- Dr. Heinz Doofenshmirtz: [to Perry about the new cat] I call him Mr. Fluffypants. You know, he's fluffy and he looks like he's got pants. Plus, he reminds me of my Uncle Fluffypants, who never actually wore any pants. Come to think of it, I don't know why we called him that.
- Candace: [pulling Perry away from the rabbit] Get away from him! I don't want your blandness to rub off.
- Dr. Heinz Doofenshmirtz: [to Perry] I just love giving people nicknames. For instance, you're Mr. Duck-Bill Face. And Major Monogram, I call him "Monobrow".
- [laughs]
- Dr. Heinz Doofenshmirtz: That's a good one, you know, because he's... He's got the one, you know? And his little friend, the intern, is "Dr. Coconut"... Yeah. Sometimes, I wish I didn't know so much.
- Candace: I'm sorry we had to clean up everything destroyed and had to rebuild it. I'm especially sorry I made us miss our spa appointment. But most of all, I'm sorry for being a bad friend. I was just trying to impress Jeremy and I lost sight of...
- Stacy: Okay, you can stop that right now. You're starting to sound like one of those TV shows we like to make fun of.
- Candace: But Stacy, I...
- Stacy: Look, the way I see it, you prevented me from going to the spa, almost killed me with a jackhammer, dropped a wall on me, I've got gypsum in my hair, and basically wasted my whole day. But you did it for love, so it's okay.
- Candace: Really?
- Stacy: Yeah, remember that time in the third grade?
- Candace: You mean when you glued that hamster to my hair just to impress Billy Clark?
- Stacy: Yeah, it's just like that.
- Candace, Stacy: [both sigh] Billy Clark.
- Dr. Heinz Doofenshmirtz: [reading from a script] "Ah, Perry the Platypus! How unexpected for you to burst in my nefarious..." Nefarious? No, it's not. It's too much, even for me.