- Ian: [Teddy has decided to come out of the closet] You sure you're ready?
- Teddy Montgomery: Right now, yes. In about ten seconds, not so much.
- Erin Silver: I'm the other woman. I'm a cheater and a liar, and I'm... your iguana is judging me.
- Navid Shirazi: Bernstein's not... he's not judging you. He's myopic. He...
- Erin Silver: He's judging me, and I don't blame him. This isn't me, Navid. I'm... I'm not the girl who messes around with her friend's boyfriend.