Nostalgia Critic (TV Series)

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2007)

Doug Walker: Nostalgia Critic

Quotes 

• Nostalgia Critic : Grab your vintage Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles box of cookies, and enjoy the show.

  [tries to eat one and spits it out in disgust] 

• Nostalgia Critic : [about Ninja Turtles III]  This movie is horribafuckus!

• Nostalgia Critic : [about the way Splinter defeats Shredder in the first movie]  Bullshit! What kind of battle was that?

• Nostalgia Critic : [about the club scene in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret Of The Ooze] 

  Nostalgia Critic : Gee it looks like they're pretty freak out about all those monsters breaking into their club.

  Nostalgia Critic : But wait a minute.

  Nostalgia Critic : I think The Ice is feeling something.

  Nostalgia Critic : I think he's conjuring up a rap.

  Nostalgia Critic : A sort of "Ninja Rap" if you will.

  Nostalgia Critic : He is !

  Nostalgia Critic : Look at that !

  Nostalgia Critic : A totally unrehearsed yet somehow totally choreographed rap scene entirely made up on the fly.

  Nostalgia Critic : What talent.

  Nostalgia Critic : I gotta tell you this guy is going places.

  Nostalgia Critic : Like the unemployment line.

• [the first TMNT movie had a huge amount of violence and swearing, while the second one, a more kid-friendly film, tones this all down] 

  Nostalgia Critic : Never let Spike Lee direct a children's movie.

  [note: the actual director was John Singleton] 

• Nostalgia Critic : [about Super Shredder]  Jesus Christ, look at that. That is a bad-ass villain. Alright, this is gonna make up for the shitty climax in the last movie. Four mutant turtles versus one giant mutant Shredder. This is gonna be good.

  [watches Super Shredder's defeat; goes ballistic and screams] 

  Nostalgia Critic : WHAT THE FUCK?

• Nostalgia Critic : Cowa-fuckload-of-ass!