- Twist Jackson: You know what I like about a sloppy joe? It's not the onions or the Worcester sauce or even that little bit of soda they mix in there. It's not about the dried honey, mustard or honey mustard. It's the fact that you can sit there and think about the last twenty-four hours and what you've accomplished and not worry about the negative. You ever seen "The Big Lebowski"? It's like that. I could have a nuclear warhead shoved up my ass and I wouldn't give a damn, all because of this little sandwich.
- Agent McCall: Push! Push it you pansy! My wife push harder during pregnancy and we had some big kids! This ain't BK! You sure as hell can't have it your way!
- Agent Bracher: What the hell is going on in here? Ya'll look like a bunch of firemen!
- Agent McCall: Just, uh, TPS reports, police work, catching child molesters. Big child molesters.
- Agent Dexter: You hear we got the Rodriguez case?
- Agent Bracher: Well, that's unfortunate.
- Agent Dexter: Why's that?
- Agent Bracher: No good, decent cop is going to take Rodriguez down and live to tell about it, ya hear me?
- Agent McCall: What? I KILLED HOFFA! HELL YEAH WE'RE GONNA GET RODRIGUEZ! I BEAT PRESIDENT BUSH'S ASS! I SHOT BUNDY'S COALITION DOWN! ED GEIN'S COALITION! JOHN WAYNE GACY!... You want some coffee? I think it's Colombian.
- Agent Bracher: I got to go out on patrol. See you gents later.
- Agent McCall: Hope you die, Bracher. In front of a school bus loaded with children.