My Family (TV Series)

The Art of Being Susan (2006)

Rosemary Leach: Grace

Quotes 

• Grace : You know, if I'm going to be staying here for any length of time, I'm going to need all the help I can get.

  Susan Harper : What do you mean, length of time? Ben's only away from his training course for a week.

  Grace : Oh, he's learning to use a knife and fork? It's wonderful!

• Grace : The point is until he gets back, I'm here for you, darling.

  Susan Harper : Here for me as in running up the phone bill, insulting the neighbours and draining the drinks cabinet?

  Grace : I hardly use the phone!

• Susan Harper : Mothers usually go back to work full time when their kids start school. I didn't feel like I could leave you lot alone until last month.

  Janey Harper : Are you suggesting that raising us was difficult?

  Susan Harper : No, I'm suggesting it almost sucked the life out of me.

  Grace : There are ways to get that life back, Susan!

  Susan Harper : Yes, mother, but I want to remember mine!

• Lionel : [Looking at a sculpture of two figures embracing]  According to the catalogue, this is called 'Passion'. What do you think?

  Grace : I think they're not doing it right.

• Susan Harper : [Trying on a dress]  So, what do you think? I'm aiming for demurely attractive.

  Grace : You've missed!

• Janey Harper : Look, mum, nobody's asking you to cheat on dad.

  Grace : I am!

• Janey Harper : Mum, this is not a problem. If this guy James is interested, you'll know. Yeah, men send subtle signals.

  Susan Harper : Like what?

  Janey Harper : Well, like, if he tries to feed you anything, don't let him - he's just trying to gain your trust. If he locks eyes with you for more than three seconds, he wants you.

  Grace : And if he puts his hand on your breast, that's a biggie, too! At least it was in my day!

• Grace : I... I didn't expect you f... for another hour!

  Susan Harper : Been having a nice time, mother?

  Grace : Don't be such a party pooper! You didn't give us a chance to clear up!

  Susan Harper : Us?

  Lionel : You going to be much longer, Gracie? I'm not sure how long these pills last!

  Susan Harper : Oh, mum!

  James : OH, DAD!

• Grace : I am not a child! I'm an adult!

  Susan Harper : Then act like one!

• James : Have you any idea of the upset you have caused your daughter and me?

  Grace : Don't care!

  Susan Harper : Perhaps I'll make you care - no more gin for a month!

  Grace : Well, that's not fair!

  Lionel : Is this going to take much longer? My pill's starting to wear off!

• Grace : You know, Susan, as a person gets older, they tart to get very set in their ways and it becomes harder for them to admit that they're wrong and apologise.

  Susan Harper : [pause]  Well, go on.

  Grace : I was waiting for you!

• Grace : You should start thinking of me as a person and stop thinking about me as a parent!

  Susan Harper : I haven't thought about you as a parent since I was 9!

• Grace : I was rather hoping you would interrupt me and my big speech and ask me to stay.

  Susan Harper : Oh, alright! But only because I'm genetically programmed to care about you!