- Jaskier: [singing] Lock me up and sock me up/ Throw away the key/ Go fuck yourself, you whoreson/ 'Cause you're through fuckin' with me...
- Prison Guard: Sing another word, and I'll cut your tongue out!
- Jaskier: Rude.
- [Turns to a group of rodents]
- Jaskier: Guys, your harmonies were a little pitchy.
- [to one mouse]
- Jaskier: Gordon, you're amazing. Talent recognizes talent.
- Yarpen Zigrin: You remember my men.
- Jaskier: Of course. Good to see you all again.
- [to Geralt]
- Jaskier: I have absolutely no recollection of any of these people.
- Nenneke: Do you believe Yennefer means to harm the girl?
- Geralt of Rivia: I wish Yennefer knew of the balance you spoke of. More than you know, I wish it. But I learned my lesson about Yennefer and wishes.
- Geralt of Rivia: She wouldn't.
- Jaskier: She would. What? Sacrifice your Child Surprise to get her magic back? You bet your bloated biceps she would.
- Jaskier: Gah, you are always so emotional! I mean, it's just yap, yap, yap with you sometimes.
- [Mimicking Geralts voice]
- Jaskier: "Oh, Jaskier, I'm so sad and complicated!"
- Geralt of Rivia: Shut up, Jaskier.
- Jaskier: You shut up. That's a perfect impression of you, by the way.
- Yarpen Zigrin: [Upon spotting Geralt and Jaskier] If it isn't the White fuckin' Wolf and the big fuckin' mouth.
- [to his crew]
- Yarpen Zigrin: Put your weapons down, numpty arseholes. This is an old friend.
- Jaskier: Uh, friends. Plural.
- Cahir: Half of the elves did not muster for training this morning.
- Fringilla: The celebration of the child's birth went late into the night.
- General Hake: Oh, grand. We're larding up with pointies who can't hold their drink or can't follow orders.
- Fringilla: I will talk to them.
- General Hake: *You* are not their commander.
- Sigismund Dijkstra: Tissaia acts detached, but she lets relationships cloud her judgment. Stregobor will take advantage of that. If I were a betting man...
- King Vizimir of Redania: If you were a betting man, you'd be betting with my money. I pay you to solve problems, Dijkstra, not fill my head with piling bad news.
- Sigismund Dijkstra: Not bad news, my lord. *Bedlam*. And if our goal is to destabilize the Continent, bedlam is good news.
- Artorius: Not all of us have your soft spot for elves, Tissaia.
- Vilgefortz: She's a co-chair on this council. She doesn't have soft spots.
- Stregobor: Well, you'd know.
- Yennefer: Magic. It's lodged in you. Like a spiked arrow. It wounds you. Deeply. But it's a strange sort of pain. Combined with... bliss. Trust me. It's all you'll ever need. It's everything.
- Ciri: I want to believe you. I really do, but... when you had magic, you controlled the Chaos. But it controls *me*.
- Jaskier: What about Yennefer?
- Geralt of Rivia: If she's hurt Ciri, I may just have to kill her.
- Jaskier: Oh, no, well, obviously we'll kill her. We'll definitely kill her. I just haven't found a good enough jabbing stick yet.