If "pain don't hurt" then why was Dalton wincing so badly after being shot ? If I was Dr. Lynch I would ask him "why are so acting like such a wimp...I thought pain dont hurt." How come Brad Wesley fights Dalton mono-a-mono ? Let's see, you've knocked out all my best men, hmmm, I think I can take you.

Still its a knock out of a campy movie, even though it doesnt have a mechanical bull.

The Insider (1999)

Smokin' !

[10/10 · 2 July 2001]

The Insider: You have a director at the top of his form. Excellent writing. Three completely awesome and believeable actors. A sublime soundtrack.

It's just such a shame there aren't more of these: serious adult dramas.

What next from Michael Mann ? He seems to be batting 1000 in my book. We'll see how he tackles a complex subject like Ali later this year, but fortunately for us, he has given what may be the best movie of the 90s.

I do not know how R.Crowe does it, but somehow he captured the essence of an otherwise normal, scientific everyman put into a pressure cooker and forced to squirm out from underneath it. The scene in the hotel room, when he and Al Pacino first meet: this is such a wonderful scene. Full of subtle clues and clever and affecting writing/direction and acting. Watch how Lowell (Pacino) who knows nothing about Jeffrey (Crowe) and what he has to say measures him and equally impressive is Jeffrey's nervous assertion of Lowell.

At one point later in the film, Jeffery remarks he cannot find the parameters to effectively make a decision. Spoken like a true man of science. His crumbling under the weight of his life is entirely palpable as is Lowell steadfast resolve to stick to his guns, despite being under his own legal and professional stress.

I could go on and on but I won't except to say that I hope Michael Mann and his team continue to create excellent dramatic stories that require us, the viewer, to use our brains and watch the movie with patience and attention.

The Patriot (2000)

The Birth of ... mediocrity.

[5/10 · 29 June 2001]

Warning : possible spoilers ahead ! drive carefully.

Like an Endive Salad of Patriot Greens (make that Red, White and Blues), this movie is a toss up. On one hand you have Mel. C'mon, Mel could make an safety video good. You have J.Will on the pipes. You've got some great period production (ships in Charlestown, redcoats, etc.). Did I mention Mel ? On the other hand, you have Ute and Roland Emmerich. The same duo that brought you ID4. Great effects. Stupid movie. (how can we fit Randy Cousin Eddie Quaid into the climax...hmmm).

The problems with this movie are the unnecessary gory violence. Some it was really not needed, let's face it. You have Cornwallis who seems to be fairly smart but you've got his sidekick Tavington who seems like a bad guy plucked out of a 1940s crime drama. Shallow writing indeed. Case and point: the black soldier who wants his freedom and the lame ass militia man who mocks him with the obligatory "gee, I came to my senses, it's my honor to fight with you" epiphany. That should have either been cut out or developed much better. I also have issues with Heath Bar's love interest who seems to only know how to stand and smile like a goober. Look at me-I'm cute, I'm the next Calista ! Watch me pout ! pssst...act ! How can a movie be made where in one scene they show a young man being sewn up in a bag to spend the night (historically accurate) and the next scene they're sucking face like a couple of horny teens in public (historically very unaccurate). It is possible to make historically accurate movies that are interesting.

Just listen to Roland's comments on the making of this movie (on DVD) and you'll get a sense for how out of it he is. He knows how to direct major action sequences but is this the guy you want telling the story of how this country was created ?

Lastly, I will say The Patriot has its merits, but ultimately it plays out like a ... like a... another edition of Thunderdome !!! Two countries enter, one country leaves. This is the type of movie Affleck should be getting the lead on, not as the next Jack Ryan !

Cast Away (2000)

Strong first and second acts, worth contemplating.

[7/10 · 25 June 2001]

Cast Away had strong first and second acts. Well, the middle part was most of the movie but Tom Hanks again does a fine job and it leaves you contemplating and thinking about your own chances in that situation. Of course, you'll never want to get on a plane again.

But the third act, is weak. I will not reveal what happens except to say that Zemeckis doesnt quite achieve the same impact that hangs with you during the middle part. Some bad writing and cheesy acting (angel wings girl...ugh !) but all in all, the quality is pretty good. Worth seeing.

Manhunter (1986)

Silence of the Miami Heat

[6/10 · 6 February 2001]

Looking back now at this 1986 release, it breaks down like a cocktail. one part Miami Vice (bad 80s hairstyles, lots of hot pink and cool blues), one part Silence of the Lambs (there are elements that carry over in Harris' sequel, most notably, the FBI investigator employing the help of Hannibal Lecter to catch another seriel killer) and one part Heat (Michael Mann was obviously honing his masterful skill with this movie, but it does not come to fruition until 1995's magnificent Heat; the helicopter night shots, a frozen cold house on the beach, etc.)

Maybe its just me but I felt the lead character, FBI dude, was weak. He just didnt get my attention, seemed kind of out of sorts in certain shots, I cant put my finger on it but overall the acting and writing seemed weak. Taken in its context it was probably a much more satisfying movie for 1986, I can't think of another movie like it that came before. But it's been done a few times since, and much better. The fact that there have been movies to utilize elements of Manhunter must mean this is a great film.

28 Days (2000)

Turned it off after 28 minutes.

[3/10 · 5 February 2001]

Its probably not right for me to judge a movie I turned off after a half an hour but something this bad couldn't have been saved by the last 60 minutes and it was so painfully obvious where it was headed.

There was no way I was going to care about Sandy's character. What, is she some tough-talking-take-no-prisoners-life-is-too-short-to-drink-cheap-vodka-jaded-city-slicker ? Ugh ! Who cares. It seemed at times the movie was satirical, giving us Sandy's chararacter (I forget her name, let's just call her Boozehound) - anyway, Boozehound's perspective. Who needs that !? I dont need to see a rehab center from this wastoid's pov.

Not funny. Not revealing. Trying so hard for redemption. And so horribly predictable. Go see Girl, Interrupted instead.

Dr. T & the Women (2000)

Altman gives birth to utter trash, and films it !

[1/10 · 31 January 2001]

Here are my soundbites:

Completely Boring !

Like having your gums scraped !

Watching $15 slowly burn would be more worthwhile !

I should have given my popcorn and movie money to the homeless person outside the theater and went home !

And for those of you who have seen it (my apologies):

The last scene of this movie is how I felt when I walked out of it.

Vegas Vacation (1997)

Take a vacation...from laughter !

[2/10 · 2 January 2001]

Pure Drivel. This is an utter waste of an otherwise, potentially profitable series. Where are the Nat'l Lampoons writers when you need them ?!!

I've seen better directing in Cat Chow commercials ! Chevy Chase just doesnt go anywhere in this movie. Everyone is standing around waiting for each other to be funny. Wallace Shawn is annoyingly unfunny as the dealer, Wayne Newton goes to bat for Sin City, and what is with that oversized jock strap worn by Siegfried on Roids ?

I'd rather watch Cousin Eddie follies for two hours than have to sit through this blatant promotional video for Vegas. But if there's one thing that has huge comedy potential its....Hoover Dam ! Severely Lame idea that goes nowhere (but come see us in the winter when the weather is nice...)

You want to see a funny movie about Vegas. See Showgirls. That's funny. Funny, as in, how bad can another Vegas movie be ??