- Preacher: Plenty speak for them and their so-called lifestyle. Media. Hollywood. Lady Gaga won't shut up for love or money.
- [churchgoers chuckle]
- Preacher: Yeah, funny. But that's why we raise our voices! And picket their so-called weddings, and their funerals. Someone has to speak for God.
- Castiel: And who says *you* speak for God? You're wrong. I am utterly indifferent to sexual orientation. On the other hand, I cannot abide hypocrites like you, Reverend.
- Preacher: Okay, fun's over, friend.
- Castiel: [walking up the aisle] Tell your flock where *your* genitals have been before you speak for Me.
- Preacher: And who the heck are *you?*
- Castiel: I'm God.
- [a parishioner stands up; Castiel renders unconscious the man, who falls back onto the pew with enough force to break it]
- Castiel: And he who lies in My name shall choke on his own false tongue, and his poisonous words shall betray him.
- [the Reverend chokes, foams at the mouth and drops dead]
- Castiel: For I am the Lord, your God.
- Dean Winchester: Um... hello? Death?
- Death: You're joking.
- Dean Winchester: I'm sorry, Death. This isn't what it seems...
- Death: [vexed] Seems like you BOUND ME.
- Bobby Singer: But that door only opens in the eclipse, and that's over!
- Death: [nonchalant] I'll make another... 3:59 Sunday morning, just before dawn. Be punctual! Don't thank me... clean up your mess.
- [pauses without glancing back at them]
- Death: Try to bind me again... you'll die before you start. Nice pickle chips, by the way!
- Leviathan: [Last lines] Cass is gone. He's dead. We run the show now. Oh, this is going to be so much fun.
- Newscast Interviewee: We all saw Him: no beard, no robe. He was young... and sexy. He had a raincoat.
- Dean Winchester: Leviathans?
- Death: I personally found them entertaining, but He was concerned they'd chomp the entire petri dish, so he locked them away.
- Dean Winchester: I've been trying to save this planet, so maybe you should find somebody better to tip off.
- Death: Maybe I should spend my effort on a better planet.
- Death: What makes you think I can do that?
- Dean Winchester: You told me.
- Death: Why should I?
- Dean Winchester: Because... We said so, and we're the boss of you. I mean... Respectfully.
- Reporter: [Dean is listening for reports on Castiel's actions] Believed to be targeted hits high up in the white-supremacy organizations, the FBI now believes the Klu Klux Klan has been forced to disband.
- Dean Winchester: Huh. Can't argue with that one.
- Dean Winchester: I don't want to hurt you.
- Dr. Weiss: Really. I'm the one with the firearm, son.
- Dean Winchester: I get that.
- [Cut to the Weiss's gagged and bound]
- Dean Winchester: We need you to kill God.
- Death: Pardon?
- Bobby Singer: Kill God. You heard right.
- [pause]
- Bobby Singer: Your... Honor.
- Castiel: I'm your new God. You will bow down and profess your love unto me, your Lord... Or I shall destroy you.
- Bobby Singer: Well... All right, then.
- [Kneels]
- Bobby Singer: This good or you want the whole forehead-to-the-carpet thing?
- Dean Winchester: What about God part deux?
- Bobby Singer: I got all kinds of feelers out. So far, diddly.
- Dean Winchester: And what exactly are you looking for?
- Bobby Singer: Exactly. What? Miracles, mass visions, trench coat on a tortilla?
- Security Guard: [Catching them trying to break-in] Hey!
- Dean Winchester: Excuse me.
- [Guard turns]
- Dean Winchester: You got any Grey Poupon?
- [Dean punches him]
- Sam Winchester: Grey Poupon? Seriously?
- Dean Winchester: It's what popped in my head.
- Sam Winchester: Dean, all we can do is talk to the guy.
- Dean Winchester: He's not a guy. He's God, and he's pissed. And when God gets righteous, you get the hell out of the way. Haven't you read the Bible?
- Dean Winchester: You know how I'm gonna deal? I'm gonna stuff my piehole, I'm gonna drink, and I'm gonna watch some Asian cartoon porn and act like the world's about to explode; because it is.
- Dean Winchester: I'm not dumb. I'm not gonna get my hopes up just to get kicked in the daddy pills again.
- News Broadcast: Freak lightning strikes on the heels of the fire that burned down the Center for Vibrational Enlightenment earlier today. Said a spokesman, "this tragedy represents the largest loss in new-age motivational speaker history."
- Sam Winchester: Motivational speakers?
- Dean Winchester: Yeah. I'm not sure new Cass gets irony any better than old Cass.
- Sam Winchester: What new boss?
- Crowley: Castiel, you giraffe.
- Bobby Singer: Is your boss?
- Crowley: He's everybody's boss! What do you think he's going to do when he finds out we've been conspiring?
- [Hopeful]
- Crowley: You do... want to conspire, don't you?
- Bobby Singer: No, we want you to just stand there and look pretty.