The Witcher (2007 Video Game)

Jacek Kopczynski: Dandelion (Jaskier)

Quotes 

• Zoltan Chivay : You hungry?

  Geralt of Rivia : [drunk]  A little.

  Zoltan Chivay : We've bread, but we shouldn't eat plain bread.

  Dandelion : Zoltan's right. We need some lard.

  Zoltan Chivay : That mummy downstairs must have a full larder...

  Geralt of Rivia : You're joking!

  Dandelion : That mummy must have some lard, maybe pickles, too.

  Geralt of Rivia : Shani?

  Shani : Just don't get caught, Geralt. I'll pay for them tomorrow.

  Geralt of Rivia : Wait a second. Why me?

  Zoltan Chivay : Dwarves are no masters of stealth, Shani wouldn't sneak about and Dandelion, well, he'd mess up.

• Dandelion : [asking for Grandma's diary]  Show me. I wonder what granny did when she was younger... bet she was a real player.

  Geralt of Rivia : One track mind.

  Shani : [reading the diary]  Dandelion's right! Five lovers in the first few pages.

  Carmen : Still water runs deep...

• Dandelion : Geralt, I was looking for you. I had no idea Nurse Natalia was such a wellspring of passion. You've ever seen her leaning over her patients? Those eyes!

• Dandelion : You've changed for the worse. Thanks for darkening my day.

• Dandelion : Then bold Foltest uttered these words: "Virtous Radovid..."

  Geralt of Rivia : What the hell is that?

  Dandelion : I'm trying to keep a faithful and accurate record of these events.

  Geralt of Rivia : He said, "Stop deliberating, son, we need to put out the fire in this whorehouse".

  Dandelion : Geralt, you have no sense of poetry. There's the truth of time and the truth of legend.

• Carmen : I have an idea: let's play a game.

  Geralt of Rivia : [drunk]  Hmm...

  Shani : It's a brilliant idea!

  Dandelion : I never turn down Carmen when she proposes a game.

  Geralt of Rivia : What game?

  Carmen : Truth or dare.

  Dandelion : Oo... like sexual dares?

  Carmen : Relax, Dandelion, no. Let's say you'd have to steal something from the old lady's cupboard downstairs.

  Dandelion : All right, I'll start. Shani, remember when I walked in on you and Geralt in Oxenfurt...

  Geralt of Rivia : Dandelion, don't go there...

  Shani : Unfair. I can't anger the old lady. She'll throw me out!

  Geralt of Rivia : Then you must tell the truth...

  Dandelion : How did you and Geralt end up in such a compromising position?

  Shani : Umm... professional curiosity. I was researching the influence of mutagens on a witcher's physical condition. I admit I found no defects. Speaking of which, you could use some exercise, Dandelion. It's good for your health.

  Geralt of Rivia : Ahem...

  Carmen : Sweetie, you clearly don't know Dandelion that well. They don't call him 'the tongue of the North' for no reason.

• Dandelion : How did you get here?

  Geralt of Rivia : By teleport.

  Dandelion : Triss teleported me too. It was amazing. I always wanted to see what it's like.

  Geralt of Rivia : She did that for you? Must be having an off day.

  Dandelion : So why did Triss teleport you here?

  Geralt of Rivia : Let's say she saved me from the kiss of death.

  Dandelion : Interesting, perhaps I'll use it in my new ballad. In any case, what a truly delightful place. Triss said we should stay here until Princess Adda stops dreaming of slitting your throat.

  Geralt of Rivia : I'd have to agree... So, tell me about this place... in prose, if you don't mind.

  Dandelion : It's a charming area, thoroughly magical in its mood. The peasants seem altogether happy, while the peasant women are... mmmmmmmmm...