- Gloria: May I speak to Mr. Tayo Adebambo?
- Tayo: Speaking.
- Gloria: This is the American Embassy. We have some questions regarding your recent visit to the United States.
- Tayo: Excuse me, who am I speaking to?
- Gloria: [improvising] My name is... Jennifer Aniston.
- Kemi: [mouthing] Good name.
- Tayo: Mrs. Aniston, is it possible that we reschedule for another day?
- Gloria: No! It has to be right now! You have to come to our office in Abuja.
- Tayo: But Abuja is 11 hours away. Can you tell me what this is regarding?
- Gloria: Um...
- Kemi: [taking the phone] Why are you arguing with the American Embassy? Get yourself to Abuja and leave Abishola alone!
- Bob: [she hangs up, and Tayo glares at him] Sounds legit to me.
- Tunde: Bob, did you perhaps pack a scarf or a concealing hat you could wear?
- Bob: Uncle, it's 105 degrees in here. It's taking all my willpower to keep pants on.
- Olu: It is too late. He has already caught the eye of the guard.
- Bob: Because I'm not wearing a scarf?
- Tunde: Because you are the only white person here.
- Bob: They're profiling me. Well, I guess it's only fair I get a taste of it for once.
- Tunde: Oh, no, your white privilege is still accepted here in Nigeria.
- Olu: Like a Platinum Card.
- Bob: Where's Auntie?
- Abishola: Getting transportation for her and Uncle.
- Bob: Wait, we aren't going together?
- Tunde: Uh, we have to stop and pick up gifts for our relatives.
- Bob: Didn't you send Dele with, like, four suitcases worth of stuff?
- Tunde: Yes, but if a child brought four, imagine what is expected of us.
- Ade: [outside Tayo's estate] Does the gentlemen you are having problems with work here?
- Abishola: He owns it.
- Bob: All of it?
- Abishola: We will wait until nightfall, hop over the wall, find Dele, and make our escape.
- Bob: You know I will do anything in my power to help you. "Hopping" is not in my power.
- Tayo: May I speak to Abishola?
- Ebunoluwa: No. This is my house, you may speak to me.
- Bob: And what a lovely home it is.
- Ebunoluwa: Shh!
- Tayo: Your daughter has stolen my son, and she's going to take him back to America.
- Ebunoluwa: I know this.
- Tayo: You told me yourself you're happy to have Dele back in Nigeria.
- Ebunoluwa: I did.
- Tayo: So can I please come in?
- Ebunoluwa: No. Even though I agree Dele should stay here, I have to stand by my daughter's stupid and selfish decisions.
- Bob: Oh, you and my mom are gonna get along just fine.
- Kemi: Abishola has Dele.
- Gloria: [cheering with the other nurses] Thank God.
- Kemi: Because she has kidnapped him.
- Gloria: What?
- Kemi: [into her phone] Head for the Ghanaian border.
- Gloria: You're sending her to Ghana?
- Kemi: I have a former lover there. Long story. Good story.
- [to Abishola]
- Kemi: You will have to take a boat to bypass Benin and Togo.
- Gloria: Can't she just fly home?
- Kemi: Have you been a fugitive before?
- Gloria: No.
- Kemi: Then stop talking.
- Tayo: Can I offer you anything to drink?
- Abishola: I am not here for refreshments.
- Bob: Yeah, we're here for Dele.
- [to Tayo's maid]
- Bob: And a lemon-flavored sparkling water if you have it.
- Tayo: You have every reason to be upset with me.
- Abishola: I know I do.
- Tayo: It has been wonderful having Dele here. And as you saw, his sisters idolize him.
- Abishola: Eh, they can idolize him over Skype!
- Tayo: But he has reconnected with his family, with his culture.
- Abishola: Fine. When I shout at him in Detroit, I will do it in Yoruba.
- Tayo: I was only thinking of his future. If Dele's going to be a doctor, he needs to be in the best schools.
- Abishola: You think I do not know that?
- Bob: She knows that.
- Olu: Did you get everything?
- Tunde: [sadly] Yes. At the prices I wanted.
- Olu: Then what is wrong?
- Tunde: Nobody would play with me. They would just pull up the price on Amazon to show me the deal I was getting. I know the deal I was getting!
- Olu: It is not the same market it was 20 years ago.
- Tunde: What is the world coming to when no one will argue over the price of a refurbished Sony Discman?
- Tayo: This is not what I wanted.
- Bob: Really? You and me tooling around Lagos? That's not what you had in mind?
- Tayo: The first time I held Dele in my arms, I knew it was my mission to teach him and provide for him.
- Bob: And then you left.
- Tayo: Because I could not support him in America. But with Dele here, I was finally able to be the father I have always wanted to be.
- Bob: He's a great kid.
- Tayo: Yes. He is. I wanted to have this discussion with Abishola, but you know how hard-headed she is.
- Bob: [chuckling] Yeah.
- Tayo: She's immoveable.
- Bob: Like Olumo Rock.
- [seeing Tayo's look]
- Bob: It was a 15-hour flight. I read a couple guidebooks. But, honestly, that's the reason I fell in love with her.
- Tayo: Me, too.
- Bob: Thanks for the ride. I'm... glad we're finally getting the chance to talk.
- Tayo: Perhaps now you understand how much I care.
- Bob: I do.
- Tayo: And why I will not allow you or anyone to leave Nigeria with my son.
- Bob: Ah, we were doing so good here and now you ruined it.
- Bob: It was a nice try.
- Tayo: What do you mean?
- Bob: This. Your big, fancy house, all that talk about Dele's future.
- Tayo: All I want to do is provide a good life for my son.
- Bob: Yeah, well, Abishola's already doing that.
- Tayo: Are you telling me schools in Detroit are better?
- Bob: [glancing at the window, he notices Abishola sneaking past with Dele] I-I don't have that data in front of me, but, hey, let's look it up on my cell phone. Uh, wh-what's the wifi password?
- Tayo: 1-2-3-4.
- Bob: Uh, you crazy millennials and your complicated passwords.