Robin Hood (TV Series)

Let the Games Commence (2009)

Keith Allen: Sheriff of Nottingham

Quotes 

• Sheriff of Nottingham : You can always manage to pluck defeat from the jaws of victory!

  [Said to Guy of Gisborne] 

• Sheriff of Nottingham : You're still alive. Things must've gone well at court. Well, that can't have gone that badly, not for Prince John to provide you with men, horses...

  Sir Guy of Gisborne : ...necessities.

  Sheriff of Nottingham : So Prince John sent you back to Nottingham with a mission, and yet nobody saw fit to tell me. The last time I checked, I was still the Sheriff.

  Sir Guy of Gisborne : The Prince is *still* waiting for his 1,000 crowns. His patience wears thin.

  Sheriff of Nottingham : As indeed, does mine, what's the mission?

  Sir Guy of Gisborne : He wants me to kill Robin Hood.

  Sheriff of Nottingham : Oh, I'm sure he does. But you've, uh, you've never managed it before, Gisborne, hmm? Although you did once have him at your sword point, and yet he still bested you.

  Sir Guy of Gisborne : Well, this time will be different. This time I will command with mission without incompetent, ill-conceived interference from others.

  Sheriff of Nottingham : No. You will fail, like you always failed before, and then you will come back and beg me for my patronage.

  Sir Guy of Gisborne : Not this time. The Prince has furnished me with a weapon that not even Hood can escape.

  Sheriff of Nottingham : What weapon?

  Sir Guy of Gisborne : Oh, I will not have need of you, ever again.

• Robin Hood : I leave you alone for one minute, John... it used to be safe for children in Nottingham.

  Sheriff of Nottingham : So says that outlaw. But for once, I am pleased to see you, Hood. It means that Gisborne has snatched defeat from the jaws of victory once again!

• Bertha : [gets close to the sheriff using a flirtatious voice]  I could a settle the debt with... something better than money.

  Sheriff of Nottingham : There's no such thing.

• Sheriff of Nottingham : Do you even know how to count? Where the hell is my treasurer?

  Treasurer : You killed him, sir.

  Sheriff of Nottingham : Anybody can see that THAT is nowhere near enough! Years of loyal service. That's worth more then coins and dead outlaws, isn't it? ISN'T IT?

  Treasurer : Yes sir, it is sir!

  Sheriff of Nottingham : Apparently not. Very well. I shall pledge my allegiance in gold. Come with me, bring that book. We're going to make money!

• Sheriff of Nottingham : Can I help you? Well. Might you hang your head in shame, Gisborne. You let him escape again and this - this! Is THIS what distracted you?

  [gestures to Isabella] 

  Sir Guy of Gisborne : ...this is my sister.

  Sheriff of Nottingham : Oh. Oh, I'm so sorry. You were busy playing happy families. Your level of incompetence never ever ceases to amaze me, Gisborne. Every time I think you've plumbed a new depth, along you come and surprise me all over again. Well, maybe now prince John will remember why he put ME in command!