They/Them/Us (2021) Poster

(2021)

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4/10
We're confused
chloewicks-508025 February 2022
Warning: Spoilers
They/Them/Us was a genuinely entertaining Friday night experience but truly felt confused in every way possible. To start off, Amy Hargreaves was excellent. She was the only character we thoroughly enjoyed. We also thought the sex-positivity within an older demographic was something less represented in popular media and depicted well in the movie. The movie did not depict the BDSM community as weird and instead, as very excepting. Also, being Columbus natives we loved the shots from around the city.

As for the rest of the movie, it seemed progressive through a Millenials eyes' in the worst way possible. First, the title of the movie, They/Them/Us, was clearly getting at the conjoined divorce family coming together and getting along. While it was a clever pun of them coming together, they severely stereotyped the gender non-conforming character. They made Charlie a saint for just respecting their pronouns; however, all the characters acted as if they/them pronouns were strange-- even the kids. It just felt like a basic view of nonbinary people.

It was obvious how the drug addiction plotline was under-researched and hysterical. Both weed and LSD are non-addictive drugs. The way weed is villainized is confusing. First, Charlie partook in smoking on more than one occasion. The first time the kids really got along on screen was when they got high. But for some reason, it was seen as the worst thing possible. Charlie sent his son away for smoking weed and doing LSD, but partook in it himself and was boiling at the idea his son could've done that. He treated his son so poorly when he said adults and kids "aren't equals" and he doesn't need his son's respect.

Lastly, Charlie's relationship with his students was really weird. We get that he wasn't religious, but talking about BDSM to his young students was uncomfortable and looked suspicious considering his briefly mentioned and brushed over past. The movie was a cacophony of stereotypes and didn't bring anything constructive to the nuanced conversations with which it attempted to grapple.
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3/10
Where's the fun part ?
ks-6050023 February 2022
I seldom write reviews until I see so many 10/10 reviews just can't hold my anger anymore. Single parents with kinky interests met and bring their kids together. Go to kinky club and leave the kids alone with weed left behind. Selfish irresponsible jerks I seen. And the worst is, which parts n lines are laughable ? Come on.....
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1/10
Disjointed. Was not worth the highest rating.
rooroo-600036 February 2022
Slow, awkward, and felt disjointed. Alot going on and the scenes simply do not connect together.

People are being encouraged to come here and give this movie the best rating no matter what. That the low ratings are from the "radical right". I'm not going to blindly review. I decided to watch it and see for myself before I reviewed it. The movie does not deserve the best rating. It was an okay movie. Artificial high reviews are not going to change that.
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1/10
Beware the top reviews, it's a dud.
Avidviewer-028476 February 2022
One of those movies where you ask yourself after watching it, "Why was it made?" It's not even funny, it's just stupid. Dumb script and characters that aren't appealing. Don't waste your time.
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7/10
Best picture of the scene as it's actually lived
verdie8 February 2022
I've been a writer and educator in the BDSM scene for thirty years, and I've traveled around the country to speak to kinksters (including more than a few visits to Columbus, where the movie is set). I didn't catch this film making a single misstep in terms of the scene as it actually exists in outwardly mainstream, heterosexual America - if you want to know what lies behind all the popular images of latex-clad dominatrixes in towering heels, this is your movie.

It was not flawless. Some bits were thrown in there for cheap laughs, and others to move the plot along (often a bit faster than is realistic). But both principals are completely believable and moving, as are their four kids, particularly the non-binary teen and the teen with drug issues.

I think the film may have audience problems, in that people who want to hear about blended families in the 21st century do not necessarily want to hear about BDSM, and vice versa. But if you have any interest in either topic, and you're reasonably open-minded about alternative sexualities and genders, this is well worth a couple of hours of your time.
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2/10
ruined by constant 'you guys'
jh_thorn2 December 2022
Super annoying. Would have been way better without every character calling everyone else 'you guys'. Filmmakers who think that little of the audience need to find another profession. Would have been way better without every character calling everyone else 'you guys'. Filmmakers who think that little of the audience need to find another profession. Would have been way better without every character calling everyone else 'you guys'. Filmmakers who think that little of the audience need to find another profession. Would have been way better without every character calling everyone else 'you guys'.
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7/10
Funny in an endearing way - and concise!
reviewsfortherestofus27 March 2022
This well-acted, well-directed, and well-scripted romp through the minefield of blended families and mildly kinky sex will have you smiling and feeling good for ... 90 minutes. You heard me: not three hours, not two hours, but 90 concise minutes. Unlike all that caped tripe where the world is being saved from one idiotic peril after another, this indie film gets to the point and is made for ... gasp ... grown-ups. The one-star reviews were clearly produced by people who were having a hemorrhoidal flare-up that day, and the ten-star people were involved in the making of; the truth is north of five stars, though. They/them/us is a perfectly safe, modern take on the family that will entertain any adult of any persuasion, and may even delight their teenage kids. A solid seven.
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10/10
Really great movie!
miracb-928584 February 2022
This is a really great movie showing some of the complexities of modern blended families and modern parenting. I loved the balance of funny moments and thoughtful moments. Really well done!
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10/10
Relentlessly entertaining
sagemlewis25 January 2022
This movie hits all the marks, it had me laughing, crying, and everything in between. A candid and hilarious story grounded in real life with characters that speak to emotional phases in all stages of life. It highlights to the adventure inherent in raising teenagers, finding love after a first marriage ends, and following an artistic life, all while fumbling along the way and laughing at the absurdity these circumstances can create.
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10/10
Great Movie!
trinagard14 September 2021
Finally...Hollywood has a realistic version of what a real mid-western blended family looks like. Director Jon Sherman along with his partner and co-writer Melissa Vogley-Woods bring to life an amazing Rom-Com that explores what it means to create a new family, with all the joys and challenges that come along with it.

All families have issues and this family is no different. They have a son who is headed for rehab, a daughter who is gender fluid, and two other daughters who are dealing with being the children of separated parents. Plus there is the added strain on the kids of their parents new romantic partners coming into their lives.

The movie also does an incredible job of showing the BDSM Community as it really is...a diverse amalgam of folks from all walks of life who choose to explore and express their sexuality creatively, spiritually, and of course kinkily. This is not a Shades of Grey or Eyes Wide Shut version of BDSM. Amy Hargraves and Joey Slotnick show the humanity and vulnerability of normal people open to discovering new parts of their sexuality with their partners.

This film is filled with rawness and humor and most of all realness. I appreciate the story they tell and the way they tell it. Kudos to Jon and Melissa for writing such a wonderful screenplay and a round of applause to the actors who it brought it to life.
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10/10
Excellent!
ubrod24 January 2022
I'm biased as I know Melissa and now Jon, but still I don't say positive things about things I don't actually believe are positive. It was a fun movie to watch and a great story line! And, if you're at all curious about the BDSM scene you'll get a wee education too! Fun, but not for the whole family!! Unless you're kinky I guess! Ew...weird. Go and see it, just not with your own kids!
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10/10
Delightfully entertaining!
jlkovach-598-11096230 January 2022
Director and writer Jon Sherman, along with his talented partner and co-writer Melissa Vogley-Woods, tell the story of what it means to be part of a family with great humor and sincerity. I enjoyed this film immensely, and recommend it to everyone who appreciates the joy, challenges, and often the absurdity of family life--especially with teenagers. The Midwest setting for the film is also refreshingly new for romantic comedies, and the casting was nothing short of magical.
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10/10
Headline
thomas-fritchman4 February 2022
Review.this review contains 150 characters now. Why do they make me do essays when all anyone cares about is the numbers? Lol. Sigh. Oh well, I guess I'll keep typing until they let me show you all how much I loved this movie.
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8/10
Well Made Small Budget Film
bowyerboy9 February 2022
This is a small budget movie, and that is not a bad thing, but it also means that the story and the acting have to be good. The actors, everyone of them, deliver. Joey Slotnick had plenty of opportunities to make his character absolutely ridiculous. Instead he hits precisely the right balance of smart, funny, awkward, caring, and lost that most of us feel in our own lives. Sometimes he gets it right, sometimes he gets it wrong, and sometimes he just can't win. But you like him and you root for him. Amy Hargreaves is amazing, as well. She provides an extremely nuanced performance as Lisa, portraying her as highly competent in many areas of her life and less confident in others. Sometimes placing her needs (and her kink) on the back burner in order to preserve her relationship and her family. To sum up her character and performance in a word, it has to be charming. I think all of the actors portraying the kids have bright futures ahead, because every one of them nailed it.

As far as story, the film either needed another ten or fifteen minutes or a subplot cut. While billed as a comedy, there are some pretty heavy dramatic moments. Having said that, the script was well written and the story is complex without being overly opaque. There are some very funny moments in this film, so it deserves the comedy tag, but dramedy might be a better description.

Now we come to the kinky bits. This was refreshingly realistic. Most people into kink have jobs, families, bills to pay, and the normal headaches of living. This film does a nice job of showing that. They have fun with kink and kinksters while also respecting it, so kudos for that.

All in all, I really liked this film. It was nice to watch a film that was actually shot in reality and not crammed with CGI. If you are from the Columbus, OH area, you'll probably have a lot of fun recognizing the locations. The acting was great and the story was very good. Worth your time.
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10/10
Funny, Quirky, Sexy RomCom that hits All the Emotions!
travelngirl5 February 2022
Warning: Spoilers
I laughed, cried and most of all.... Related....to the characters in this film as their story unfolded. Difficulties of divorce after 40 (that your teens blame you for), finding a relationship and deciding together to blend a family of 4 teens.(each with their own issues), pushing yourself out of your comfort zone to explore your sexuality because you care about your partner and putting family first were all touched on. All these very relevant issues in today's life were presented with the right touches of humor, laughs and seriousness!!! I would say this is a film definitely for adults. Ohhh....and I think The Kink Community (which was portrayed accurately and realistically!) will love it!! Kudos to Director Jon Sherman and his partner and co-writer Melissa Vogley-Woods.
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