Glee (TV Series)

The Sue Sylvester Shuffle (2011)

Ashley Fink: Lauren Zizes

Quotes 

• Will Schuester : Rachel, have you ever seen a tackle football game? When they tackle you, it hurts.

  Noah 'Puck' Puckerman : Yeah. And not in the good Mellencamp way.

  Rachel Berry : We thought about that. But the truth is, is that you guys don't really need us to play. You just need enough players out there to field a regulation team. So when they snap the ball, we're just gonna lie down on the ground. We're just gonna lie there.

  Lauren Zizes : Well, I'm not. I'm gonna bring the pain.

  Shannon Beiste : I guess they won't get hurt if you stay down.

  Will Schuester : Okay, what do your parents have to say about this?

  Tina Cohen-Chang : We all have signed permission slips from them. It took some convincing, but they understood what it means to all of us.

  Will Schuester : What do you think, Coach?

  Shannon Beiste : I think... welcome to the football team.

• Sam Evans : Why can't we just let them back on the team just for this game?

  Shannon Beiste : No. We carry this thing through, even if it means having to forfeit the game.

  Finn Hudson : I can't believe this is it.

  Rachel Berry : [sharing a look with Mercedes]  Maybe it isn't. We want to join the team.

  Artie Abrams : "We" who?

  Mercedes Jones : All of us Glee girls. We want to join the football team, and we want to play in the championship.

  Mike Chang : Come on, guys, stop screwing around. It's not cool.

  Lauren Zizes : What's not cool is you guys not respecting women enough to realize we're perfectly capable of playing football. And don't forget who the state champ in Greco-Roman wrestling is. I've got offers from three different professional wrestling organizations for after I graduate, so...

• Dave Karofsky : No freakin' way!

  Will Schuester : We don't have a choice. Sue pulled the Cheerios! from the game, so if we don't do it, there's no halftime show.

  Lauren Zizes : And this is a problem because...?

  Shannon Beiste : It's not a problem. It's an opportunity.

  Strando : Opportunity to humiliate ourselves.

  Shannon Beiste : Hey! The whole point of this week was to bring you guys together; to bring the school together.

  Azimio : Wait, so you want us to play the first half, change into some "sequeen" ball gowns, and then go out and do the halftime show at our championship game?

  Shannon Beiste : Yes.

  Azimio : It's the championship game! This is a crazy town.