- Sterling Archer: Jesus! All of this for an artifact I could fit in my pants?
- Zara Khan: Why is *that* your unit of measurement?
- Sterling Archer: Better than the metric system.
- Sterling Archer: We don't need a chaperone, and I speak for Zara too.
- Zara Khan: Firstly, I wouldn't even let you speak for me if I had a stroke, and you were the only person who could translate my blinks.
- Pam Poovey: Good call; he wouldn't get your accent right.
- Zara Khan: Secondly, I don't mind Ms. Kane going. I thrive being in the field with other strong female agents.
- Sterling Archer: Wow! That self-adulation just blended right in with the sucking up, didn't it?
- Zara Khan: Sort of how your chlamydia blends in with your syphilis.
- Sterling Archer: [Speaking about Clarissa] I don't know. Take off her glasses, and she's a British "8", which is an American "5" but a Canadian "10".
- Clarissa: [Talking to Lana] We can wait here for the museum to send a new truck.
- [Turning toward Archer]
- Clarissa: And in the meantime, I'd love to speak with you privately on the danger of your
- [Moves her glasses lower on her nose to look over the top of them at Archer]
- Clarissa: exciting work.
- Sterling Archer: I mean, yeah, sure. You think that's the first time I've climbed out of a moving truck and fought a child? Actually, it might be.
- Clarissa: [Walking behind Archer] Maybe you could take me to one of the rooms above the pub and tell more...
- [Drags her finger across Archer's shoulders]
- Clarissa: ... or show me.
- Sterling Archer: Wait. You're saying there are rooms above bars here? I thought that was just a myth.
- [Inhales deeply]
- Sterling Archer: Are Hobbits real?
- [Gets up to follow Clarissa]