Psych (TV Series)

Woman Seeking Dead Husband: Smokers Okay, No Pets (2006)

Dulé Hill: Burton Guster

Photos 

Quotes 

• Shawn Spencer : [during a fake seance]  Eyes of a serpent, ears of a bat, send us a signal from...

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : Shawn!

  Shawn Spencer : I hear a voooooice...

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : Can I see you outside, please.

  Shawn Spencer : It wants me to come outsiiiiiide...

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : NOW!

  Shawn Spencer : I should gooooo...

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : Is that my bathrobe?

  [they move to the other room and Gus closes the blinds] 

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : What are you doing?

  Shawn Spencer : What does it look like I'm doing? I'm having a seance.

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : You can't have a seance.

  Shawn Spencer : Gus there are no rules against having a seance. Anyone can have one. It's like a garage sale or plastic surgery.

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : Okay, first of all, technically you need a permit to have a garage sale. Secondly, *you* cannot speak to the dead!

• Burton 'Gus' Guster : What the hell are you doing?

  Shawn Spencer : Checking baseball scores. My fantasy team is killing me.

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : This is the chief's office.

  Shawn Spencer : No, she runs the league. I'm kidding. She's in a meeting. She won't mind. Plus we look really important hanging out in here. Gus, have you tried this chair? It's a pregnancy chair. We have got to get one for the office. My birthing canal never felt so alive.

• Gus : She's a charming woman.

  Shawn Spencer : A charming woman? Are you Jane Austen now?

• Burton 'Gus' Guster : You're taking my name off the lease and the door and these Frisbees.

  Shawn Spencer : Gus, don't be ridiculous. Look, I'm almost positive this isn't a load bearing wall. But if you're really concerned, why don't you jump up and down in the attic to make sure?

• Shawn Spencer : [after describing his plan to Gus]  ... and Bingo!

  Gus : Don't say bingo, you know how much I hate it when you say that.

  Shawn Spencer : Ok, fine... Yahtzee?

  Gus : We are not doing this, Shawn.

  Shawn Spencer : Mah-Jong!

• Burton 'Gus' Guster : This is breaking and entering!

  Shawn Spencer : [trying to pick a lock]  No, no, no - only if we break something, and THEN enter something.

• Gus : This is not a good time to bluff!

  Shawn Spencer : I think it's a great time, she was going to kill us.

• Shawn Spencer : Gus, I'm not a mind-reader.

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : No, that's just what you tell everybody.

• Burton 'Gus' Guster : [of David]  He *does* have nice hair.

  Shawn Spencer : Yeah, that takes a lot of up keep though, man.

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : Yeah.

  Shawn Spencer : You gotta worry about split ends...

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : Dandruff.

  Shawn Spencer : Dandruff!

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : It's horrible.

  Shawn Spencer : It's awful.

• Shawn Spencer : [of Chief Vick's pregnancy chair]  I want you to try this chair.

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : I'm not trying the chair, Shawn.

  Shawn Spencer : I'll sit on the birthing ball. I kid you not, this thing is like a refreshing waterfall cascading down your vertebrae. It might help your stomach issues.

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : Who told you I had stomach issues?

  Shawn Spencer : Uh, my nose. The vent in the bathroom. Air fresheners all over the place.

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : I'm trying a new medication for my lactose intollerance.

  Shawn Spencer : I believe the problem is physical. And I think it can be cured by what I am now referring to as "The Magic Springy Bounce-Up Chair."

• Burton 'Gus' Guster : [after a large window shatters]  Did you do that?

  Shawn Spencer : Why would I ruin our totally cool window?

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : For effect! To make them think you contacted an evil spirit.

  Shawn Spencer : Gus, please! Why didn't you float that idea sooner? That's genius!

• [Gus walks in on Shawn holding a "seance"] 

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : Shawn?

  Shawn Spencer : [eerie voice]  I hear a voice...

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : Can I see you outside, please?

  Shawn Spencer : [eerie voice]  It wants me to come outside.

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : Now?

  Shawn Spencer : [eerie voice]  I should go.

• Gus : Somebody's here.

  Shawn Spencer : Oh, you can see through doors now? That's the new thing?

  Gus : I can smell the laundry vent.

• Burton 'Gus' Guster : How much farther to this place?

  Shawn Spencer : Fifty, sixty miles.

  Burton 'Gus' Guster : Sixty miles? And you didn't get me a donut?

  Shawn Spencer : I did get you a donut. And then I ate it.