The Simpsons (TV Series)

Chief of Hearts (2010)

Dan Castellaneta: Homer Simpson, Bank Security Guard #2, Krusty, Mr. Teeny, Rabbit

Photos 

Quotes 

• Judge Constance Harm : Homer Simpson, for causing a panic in a bank, I hereby sentence you to 100 hours of community service.

  Homer Simpson : Community service? But... that's work! What about jail?

  Judge Constance Harm : [Pounds gavel]  Community service!

  Homer Simpson : No! Please send me to jail! Free meals! Teardrop tattoos! Library books that come to you! I'll serve anything but the community!

• Chief Wiggum : Whatcha got there, Simpson?

  Homer Simpson : Just my lunch. Roast beef parm, meatball parm, eggplant parm, moo goo gai parm, my wife can parm anything.

  Chief Wiggum : My wife only parms for me on my birthday, and that's only if I give her the sad puppy face look.

• Chief Wiggum : I'm just glad we got to be friends again. You know, before we got whacked.

  Homer Simpson : We're not getting whacked, because you're Chief Wiggum.

  Chief Wiggum : You really have that much faith in me?

  Homer Simpson : Faith is for things that don't exist. Your awesomeness is real.

• Chief Wiggum : Do you ever stop breathing in your sleep?

  Homer Simpson : Sometimes. They say it's because I'm overweight.

  Chief Wiggum : What, you? No way! Now me, I'm overweight. My underwear has to be made specially at a factory in the Ukraine. They call me Daddy Round-Round. They send me a postcard every year.

  [Shows postcard of villagers standing inside underwear] 

  Homer Simpson : That is some big underwear.

  Chief Wiggum : I paid for their water distilation plant.