Sonic the Hedgehog (2020)
Jim Carrey: Dr. Robotnik
Photos
Quotes
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Agent Stone : I just thought you might like a latte with steamed Austrian goat milk?
Dr. Robotnik : What do I look like, an imbecile? Of course I want a latte. I LOVE THE WAY YOU MAKE THEM!
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Dr. Robotnik : I was spitting out formulas while you were spitting up formula.
Tom : I was breastfed, actually.
Dr. Robotnik : Nice. Rub that in my orphan face, why don't ya?
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Dr. Robotnik : Are you in charge here?
Major Bennington : Yes I a...
Dr. Robotnik : Nope!
Major Bennington : My...
Dr. Robotnik : Wrong!
Major Bennington : Na...
Dr. Robotnik : I'M IN CHARGE!
Major Bennington : Is Major...
Dr. Robotnik : ME!
Major Bennington : Benn...
Dr. Robotnik : [whispers] I'm in charge!
Dr. Robotnik : [Agent Stone shows his "badge"] You've never seen anything like this before. It says I'm the top banana in a world full of hungry little monkeys. Allow me to clarify.
[makes servo noise and turns]
Dr. Robotnik : In a sequentially ranked hierarchy based on level of critical importance, the disparity between us is to vast to quantify. Agent Stone?
Agent Stone : The doctor thinks your basic.
Dr. Robotnik : I'm initiating a sweep sequence. Ten miles in every direction should suffice.
[presses buttons and the top of the truck opens up egg drones]
Dr. Robotnik : Is he still looking at me funny?
Agent Stone : Yes, he is.
Dr. Robotnik : Tell him to stop, or I'll pull up his search history.
Agent Stone : If you don't stop looking at the doctor, he'll take a closer look at your...
Major Bennington : I'm not deaf.
Dr. Robotnik : And tell him his men report to me now. Blah-blah-blah, blah-blah-blah, blah-blah-blah.
Major Bennington : Excuse me? Listen, pal, I don't know if you realize who...
Dr. Robotnik : I'm sorry, Major. What was your name?
Major Bennington : Benning...
Dr. Robotnik : NOBODY CARES!
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Dr. Robotnik : I don't mean to be indelicate here, but someone should get some ice, keep the body fresh. He was just a silly little alien! He didn't belong here!
Tom : That little alien knew more about being human than you ever will! His name was Sonic! This was his home! And he was my friend.
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Sonic the Hedgehog : Your egg drones are impressive, Eggman! But face it, you'll never catch me!
Dr. Ivo Robotnik : Confidence... a fool's substitute for intelligence!
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[Robotnik corners Tom, Maddie and Sonic]
Sonic : That's not good.
Tom : Uhh, Sonic? I know you've got the super-speed, and everything, but Maddie and I?
Sonic : Totally defenseless? Probably gonna get blown up?
Maddie : Pretty much, yeah.
Sonic : Don't worry. I know exactly what to do.
[throws Tom and Maddie off the tower]
Dr. Robotnik : I was not expecting that!... But I was expecting to not expect something, so it doesn't count.
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Sonic : [takes down Robotnik's truck] Is that all you got?
Dr. Robotnik : No, but thank you for asking.
[deploys vehicles from his truck]
Sonic : Uh-oh.
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Dr. Robotnik : Let's go do some ROCK-conaissance!
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Dr. Ivo Robotnik : Is he still looking at me funny?
Agent Stone : Yes, he is.
Dr. Ivo Robotnik : Tell him to stop, or I'll pull up his search history.
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Dr. Robotnik : [stranded] Uninhabited planet, no resources, no supplies, no apparent way home... A lesser man would die here. I'll be home by Christmas!
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Dr. Robotnik : And nobody cares how proud your mommy is that you're now read at a 3rd grade level. Have you finished Charlotte's Web yet? Spoiler alert; she dies at the end. But she leaves a big creepy egg sac.
[egg drones fly out of the truck]
Dr. Robotnik : Ah, my babies. Whoo! Look what came out of my egg sac.
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Dr. Ivo Robotnik : I'm the top banana in a world full of monkeys.
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Dr. Robotnik : Whatever this creature is, it's our job to secure it, neutralize it, uncover the source of its power.
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Dr. Ivo Robotnik : Welcome to San Francisco, Mr. Wachowski. Are you enjoying the clam chowder?
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[Sonic runs up the Great Pyramid of Egypt]
Dr. Robotnik : You're not allowed up there! That's one of the Seven Wonders!
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Dr. Robotnik : You know what's hard about being the smartest person in the world?
Agent Stone : Everyone else seems stupid.
Dr. Robotnik : Stupid, yes! Way to go! You got that one.
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Dr. Robotnik : Agent Stone..
Agent Stone : Doctor?
Dr. Robotnik : You see anything useful in this image?
Agent Stone : [Examines screen] Nothing at all Doctor..
Dr. Robotnik : Of course you don't.. Your eyes weren't expertly trained to spot tracks by the Native American Shadow Wolves..
[Tilts head forward condescendingly]
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Dr. Robotnik : Welcome to San Francisco, Mr. Wachowski. Are you enjoying the clam chowder?
Tom : It's the government wack-job who keeps trying to kill us, UNSUCCESSFULLY! Nice of you to swing by on your way to Comic-Con.
Maddie : Yeah, what are you wearing?
Dr. Robotnik : It's a flight suit, designed to modulate my body temperature and reduce drag!
Tom : And yet, you still are one.
Dr. Robotnik : Woo-hoo, good one! You are catching fire, Thomas. Oh, and speaking of heat, I see you've taken a lover. Does she have a name or should we just call her "collateral damage"?
Tom : Hey, watch your mouth, unless you want a little more of what I gave you earlier.
[to Maddie]
Tom : I punched him in the face.
Sonic : Oh, you punched him right in the face, it was awesome!
Dr. Robotnik : The time for talking is over! It's time to push buttons!
Sonic : Your flying eggs are pretty impressive, Mr. Eggman, but let's face it: You'll never catch me!
Dr. Robotnik : Confidence. A fool's substitute for intelligence.
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Dr. Robotnik : Mr...?
Tom : Wachowski. But everyone calls me Tom. Except for my dentist, he calls me Tim. But it's gone on for so long now that it'd be weird if I corrected him.
[later on]
Tom : Listen, Mister...
Dr. Robotnik : Doctor! Doctor Robotnik. But my dentist calls me Rob.
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Dr. Robotnik : Thank you, Officer Brainfart.
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[Robotnik finds Sonic's glowing blue quill]
Dr. Robotnik : Look at that. I was right. Note the lack of surprise. Shall we try this again?
[whistles "Ride of the Valkyries" as a large drone floats in through the front door; Sonic fearfully watches from under a table as the drone deploys guns and aims at Tom]
Dr. Robotnik : I'm going to give you five seconds to tell me where it is. Five...
Tom Wachowski : I don't know what you're talking about.
Dr. Robotnik : Four...
Tom Wachowski : [shows his badge] Hey, tough guy, I'm a cop, and you're threatening an officer.
Dr. Robotnik : How can you threaten somebody who never existed? Three... Come on! Rack your brain! You might be able to come up with some lame excuse to go on living, in two... *One*!
Sonic the Hedgehog : [shows himself] Wait! Don't hurt him!
[Robotnik screams; Tom punches him]
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Dr. Robotnik : No. Don't be bothered. You just sit there and be "u"... 'seless.
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Dr. Robotnik : Eenie, meenie, miney, mayhem.
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Dr. Robotnik : Who the hell do you think you are?
Tom : I'm the Donut Lord, you son of a b...!
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[Dr Robotnik's glasses are broken]
Dr. Robotnik : Stone?
Agent Stone : Doctor?
Dr. Robotnik : Call Optical Illusions. Tell 'em I need new frames. They know which ones I like.
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Dr. Robotnik : That's one small step for man, one giant leap for me.
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Dr. Robotnik : Here's the thing: I'm never wrong.
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Dr. Robotnik : Look at that. I was right. Note the lack of surprise.
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Dr. Robotnik : I'm sure you're hella popular.
