Hotel Mario (1994 Video Game)

Marc Graue: Mario, Luigi, Bowser

Photos 

Quotes 

• Mario : You know what they say: "All toasters toast toast!"

• Bowser : [watching Mario and Luigi walk down a path]  Hoo ha ha ha ha!

  [he hides] 

  Mario : Nice of the Princess to invite us over for a picnic, eh Luigi?

  Luigi : I hope she made lots of spaghetti!

  Mario : Luigi, look!

  [points to a letter on the door] 

  Mario : It's from Bowser!

  [reads] 

  Mario : Dear pesky plumbers; the Koopalings and I have taken over the Mushroom Kingdom! The Princess is now a permanent guest at one of my seven Koopa Hotels! I dare you to find her if you can!

  [turns to Luigi] 

  Mario : We gotta find the Princess!

  Luigi : [pointing at the screen/player]  And you gotta help us!

  Mario : [talking to player]  If you need instructions on how to get through the hotels, check out the enclosed instruction book.

• Mario : [looking into a cave]  Gee, i-i-it's kinda dark.

  Luigi : You bring a light?

  Mario : No.

  Luigi : Well, maybe a Koopa will lend us his, if we persuade him.

• Mario : It's hard to see through those clouds. I hope we can get rid of 'em.

  [breaking the fourth wall] 

  Mario : Get the hint?

• Mario : Looks kind of peaceful.

  Luigi : Looks are decieving when Koopas are involved.

• Luigi : [outtakes]  Hey, what kind of fucking place is this?

  Bowser : Hoo hoo hoo ha ha ha!

  Luigi : Ha ha ha ha yourself. So what the fuck is this about anyway?

  Mario : It's uh, that fucked up sign. Jesus, was this written by retarded kids? Club Koopa. Let's see here. Wanna suck my-What? Heh. Why don't you do me in spaghetti sauce, baby, I want to touch your garlic bread. This is, uh, kind of fucked up, you know what I mean? But I like it, you know what I'm saying?

  Luigi : You are a gay motherfucker!

  Mario : To you, I might be a gay motherfucker. But everybody else, I'm just happy. Look, I've sucked one dick, that's all.

• Mario : Hey, you! Get offa my cloud!

• Mario : Remember, when there's smoke...

  Luigi : There's fire!

• Mario : [When the timer is running out]  Gotta be quick!

• Mario : [Breaks a piggy bank open]  So this is where Wendy's hid the real coins!

• Princess Peach : [Mario and Luigi rescued Princess Peach]  Thanks to you two, I can safely rule the Mushroom Kingdom, free from the terrible Koopa King.

  [She kisses Mario and Luigi while the sigh passionately] 

  Princess Peach : [to the player]  And my thanks to you to!

  Mario , Luigi : [Waving at the player, in unison]  Your the best player ever!

• Mario : [after finding a protective spray on substance]  Ah ha! Maybe this will keep that lizard king from playing with the doors.

  [Starts spraying the substance on himself]