- Rodney: You know, I honestly thought you'd changed. But no, you're just the same old Del, ploughing through life without the slightest consideration for anyone else's feelings.
- Del Boy: That hurts, Rodney. That really hurts. You just tell me one time, just one, when I have ignored you or hurt your feelings.
- Rodney: Ah, well...
- Del Boy: And don't go on about that painting competition. Or the Peckham Pouncer. Or the time I turned the knob up on the sunbed and made your face go red.
- Del Boy: I'm just glad we're not on Dragon's Den, because god knows what Alex Sugar would have made of all this.
- David Beckham: It *was* your idea to have Rodney model them.
- Rodney: So it's my fault now, is it? I didn't want to wear the stupid bloody things in the first place.
- David Beckham: Oh, shut up, you tart!
- Young Boy: Are you David Beckham?
- David Beckham: I am! But don't tell anyone. I don't want to draw any attention to myself, alright. Good boy.
- [Beckham goes to lean against a goods cart, but misses and falls to the ground. Everyone in the market turns to look at him]
- Del Boy: What a plonker!