- Piggy: [imagines she's on TV] Hello. My name is Piggy and I'm running for president. You should vote for me because I'm smart and adorable, um, and a born leader, and because if you don't... YOU'LL BE SORRY!
- [Gonzo imagines himself as ruler of the nursery and there are no rules]
- Fozzie: Gosh, if there are no rules at all, then I can make up the rules of a good joke. Hmm. Aha, I know. Why did the potato go to Paris? Give up? To be a French fry. Wokka wokka wokka. Ha ha ha ha.
- [a crowd boos and throws French fries at Fozzie]
- Fozzie: French fries? What happened to tomatoes?
- [a tomato is thrown at Fozzie]
- Fozzie: Yeah. French fries are better with ketchup.
- Kermit: Gee, Fozzie, I guess rules or no rules, a bad joke is a bad joke.
- [the kids had finished placing their votes for the president of the nursery]
- Skeeter: I'll count the votes. One for Piggy. Two for Piggy.
- Piggy: Oh, goody. I just know I'm gonna win.
- Skeeter: One for Kermit. Two for Kermit. Three for Kermit.
- Piggy: What? Hmph!
- Skeeter: It's two votes for Piggy and six for Kermit. Kermit won!
- [everyone cheers]
- Kermit: Um, I-I voted for you, Piggy.
- Scooter: I wonder who the other person was.
- Piggy: Uh... Congratulations, Kermie! I am going to be your first lady, aren't I?
- Kermit: Oh, uh, uh, uh, sure, Piggy.
- Reporter: Mr. President, how does it feel to be the first frog in the White House?
- Kermit: Uh, well, it feels, uh, green. I mean keen. I-It feels real keen.