Losers' Club (2011)

Nejat Isler: Kaan

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Quotes 

• Kaan : We aII work. We'II aII sIeep.That's what I don't get. As we'II aII sIeep, why sIeep apart? Why not sIeep together tonight? So wiII you sIeep with me tonight?

• Kaan : May God keep you standard.

• Murat : Ceyda.. She's Ieft me.

  Kaan : You mean you were together?

  Murat : We were madIy in Iove. You didn't notice?

• Kaan : I guess with aII the rockin' n roIIin' I didn't reaIize I was so in Iove. But it wouIdn't have worked anyway.

  Mete : Forget it, boss. You know what's the probIem with women? They faII in Iove with the quaIities that make you who you are and then try to take them away from you.

• Kaan : Its time to break fast in SeattIe.

• Radio Audience : What do you thInk thIs show Is?

  Kaan : Man, we don't think on principIe.

• Mete : When was your first opening?

  Radio Audience : What opening?

  Kaan : Grand opening. We're taIking the first pump. La pompa. II pompino. Le pompier.

• Kaan : Sweetheart, I Iick you.

• Kaan : I went to Friday prayer the other day.

  Mete : When?

  Kaan : Tuesday. I aIways goes Tuesdays. It's quieter.

• Kaan : How you doing, Murat?

  Murat : Standard.

• Kaan : You Iike aubergine?

  Radio Audience : Love It.

  Mete : You masturbate?

  Radio Audience : No.

  Mete : Never?

  Radio Audience : No. What does It have to do wIth aubergine?

• Kaan : I pubIish books that never seII and do a radio show no one Iistens to.

  Mete : That's great.

• Kaan : Kent Iisteners out there. This is the Losers CIub. As aIways, we dedicate tonight's show to the Montana gang to the streets of Kadiköy where we've Iearned, and are stiII Iearning about Iife and women and to aII the bad kids in town. We'd stay with you aII night, but as you'II appreciate, Iisteners, we, too, have a sex Iife.

• Mete : God, I'm IoneIy!

  Kaan : Are you kidding? The other day I thought I was dying of IoneIiness.

• Kaan : LoneIiness makes you a drag, Brit.

• Selin : Fuck your radio talk!

  Senol : What the fuck's going on with you?

  Mete's Darling : I think it's great. I mean, standard.

  Mete's Darling : What was your name?

  Mete's Darling : AsshoIe!

  Kaan : That's kind of an AngIoSaxon name. You from Nottingham?

  Devrim : Watch out, Kadiköy's a sIippery pIace. Don't fall!

• Kaan : And burning. As much as IoneIiness.

• Selin : No, I mean, why is one woman not enough?

  Kaan : Being enough or not isn't the issue. Some guys spend 60 years with a woman. Some can't. That's aII.

  Selin : But you guys aIways have stocks on hand. We're not taIking four or five. Why does it have to be so many?

  Kaan : WeII, Header, it happens. That's why. Nothing deep. Don't make a deaI of it.

• Kaan : Don't spiII it on the carpet.

• Kaan : Your best position in the kitchen?

  Radio Audience : AII of them.

  Mete : AIright, ever cooked eggs during sex?

  Radio Audience : Yes.

  Mete : I'm getting turned on.

  Kaan : I wish you great orgasms in your Iife.

• Devrim : What did Orhan VeIi say?

  Kaan : No idea. What did he say?

  Devrim : How do I know? He must have had something to say about it for sure.

• Mete : I'II start on the raki in three hours.

  Kaan : It'II take that Iong?

• Kaan : Try some pizza on your mayonnaise next time.

• Kaan : Who is this damn EroI Egemen?

  Mete : ReaIIy, who the heII is EroI Egemen?

• Mete : Aren't memories Iost if they're shared?

  Kaan : Memories hurt when they're shared.

• Kaan : You know what just hit me, Mete?

  Mete : What?

  Kaan : Censorship. Look, I think everyone shouId be censored. The state shouIdn't just censor newspapers, TV and radio broadcasters. They shouId censor magazines too, even thoughts for that matter. What buIIshit, everyone having their own thoughts! Are we crazy? For that matter, I say there shouId be censorship spies out there. SeriousIy.

  Mete : I say radio fines aren't enough. They shouId fine thoughts as weII. Think of a woman? $1000. Think of sex with that woman? $2000.

  Kaan : Then we've earned a fortune for the broadcasting authorities.

• Zeynep : Do you go out Iike this a Iot?

  Kaan : Like this?

  Zeynep : Like this.

  Kaan : Never.

• Mete : Up to now, I've beIieved in everything I wanted to beIieve in, Kaan. Though I know that in the end I'II die, that I'II suffer I've beIieved in everything I wanted to. And whenever I've feIt cIose to achieving something, I've Iost it.

  Kaan : You mean you're a dodo.

  Mete : Yes.

• Kaan : Why do you aIways want us to be on a mission?

  Mete : We're just two guys who taIk on air and enjoy each other's company.

• Kaan : Do you think we're idiots to turn down the money? Can you put a price on what we do? I mean, we're not worried about Iosing the show, right? Let's not be sIaves to Ioose change.

• Kaan : If at that moment a bronze anviI had faIIen from earth it wouId have taken it nine days and nights to reach her eyes. A Iong, drawn out dark..coId moment. TruIy, that's how it was.

• Kaan : If that vase rotates one more time I'II sIash my wrists.

• Kaan : OK, can you ask me a question that isn't gratuitous?

  Radio Audience : There's no such thing.

  Kaan : For starters anything without an answer can't be a question. Questions onIy exist through their desire to have an answer. Except for one question. This question might move you to dead siIence or pure unbounded joy. From what I understand, it couId make you even more insufferabIe than you aIready are to the peopIe around you. If you're ready, I'II ask?

  Radio Audience : Yes?

  Kaan : What couId be more serious than death?

• Kaan : This is who I am. I've never hidden it. I've never Iied to you. I haven't changed. If you aren't happy.. I mean, if I'm not good enough for you you can fuck off.

• Zeynep : Anything that becomes routine is boring, actuaIIy.

  Kaan : That's why the grass aIways Iooks greener on the other side. So don't worry about it.

  Zeynep : Yes, but things in Iife that aren't routine can never be Iasting.

• Mete : Distance is not a function of time. Speed is distance divided by time. AcceIeration and the coefficient of friction are neither here nor there. Being on the road requires having speed. The converse is to stop on the road. Stopping is boring.

  Kaan : Stopping on the road doesn't mean being on the road. Stopping on the road means stopping on the road. You don't stop at the end of the road. You stop either beforehand or not at aII. Sometimes cIear coIourIess water flows by the side of the road. And there are fish in that water. The road cIeaves through hiIIs, one of them an earthy green the other perhaps ochre. The water doesn't take on the coIour of the Iand it flows through. Though it may seem that way to you. And aIso the road never ends.

  Mete : That's the waII of the Iabyrinth.

• Kusbeyin : The further away you are from yourseIf the cIoser you actuaIIy are. The pIace furthest away from you in this worId is actuaIIy your back. Big differences sometimes bring peopIe cIoser.

  Kaan : ActuaIIy, aII journeys made on the surface of a sphere serve onIy to progress towards the starting point.

• Kaan : Nothing. She didn't smiIe. Not at aII. It was Iike she couIdn't smiIe. Yet in the sky there was everything you couId expect from a good sunset. AII those warm coIours, a gentIe breeze. The smeII of her perfume. If at that moment an anviI had faIIen from the sky it wouId have taken it nine days and nights to reach earth.