Quotes
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Chas Finster : Oh look, Boris, your play made the front page! "Synagogue Seniors Stage Meaning of Chanukah."
Grandpa Boris : [looks at newspaper] Wonderful! They took my picture for this. Oy gevalt! They used Shlomo's picture instead of mine!
Chas Finster : What's a "Shlomo?"
Didi Pickles : He's an old friend of Boris from his school days back in Russia.
Grandpa Boris : What friend? Ever since we were young, he always tried to outdo me. I caught a smelt, he caught a sturgeon. I caught a cold, he caught the pneumonia. I start a family, he starts his "fancy-shmancy" business.
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Grandpa Boris : All my life you're upstaging me!
Shlomo : Me? You're the one who's always bragging - my children this, and my grandchildren that. On and on!
Grandpa Boris : You'd be proud of your children too, if you had any! But, nah, you were too busy with your fancy-pants business deal!
Shlomo : [gasp] Is that what you think?
Grandpa Boris : That's what you said!
Shlomo : So sue me, I lied! Sadie and I, may she rest in peace, were never blessed with children! All I had was my fancy-pants business, Mr. Know-so-much! So now you know.
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Grandpa Boris : [takes one of Didi's latkes] The miracle is, these things have clogged our people's arteries for 2,000 years, yet we survive.
