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JayAuritt
Reviews
A Safe Place (1971)
One of the worst motion pictures ever made
The title of my review is no exaggeration. The only saving grace to watching this movie is that it's only about an hour and a half in length, even though it seems at least twice that long to view. The screenplay (assuming there really was a screenplay to begin with, because the dialogue feels totally improvised...not because it sounds "real", but because it's strained and ludicrous) is annoying to the nth degree, unless you like hearing profound voice-over comments such as "I love you from New York to Rome..from Rome to Madrid, etc. etc. etc. over and over and over again. If I was on a deserted island with a DVD player and this was the only DVD I had with me, I'd break it in a hundred pieces with a coconut because, otherwise, I'd end up searching for a shark to eat me as soon as possible. If I had a choice between being water-boarded and being forced to watch this movie repeatedly, I'd have a VERY tough decision to make. But, other than that, the movie was great.
All the Real Girls (2003)
A Real Drag
The photography looks nice, and Zooey Deschannel does a nice job, but that's about all there is to recommend this movie. Some of the most insipid and senseless dialog I've heard, (obviously mostly, if not completely, improvisational in nature), characters that are there for no apparent reason other than to annoy, scenes that seem pointless...well, you get the picture. (I wish I hadn't).
I assume that this film is supposed to feel like a "slice of life", but I'll take well-written dialog from Tarantino or Mamet that SOUNDS real over the garbage coming out of the mouths of most of the so-called characters in this thing any day of the week.
All the Real Girls is a Real Disappointment