The Bullwinkle Show (TV Series)

Wossamotta U: Parts 9-10 (1963)

Bill Scott: Bullwinkle J. Moose, Fearless Leader, Mangler #1, Referee, 'Gertrude', Bully, Recruiting Officer, Medical Officer, Doctor, Grampa Moose, Dudley Do-Right, Homer, Manny, Rufe, Additional Voices

Quotes 

• Narrator : Yes, Boris had switched diagrams and the hapless moose was now going over a set of battle plans of the Civil War!

  Colonel Jefferson Beauregard Lee : [interrupting]  Or, as we call it, the War Between the States.

  Narrator : Now wait a minute, who are you?

  Colonel Jefferson Beauregard Lee : Colonel Jefferson Beauregard Lee, sir.

  Rocket J. Squirrel : Yeah, but you're not part of our story.

  Colonel Jefferson Beauregard Lee : No, I'm from the League of Confederate Correctors.

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : The League of Confederate Correctors?

  Colonel Jefferson Beauregard Lee : Every time a program refers to the late unpleasantness as the "Civil War"...

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : ...You show up and correct them?

  Colonel Jefferson Beauregard Lee : That's right, shug. We call it the "War Between the States".

  Rocket J. Squirrel : Yeah, but...

  Colonel Jefferson Beauregard Lee : I just can't abide the word "civil"!

• Bullwinkle J. Moose , Rocket J. Squirrel : Touchdown?

  Mangler #2 : Any objections, wise guy?

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Miss, I'll thank you to keep a civil tongue in your head!

  Colonel Jefferson Beauregard Lee : [interrupting]  Uh-uh-uh: a "War Between the States" tongue.

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Oh, boy.

• 'Sybil' : [holding up a bomb]  Are youse ready, Gertrude?

  'Gertrude' : Let's have it, Sybil!

  Colonel Jefferson Beauregard Lee : [interrupting]  Uh-uh: "War Between the - "

  'Gertrude' : I said "Sybil", not "civil"!

  Colonel Jefferson Beauregard Lee : Sorry, ma'am.

• Rocket J. Squirrel : At this rate we'll never win!

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : We'll be lucky to lose!

• [the Wossamotta U football team emerges for the second half dressed as Confederate soldiers] 

  Spectator : Look at them fellas, Rufe. They gon' fight the war all over again.

  Rufe : Shucks, we southerners been doin' that for years.

• Narrator : And Bullwinkle turned and began dashing toward his own goal line! On he went, swivel-hipping his way through the opposition!

  Colonel Jefferson Beauregard Lee : Dagnabbit, you said "civil"!

  [the colonel raises a pistol, aimed directly at the camera, and fires a shot] 

  Narrator : [frustrated]  All right! "War Between the States"-hipping his way through the opposition! What can save the game for our boys?

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Maybe we could get some new writers.

• [the referee is being threatened by the Manglers, thus putting them ahead of Wossamotta U] 

  Rocket J. Squirrel : Don't you have any courage?

  Referee : Yes, but I've also got a wife and kiddies.

• Narrator : When our heroes finally made it under fire to their dressing room, gloom was written on every face.

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Except mine. I got "Despair" written on mine.

• Rocket J. Squirrel : If only they hadn't stolen our football plays.

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Well, they left these in their place.

  Rocket J. Squirrel : Bullwinkle, those aren't football plays. Those are battle plans for the Civil War.

  Colonel Jefferson Beauregard Lee : Uh-uh-uh. War between the states, you mean.

  Rocket J. Squirrel : Colonel Beauregard, you here?

  Colonel Jefferson Beauregard Lee : Us members of the League of Confederate Correctors is everywhere.

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : I've noticed.

• Rocket J. Squirrel : [holds up a wig]  Bullwinkle, look at this!

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Good heavens, Rock! You've scalped the scat back!

  Rocket J. Squirrel : Scalped, nothing! This is a wig! Bullwinkle, they aren't girls at all!

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : Oh, darn!

  Rocket J. Squirrel : What's the matter?

  Bullwinkle J. Moose : I was gonna ask the halfback to the prom tonight.