Keegen Reviews

She's the One (1996)

This film is the one!

[24 January 1999]

Such a film with a great script and great acting is a rarity these days. But She's The One has it all. It is funny, it is clever, it is acted to great strength to make it the great movie it is.

Edward Burns is the man at the center he has just gotten married without his brother being there, and his new wife is adjusting to the family. Cameron Diaz plays the funny former girlfriend of Burns who is now seeing his brother for the occasional get together.

While all this is going on, there are plenty of laughs and moments of truth to be seen. I can understand how people were bored or fell asleep during this movie.....I mean if I had the brain of a pea I would have too. But only the smart will get this very funny, very subtle, very very likeable film.

I'd give this great film ****1/2 out of ***** (that's a 4 and 1/2 out of 5....for all those people who didn't understand She's The One)

Can't Hardly Wait (1998)

There are so many lines I can use to put down dreadful movie but I think that the name speaks for itself!

[21 January 1999]

There are some films where you wish....no let me rephrase that....demand that time that the film makers stole from your life....this film is one of them. I hated everything about this film, from its title Can't Hardly Wait (bad english) to its end credits, which were the only good thing about the movie.

There are millions of people who love this idiotic film filled with stupid cheap and immature laughs......and I hate to think that those millions of people are the ones taking over the country one day.

Which leads me to my next statement.......if ever a person wrote that all people under 21 should see Can't Hardly Wait......this person should be put on trial for trying to make the world "dumb"....

This movie is the kind of film everyone who watches Dawson's Creek like because its stupid, it has no moral, no story, no sense of humor, no right to be screened even to the dumbest people....

This film would be ideal for torture, ten seconds of this and the prisoner would be in agony! They would be spilling their guts about everything....

The acting is woeful, the humor is missing, the director is wanted for making a terrible film, the writers were babies, and the fans are simple minded.

Can't Hardly Wait is on the screen for about 90 minutes, and that's 90 minutes too long!

Grosse Pointe Blank (1997)

NEWSFLASH! ! ! Comedy Hits Pointe Blank Target!!!!

[21 January 1999]

This film is so great in so many ways. The subtle humor. The funny violence. The dozens of great one liners. This film is for everyone for hated Empire Records! ! ! Because unlike Empire Records, Grosse Point Blanke is witty, has a talented cast, a great story, and most of all it is howlingly funny!

All the people who have condemned this film are the ones who love stupid films like Empire Records, Billy Madison, Happy Gilmore...and who think a fart joke is classic comedy material...these people who I am describing are the dim wits who can't find the subtle humor in Grosse Point Blanke because they are simply STUPID!

John Cusack is in top form playing the kind hearted hit man, this could be the best role of his career (I'll wait for Thin Red Line before deciding)...he fits this role like a glove and his delivery is simply superb......he is an excellent comedy actor. He was backed up so greatly by Minnie Driver, who is destined for huge things after this, Good Will Hunting and Circle of Friends. She is so funny. She is the new Gwyneth Paltrow (meaning she is english and impersonates an American accent to perfection. Gwyn is the other way around)

The rest of the supporting cast were superb, with Dan Akroyd in top form, and Alan Arkin delivering a fine if a little unseen performance...and then there's Joan Cusack who steals every scene she's in......simply because she has talent and knows what comedy is.......

Over all Grosse Point Blanke is fresh, fast paced, fun, and different......for all those dim witted people who loved Empire Records stay away from a great movie like this....

Empire Records (1995)

Empire Of Duds!!!

[21 January 1999]

There are some films where you wish....no let me rephrase that....demand that time that the film makers stole from your life....this film is one of them. I hated everything about this film, from its title Empire Records (how pretentious is that title?) to its end credits, which were the only good thing about the movie.

There are millions of people who love this idiotic film filled with stupid cheap and immature laughs......and I hate to think that those millions of people are the ones taking over the country one day.

Which leads me to my next statement.......a person wrote that all people under 21 should see Empire Records......this person should be put on trial for trying to make the world "dumb"....

This movie is the kind of film everyone who watches Dawson's Creek like because its stupid, it has no moral, no story, no sense of humor, no right to be screened even to the dumbest people....

This film would be ideal for torture, ten seconds of this and the prisoner would be in agony! They would be spilling their guts about everything....

The acting is woeful, the humor is missing, the director is wanted for making a terrible film, the writers were babies, and the fans are simple minded.

Empire Records is on the screen for about 90 minutes, and that's 90 minutes too long!

Gattaca (1997)

A Thinking person's tale

[6 January 1999]

Gattaca is one of the most original and amazing films I have ever seen. Writer/Director Andrew Niccol's ideas in this film are truly remarkable. The style and tone of the film is similar to Contact, but surpasses that film because of the originality and brilliant execution of the idea. The film takes a while to get into, but by the end you are hooked on this miraculous movie.

There are a few elements that don't quite work, however, such as the murder investigation, but the events that this sub plot lead to make it worthwhile in the end. The ending is extremely moving and touching and the production design is amazing. The score, by Michael Nyman, is also brilliant in perfectly capturing the mood of this unique (and sadly underrated) film.

Point Break (1991)

An under-rated classic

[6 January 1999]

Point Break is one of those films that everybody loves, but that nobody actually talks about all that often. It is a film that if you mention it in conversation, everyone else around is bound to say how much they enjoyed it.

The film's two main assets are unexpected ones, in the form of the direction and the script. The direction by Kathryn Bigelow is nothing short of excellent. Her handling of the action and suspense scenes is exciting and riveting. The two sky-diving scenes are brilliant as is the foot chase through the streets (and houses) of the city. The script, by W. Peter Illif, is also very good and the best thing about the film. The plot is multi-layered and has an original relationship between the hero and the villain. The way the story resolves itself and the ultimate resolutions is excellent, by the standards of most Hollywood action films.

This film deserves to be remembered as one of the better actioners of the nineties, not up there with Die Hard 2/3 or Speed, but better than 90% of the action junk made nowadays. At least this film has a plot.

Wrongfully Accused (1998)

Wrongfully Conceived

[4 January 1999]

One of the most awful, mind numbing spoofs ever made, Wrongfully Accused has about two chuckles in 90 minutes. These types of films are either really great (Airplane, The Naked Gun) or absolutely dreadful (Spy Hard, Fatal Instinct, Dracula: Dead And Loving It, The Silence Of The Hams etc.) and this falls into the later category. There is nothing wrong with the subject matter chosen for spoofing, but the poor jokes and performances sink this film. Leslie Nielsen is still a very talented performer when given the right material, but in this film he stinks. I hope Nielsen chooses his roles carefully in the future, as his track record over the past few years has been woeful. If he must continue making spoofs, then the only one he should consider is Naked Gun 444 1/4, which would probably be half decent.

Die Hard (1988)

The greatest action film ever!

[12 October 1998]

The action film that all others have to try and beat, Die Hard is easily the greatest actioner ever made. The film is perfectly constructed, and the performances for an action film are much better than usual. Alan Rickman is the greatest villain for one of these films, he is memorable without being over the top and also quite believable. I have seen this film at least 30 times and I never grow tired of it. Forget Face/Off and Speed, Die Hard is the ultimate action film, which in my opinion will never be topped.

I Know What You Did Last Summer (1997)

Sub Standard Slasher

[10 October 1998]

The best thing about I Know What You Did Last Summer is its title. Nothing else really stands out as being exceptional. This film is competent in all departments, but will not be remembered for anything in particular. The acting is OK, but nothing really memorable like in the two Scream movies, and the script (by Scream writer Kevin Williamson) succumbs to all the tired cliches that he mocked so well in Scream. The film is full of those tired horror cliches that were old back in the early 80's, where Horror was at its peak. This film is not really scary at all, and has to rely on phony jump scenes instead of generating a sense of real terror and menace. The film is also quite ludricous in many scenes. Check out the scene where Sarah Michelle Gellar is running from the killer to her family's store. She is running, while the killer is walking, yet he seems to get closer with every step. The most amazing thing about this film is that there is not one character you feel sympathy for during the entire film, which must be a first. The biggest Horror cliche of them all is tacked on at the end for the invevitable series of sequels, spinning out endlessly. The sad thing is, even though I really didn't like this film that much, I still want to see the sequel.

Private Parts (1997)

All Funny Parts

[10 October 1998]

Private Parts is unlike most films: it makes you laugh. I loved Private Parts, because it showed that Howard Stern was human. The idea to have Howard Stern playing himself was ingenious and the scenes which involved him in the past were excellent, they were simply funny. Most people were put off by this film, I don't know how they could. Stern is likeable, and funny. The story is great, it is original. It shows that Stern isn't a jerk. That he is nice. I was on the floor the whole way through this film, and I'm sure there are a lot of people who were the same. Top marks for a top film.

Freeway (1996)

Dreadful!

[10 October 1998]

There is only one word that describes this film: Dreadful. I don't see the point of making this terrible movie, it was meaningless. The story was nothing, it had no substance. It started off bad which meant it could only get better. It didn't. It chose to take the hard way out and took us on an ugly ride. The main character is totally unlikeable. I hated here from the start, she is annoying and bitchy. And when Sutherland came into the scene, it just made things worse. His character was the most awful character ever, even though he was suppose to be mean. He was dreadful. The performance of Sutherland was a heartache. He just proved to me that he isn't worth watching. Reese on the same hand was horrible. What made her sink so low to do this film. I hated this film the only good thing about it was the music by the excellent Danny Elfman.

Chasing Amy (1997)

Two's company, three's a crowd!

[10/10 · 2 October 1998]

What isn't there about Chasing Amy that anyone couldn't like? It is filled with great characters, who seemed real (more real than some people I know). The main character, Holden McNeil, is the person who holds the film together with his problem. Banky is the trusty companion who watches Holden's back. Then there is Alyssa, who seems to break Banky's world apart. They say that two's company, three's a crowd. This is what the film is based on.

The great thing about Chasing Amy, apart from the brilliant acting, is the great humor. And it manages to hold both a comedy genre as well as a drama. There are some superb lines in this movie, delivered from the whole cast. The drama scenes are done to perfection. The scene outside the hockey arena is a standout! Even though the whole film is filled with excellent scenes. The camera work is the only let down of the movie but in no way does it affect the feel of the movie in fact it adds to the realism of the situation. Kevin Smith sure does deliver with this top film, it passes Clerks to be the best of the trilogy. All I can say is that this is one film not to be missed!!!

Mercury Rising (1998)

Willis' number of dud films the only thing Rising

[10 August 1998]

Mercury Rising is a fairly competent, but terribly unbelievable story about a nine year old boy who cracks a secret government code and then is targeted for termination. The way in which the boy is shown breaking the code is a scene too ridiculous to describe, and also, the significance of the code is never really established. We never know what is at stake for Kudrow (Alec Baldwin) and why he wants to protect it so much. This brings Art Jeffries (Bruce Willis) onto the scene. Bruce takes it upon himself to protect the boy Simon (Miko Hughes) and kill any number of bad guys along the way. While the premise to this thriller is interesting enough, it hasn't quite been developed to its full potential. Sure, we have a lot of scenes with Bruce running around and doing his macho "John McClane" act again, but it's all starting to get a bit tiring now. Bruce should try and extend himself into bigger and better roles and stop wasting his time on second rate thrillers such as this. As for Baldwin, he is possibly given the worst part ever to a big star, given about three scenes (only one with Willis, not counting the unforgivably contrived end fight sequence) in which to do his smooth villain routine. As it is, he isn't too bad, but you wish the director, Harold Becker had given him more screen time and made it more of a personal one on one battle, rather than another Bruce Willis against the world film. The most impressive performance in the film goes to Miko Hughes, who is really believable and makes you really care about the fate of his character. All in all, a good view if you don't like thrillers being too taxing, but certainly not up there with Willis' or Baldwin's best. ** stars out of *****.

The Shawshank Redemption (1994)

The greatest movie ever!

[10 August 1998]

The Shawshank Redemption is easily my favorite movie of all time. It has every single element that should be looked for in a film. A brilliant script (with the best dialogue ever written), a perfect cast (not one bad performance), and not to mention an original, complex and ultimately uplifting story.

Based on the Stephen King novel, Shawshank Redemption is a delight from first scene to last. The opening is a brilliantly done sequence with Andy's (Tim Robbins) trial intercut with his actions on the night of his crime. This leads to him being taken to Shawshank with one of the best shots ever captured on film, with the camera sweeping from behind the prison bus in the air and diving into the middle of the prison yard. There Andy meets Red (Morgan Freeman) and others, and a gradual friendship begins to develop.

This movie has that certain indefinable screen magic, every line of dialogue spoken has real conviction and meaning, and the performances in this movie are nothing short of magnificent. Tim Robbins delivers his best screen performance ever, as the quietly spoken Andy. Here is a character like no other, so vivid, so real, that you can't help but like him. Morgan Freeman also delivers his best work ever as Red, Andy's friend. Freeman, while playing a different character from Robbins, is also able to give off a quiet dignity for his character.

The supporting cast is perfect. From Bob Gunton, chillingly evil, but never over the top as to become cartoonish, as the Warden. Clancy Brown, as the prison Guard Hadley is brilliant, as is Veteran James Whitmore, as Brooks, who while given relatively small screen time is brilliant as the lifer con who's sad journey the film details.

There is not a dull moment or poor line of dialogue in this film. Credit first time director Frank Darabont for this remarkable piece of work. He is a director of the future. I still can't believe this was his first movie!, he will find it hard to top this masterful film. Special mention must be made of the music score by Thomas Newman, who has composed a simple, but perfect score for this film. His scoring of the scene with Andy and Red sitting up against the wall discussing their plans for release is nothing short of brilliant, as is the rest of his score.

I encourage everyone who has not seen this to grab it now, as it is surely not only the best movie of the 90's but the best movie of all time.

***** out of *****

The X Files (1998)

Brilliant Sci-Fi Story

[6 August 1998]

The X Files is certainly a more than worthy successor to the ever popular TV series. This film has loads of action, good performances all round and, most importantly, a well worked out story that twists and turns quite nicely. The films plot was extremely well worked out and was full of interesting ideas and twists. The three opening scenes of the film are superb, as tension builds from one to the next and then the story kicks into high gear. Overall, an excellent adaption of the TV series onto the big screen, and I predict a long and profitable future for the X Files movies.