- Jingle Jim: Extra, extra! Read all about it! Jingle Jim says, "Guzzle my piss!"
- [urinates out the window]
- Timmy the Toy Guy: On this frosty, sacred soil, in this very toy shop, my papa asked my mama to have sexual intercourse and she consented. And 18 seconds later, I was conceived.
- Teenage Girl Activist: Are you all crazy? Timmy's a fucking Neo-Nazi! And I know I call a lot of people that, but he really is.