The Bullwinkle Show (TV Series)

Pottsylvania Creeper: Parts 3-4 (1962)

Bill Scott: Bullwinkle J. Moose, Fearless Leader, Magic Mirror, Big Dwarf, Mr. Peabody, Orville Wright, Eph, Old Citizen, Additional Voices

Quotes 

• J. Edgar Bloomer : You're the fellas with the oddball flower?

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Yeah. Who you?

  J. Edgar Bloomer : I'm from the FPI.

  Rocket J. Squirrel : The FBI?

  J. Edgar Bloomer : No, FPI. Federal Plant Inspector.

• J. Edgar Bloomer : Boys, this is the only living example in this country of the Pottsylvania Creeper.

  Rocket J. Squirrel , Bullwinkle J. Moose : Pottsylvania Creeper?

  J. Edgar Bloomer : [gives Rocky a book]  Look here.

  Rocket J. Squirrel : Hokey smoke. It says here that the Pottsylvania Creeper is a vicious man-eating plant.

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Aw, now that's ridiculous. Isn't it, Mr. Bloomer?

  [notices Mr. Bloomer is missing] 

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Mr. Bloomer?

  Rocket J. Squirrel : Where'd he go?

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Hey, Rock.

  Rocket J. Squirrel : Huh?

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : The flower. It's smiling again.

• [Rocky and Bullwinkle are fleeing from the Pottsylvania Creeper] 

  Rocket J. Squirrel : Now wait just a second, Bullwinkle.

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Okay, Rock.

  [Rocky and Bullwinkle stop running] 

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : That's long enough! Come on!

  [Bullwinkle runs off] 

  Rocket J. Squirrel : But, Bullwinkle, we owe something to our town, our own community. We owe something to this country of ours.

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : [comes back]  Rock, this is no time to worry about taxes.

  Rocket J. Squirrel : No, Bullwinkle. I'm gonna go back and face that thing, whatever it is.

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : But why?

  Rocket J. Squirrel : I'm a TV type hero, is why.

• Boris Badenov : Well, that does it, Natasha.

  Natasha Fatale : Squirrel is kapoot?

  Boris Badenov : When that creeper grabs them, they stays grabbed. This will show Fearless Leader who's smarter, him or me.

  [Fearless Leader appears] 

  Fearless Leader : Well, which is, Badenov?

  Boris Badenov : [intimidated]  Him! Him! You! You!

  Narrator : Fearless Leader here? But I thought we had laws against that kind of thing.

  Fearless Leader : You fool. Laws only keep out honest people.

  Narrator : What... What do you mean?

  Fearless Leader : If you're a crook, you sneak in anyway.

  Narrator : But... But...

  Fearless Leader : Don't miss our next controversial episode "Vacation Daze" or "Visit To A Small Panic."

• Narrator : Sure enough, the enormous blossom had gone completely around the house and was sneaking up from behind on our little furry hero. There was nothing to do but run for it.

  Rocket J. Squirrel : Run for it!

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : I already heard the man!

• [Bullwinkle tries to save Rocky from the Pottsylvania Creeper] 

  Rocket J. Squirrel : Let me go, you creep!

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : I'm just trying to help.

  Rocket J. Squirrel : Not you, Bullwinkle, the other creep.

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Oh.

• Bullwinkle J. Moose : [after saving Rocky]  Got to get up pretty early in the morning to outwit Bullwinkle J. Moose.

  [the Pottsylvania Creeper knocks Bullwinkle down] 

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Boy, that thing must get up at sunrise.

• Fearless Leader : [when Rocky is captured by the Pottsylvania Creeper]  Well, we can close the book on that one, Badenov. The Creeper never fails.

  Boris Badenov : Oh, this is awful! Terrible!

  Fearless Leader : You mean about what's happening to the squirrel?

  Boris Badenov : No, about I didn't bring my camera.

• Boris Badenov : [when the Pottsylvania Creeper forms a tower with its leaves and stem]  Oh, boy! Now comes the best part, Fearless Leader. What a sight it will be!

  Fearless Leader : Yes. Turn your back, Badenov.

  Boris Badenov : Eh... Turn my back? I won't be able to see it happened.

  Fearless Leader : I know. There's only one thing better than looking at something wonderful.

  Boris Badenov : And that is?

  Fearless Leader : Keeping somebody else from seeing it.

  Boris Badenov : Oh, boy.

  [Boris turns around] 

  Fearless Leader : [looks through his binoculars]  Ooh! How perfectly schrecklich! Ooh! You ought to see this, Badenov!

  Boris Badenov : Yeah.

• Eph : What's the matter with you fellers? Haven't you ever had trouble with weeds before?

  Eph's Friend : Whatcha gonna do, Eph?

  Eph : I'm gonna give this thing a shot in the head with some triple strength weed killer, is what.

  [the crowd cheers] 

  Eph's Friend : Go to it, Eph!

  [notices Eph is missing] 

  Eph's Friend : Eph? Where'd he go?

  [a Pottsylvania Creeper is seen next to a bottle of weed killer] 

  Old Citizen : Look at that Creeper. I think that answers your question.

  Eph's Friend : It's... It's smiling!

  Old Citizen : Sort of a well-fed smile, too.

  Eph's Friend : I'm getting outta here!

  Old Citizen : Likewise!

  Mayor : Now, now. You mustn't panic. Remain calm. Stay where you are!

  Eph's Friend : How long, Mr. Mayor?

  Mayor : Just 'til I get a running start!

  [runs away]