If These Porches Could Talk (2019) Poster

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6/10
A silly parade of Southern small town caricatures
punisherversion126 March 2020
If These Porches Could Talk Written and directed by Travis Mills

Now I have to say this and get it out of the way right out of the gate, I have not seen the original. This is a sequel. Does this mean I'm going to be confused about what is taking place? No not at all. This features the original characters(some played by different actors) but it is a different self contained story. It can be enjoyed without watching the original.

The other thing that I have to mention is getting into the tone of this film right from the get go. This is an over the top comedic silly film. It was clearly designed that way. It was designed to play on character archetypes and really amp up the wild bug eyed comic intensity. If you understand that, you might be able to go along for the ride. Of course this means watching more than 5 minutes.

The porch ladies are off to clear the name of Patsy Lynn(Marlene Cupit) and her husband. There have been serious murders and attempted murders targeting theater owners particularly in small town Mississippi. That is one of the things I have to praise this movie on. The small town feel is just superb. I feel the sense of community. I feel and understand the culture of everyone knowing each other and how that level of intimacy can breed potential contempt especially in times of crisis. I also liked when the movie brought in elements of the supernatural and the local legends. It sprinkles in verisimilitude and character to the town and the people.

With that said it is very over the top. I know I said that before but I need to emphasize that again. The facial expressions are exaggerated. The comedy is building on spooks and southern customs. I didn't find much of it funny though. Heightened expressions and responses to situations usually only work in actual animation. I saw what they were trying for but it was landing with a bit of a thud.

I did like the performances from Sadie Hebert. I worked with her on a movie that didn't finish. I thought she had chops then. She does her best to work as this character. She carries this movie as she is the driving force behind solving the case. Holly Bonney also embodies the put upon wife pretty well. She carries it in her eyes. The stress of her husband being laid up in a hospital not knowing what might happen and the loyalty to her friends has her torn. She doesn't know whom to believe. She wants everything to go back to normal. You can tell she wants that more than anything. Marlene Cupit embodies what you think the matriarch of a big Southern family is like. She is full of life and boisterous. She carries the comedy well. She is definitely one of the standouts as well.

I'm not a fan of Travis Mills as a director. I despised Blood Country and only hated Cornbread Cosa Nostra but this one was pretty alright. This is certainly my favorite of his. I could understand where the story was going so that's a perk. I would recommend seeing it. It is available to stream on Amazon Prime. They don't make many movies like this. I give this one a C.
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2/10
Just beyond horrible
barbdelorme24 June 2021
Couldn't even finish watching the first 15 minutes! Horrible "acting"! OMG! Blech!!
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