- Ned: Just because there's a dead body it doesn't mean you get paid.
- Emerson Cod: Just because there is vodka in my freezer it doesn't mean I have to drink it. Wait, yes it does.
- Coroner: [to Emerson] May I have a word with you? Why are you bothering this poor woman? You and that white boy got some kind of shifty going on? I don't know what, but you're shifty.
- Olive Snook: I recently made the acquaintance with a pair of bird lovers, I'll consult them.
- Narrator: Olive was referring to Aunts Lily and Vivian.
- Charlotte 'Chuck' Charles: Really? I used to know a pair of bird lovers!
- Narrator: Chuck also referred to Aunts Lily and Vivian.
- Olive Snook: Used to? Did they die?
- Charlotte 'Chuck' Charles: Death was involved.
- Olive Snook: Hey, gang.
- Ned: Olive, what are you doing here?
- Olive Snook: Pie delivery. Tart apple, I believe.
- Narrator: And with those two words, Chuck could already see, her aunts were here.
- Charlotte 'Chuck' Charles: Olive?
- Olive Snook: If you know what's good for you, and I think you do, you'll give me two minutes.
- Emerson Cod: Why?
- Ned: What for?
- Charlotte 'Chuck' Charles: Okay.
- Olive Snook: Goody, then.
- [the curator passes out, and Emerson refers to a conversation he had with Ned in the "Pie-lette"]
- Emerson Cod: *That's* a narcoleptic. Necrophiliac's the *other* one.
- Ned: Yeah.
- Jackson Lucas: [after being revived] I can't see anything! Am I blind?
- Ned: Good news is you're not blind. Bad news is you're dead.
- Charlotte 'Chuck' Charles: Makes blind seem like a walk in the park, doesn't it?
- Elsita: Oh no, you didn't use bows to tie me up, did you? You take a hostage like you tie your sneakers.
- Emerson Cod: What is the rate of exchange on the life of a bird, because if it's greater than or equal to mine I need to get back to my car.